My girlfriend is showing all the signs of being depressed

This is going to be a long one so bear with me!

I have been with my gf for a year now but over the past few months she has just not been herself. So used to be such a happy, smiley, energetic person who wanted to be doing something all the time. Now she is constantly tired, bored, can't be bothered to do anything and quite moody at times. She has lost interest in some of her favourite things too and is getting quite forgetful and I can recognise all of these symptons as depression on some scale.

I have been suffering from depression on and off for over 2 years now and so I recognise all these signs as I had them myself.

I know that there are certain types of depression and they are usually caused by 1) something major in your life that needs sorted out 2) a chemical imbalance in the brain. Lets rule out number 2 and say that something in her life needs sorted out. The only major change in her life recently is that she has started back at school after the summer to do highers. She is always telling me about how hard it is and how much work she has although she always manages to get it done and is doing quite well from marks she is currently receiving. She has what you might call an unruley younger sister who seems to get preferential treatment from her parents and I have seen this for myself (but she makes it sound a lot worse than it is!). The only other thing is she is not happy with our relationship. We love each other very much but the actual relationship has become rather boring and pretty much a routine. You may remember my post about it.

The thing is it is a viscious circle now. I am pretty sure the relationship is causing all or part of this depressed behaviour and in turn is making it worse i.e. being bored, not wanting to do anything, being tired etc.

Now because I have been suffering from depression myself on and off, I am getting worried that this might tip me back into it and so make her worse and make me worse etc etc.

I have touched on the subject with her and she says that its just because she is having trouble sleeping. I know a lot of people go through some type of insomnia in their lives but what she describes is an exact symptom of depression. It is being very tired all day then at night going to bed and sleeping straight away out of sheer exhaustion but then only to wake up in the early hours, around 4 or 5am and not being able to get fully back to sleep, and then it's time to get up. This is exactly what I had.

I am pretty convinced she has depression but I'm not sure she realises it. What can I do? I am very worried about her and our relationship. If I am wrong and bring it up with her it could really damage our relationship. I am quite sure that some of you may suggest counselling which I too think might be a good idea but as I said I'm not sure she realises anything is wrong, it could just hurt her and damage our relationship.

Advice please!! I'm going nuts here!

Thanks in advance

well you say that she isn't happy about the relationship possibly that it is routine, well try something new...do something out of the ordinary, when she gets home decide to do something fun, or wait until she is done with her work, whatever works...don't be routine....as for her depression sometimes these things work themselves out sometimes they don't, give it a little time...maybe for the sleep thing give her a nice massage before she goes to sleep, or if she wakes up early ask her to wake you up also, and again find a way to get her back to a sound sleep for a bit. pretty much just try to get through it together, don't back away from her because your afraid your gonna get depressed too much. if things get worse then suggest some counseling.

I agree.. try making plans for a special evening... maybe a nice present or tiken of your love and dinner a massage something out of the ordinary...then sit back and see what happens it could just be life in general and she might snap out of it

thanks for your suggestions!

i got her a few little presents for our aniversary and am taking her out for the day tomorrow and she seems better allready!!