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Thread: family troubles

  1. #1
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    family troubles

    i am 16 years old and my whole life my mom or her friends have always beating me. when i was 5 my grandmas husband at the time raped me and when i turned 7 my stepbrother did the same. when i was 13 my mom and step-dad got a divorce and she said it was my fault. after a while i couldnt take living with her anymore so i moved my with my grandma (the only person who never hurt me) well i'm fat and not very pretty~i know this and i dont need her telling me~ and lately all she does is tell me that im fat and no man is ever going to want me if i look like a beached whale... i dont know what to do. i dont have anywhere else to go and ive been very depressed lately... i dont know what to do and i need help.

  2. #2
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    Hey,

    It sounds like you've been through a lot. The good thing you have going for you is your attitude. It's hard growing up, having to deal with all that you have gone through. My best advice to you is to keep thinking positive and try to be the best you can be. You came here to ask for help and improve your quality of life. The only real way to do that is if you keep that mindset.

    Don't worry about your weight, but you can always lose it. The one part of you that is the hardest to control is your brain, so as long as that's going for you the rest is real easy. Personally I'm very skinny and it's hard for me to eat enough food to gain weight. I don't have a problem such as a disorder, however my metabolism is high. I also spend a lot of time inside so I don't get enough exercise. I'm 17 now and have realized that I need to do something so I've spent the last several months working out and eating healthier. Gradually I'm getting stronger and gaining some weight. You want to do the opposite, but you can do the same things that I am. Eat healthy and exercise a lot. Rather than sitting around and thinkng about your past, take that time to go out and do something that you know is helping you.

    You're still young enough where most of your life is ahead of you. You have plenty of time to be whoever you want to be. Remember though that that doesn't meaning changing who you are now.

    - Chris

  3. #3
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    thank you.. i just needed to vent i guess.. thanx for the advice and good luck with your gaining..

  4. #4
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    Sorry to hear all of those bad things happening to you.

    It's really common for some older people to critique a girl's weight...and they usually don't intend to be mean, they're trying to spark a reaction - it comes out wrong. I think she is concerned for you. For the older generations of women, attracting a man was the number one priority.

    Understand, there is nothing "bad" with being overweight. But there are a lot of negative health problems that can result later on in life. Losing excess weight isn't a beauty issue, it's one of health. Getting down to a normal weight range can improve many thing for you most importantly your lifespan.

    If you work to lose weight, and it WILL be hard, but ANYONE can do it, your self esteem will shoot through the roof. You will FEEL healthier, FEEL more attractive, and FEEL better about your life in general.

    And you know what? You have already come so far overcoming what happened in your childhood. This is just a minor obstacle for you. Just take the courage to go out there and make your life better.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Hope75's Avatar
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    I'm so sorry that all of this has happened to you in your short life.

    I wish there was more I could say to you, but right now I think the most important thing is to ignore your grandmother's selfish and childish comments, stay out of her way, and focus on your education and finishing high school and getting an education so you can get out and take care of yourself as soon as possible.

    If you do nothing else, work hard in school and make good grades, no one can ever take your education away from you and if you can go to college and get a degree you can get a job that will support you and you can take your life anywhere you want to go.

    Best of luck sweetie and post here whenever you need to, we are here for you.


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