Why being nerdy is such a turn OFF?

Just thinking out loud. Why for many girls anything that shows that a guys is nerdy is such a turn off? Why nerdy guys are a turn off?

Could ladies post here some opnions please?

I think that in the younger years, when people care more about what their peers think of them, that being nerdy is an even bigger turn off. OMG if they knew that I was going out with that nerdy guy what would they think.. etc.

As you get older and grow into yourself better what was once nerdy and weird may become attractive. The once nerdy person may be seen as smart and respectible, and that would be a turn on.

As for being nerdy being a turn off if you think about it, would you be attracted to a extremely nerdy girl?

My BF is the biggest nerd... I love him. Girls grow out of that, and the ones that don't and always go for the bad boy/cool kid end up getting hurt later on. Keep being a nerd.

I think that in the younger years, when people care more about what their peers think of them, that being nerdy is an even bigger turn off.

 

As for being nerdy being a turn off if you think about it, would you be attracted to a extremely nerdy girl?

 

Lets first look at a nerd.

A nerd is...

1. One whose IQ exceeds his weight

2. An individual persecuted for his superior skills or intellect, most often by people who fear and envy him.

3. A person who is intensely interested in a particular hobby or topic.

4. An 'individual', i.e. a person who does not conform to society's beliefs that all people should follow trends and do what their peers do. Often highly intelligent but socially rejected because of their obesssion with a given subject, usually computers.

 

If she like her hobby a lot, this would not bother me. This quality alone doesnt not say anything. So yes, I would be attracted to a nerdy girl why not?

 

Just to clarify.. do you see a nerd as sombody who

"who does not conform to society's beliefs that all people should follow trends and do what their peers do" or who obsessed with a hobby?

If the latter, why is ti bad to like your hobby a lot?

Depends.

Think about it...

A general definition of a "nerd" would be a low-self esteem person who looks bad and knows nothing but the computer screen.

It is more of a lifestyle thing.

I know plenty of people who are into the "nerdy" things and have tons of confidence & great charistma.

Another thing: ANYONE who thinks less of you because of the fact that you are into things such as video games, programming or collectable cards, are not worth a second of your time.

I'll have to agree with justagirl20f. My boyfriend is such a nerd, and I love him to pieces.

Not all girls feel nerds are a turn-off. But the ones that do will become mature and grow out of it.

And I'm sure that there's a nerdy girl for every nerdy guy.

A general definition of a "nerd" would be a low-self esteem person who looks bad and knows nothing but the computer screen.

 

Another thing: ANYONE who thinks less of you because of the fact that you are into things such as video games, programming or collectable cards, are not worth a second of your time.

So why would say..my hobby of reading philosophy\psychology book be such a turn off by itself? She doesnt know me yet, about once I say I have such a hobby.. thats it. Is it that scary?

Does it imply that such a person is boring?

My boyfriend is such a nerd, and I love him to pieces.

Not all girls feel nerds are a turn-off. But the ones that do will become mature and grow out of it.

Ok, I see you point.

But why nerdiness in guys in general is such a turn off?

So, in Science one day before we done an experiment, I overheard the two nerdy guys in my class talking:

"I just love mixing Hydrogen Oxide with Magnesium, don't you?"

(Okay, they were the only two chemical things I could think up, it was something else, but anyway that isn't the point.)

Enough said. Okay, so there are different types of nerds.. I suppose those two were the extreme. There are nerds who like collectible cards / comic books / video games etc who ARE cute (seth cohen! -snug- x33) but I think the reason its a bit of a turn off is because.. hmm. I don't know, really.. it just seems a bit childish?

To Azure 12: Yes, I would definitely date a nerdy girl, I am a huge computer geek myself...I program in more than one language, do network admin, run my own FTP, modified my operating system quite a bit, and I'm about to start dual booting linux.

If I could find a girl who was a computer geek as well, someone who (like I said in another post) would go "Cool let me see" when I tell them my code just compiled first try, I'd think I had died and gone to heaven

To me there is nothing more attractive than a girl who is a computer geek, unfortunately, they seem to be very few and very far between.

My ex-bf was a nerd, in that he looked like a nerd, talked like a nerd, and acted like a nerd. Why the hell I went out with him I don't know. I guess I thought he was smart, but most of it was just an inflated ego. I respect guys that are smart, confident, and have other interests besides studying 24/7 (i.e. care about their looks as well.) I think I was just underconfident about my looks, never having a bf and chose someone who really was a step below in that department.

But now I at least know what I want in a guy. I'm not going to date a nerd again (intelligence is a BIG turnon for me, but nerdiness no), and someone who's a bit more compatible in the looks dept. As a result, our sex life pretty much sucked because I wasn't physically attracted to him.

My ex-bf was a nerd, in that he looked like a nerd, talked like a nerd, and acted like a nerd. Why the hell I went out with him I don't know. I guess I thought he was smart, but most of it was just an inflated ego. I respect guys that are smart, confident, and have other interests besides studying 24/7 (i.e. care about their looks as well.)

Sparrow, Would you tell me who is a nerd for you then?

I am a bit lost.

i would find the reason to be that you have abosulutly no idea whatthey are talking about, so you cant really relate to them on any level so your brain tells you to rejectthem

My friend is a bit slower then I am, and having a higher IQ then her means that she doesn't always understand what I am saying whilst WORKING But we are still good friends (and despite the fact that we are both females and not gay, I still find this relevent.)

It's just a bit scary if people take the work with them where ever they go, or if people *do* seem a bit childish because they still like collectable pokemon cards and what not.

Isn't it like some fact that girls go for older guys based on maturity? If that's true (it's possible I'm worng) then isn't still playing didgemon (sp?) cards for 'Keepsies' a bit lame? Lol.

And for the record I personally don't reject them until they deem themselves worthy of it

Lol I always thought the nerdy sarcastic type was what girls like...LOL LOOK AT SETH COHEN FROM THE O.C....women luv him/.

Ok, let me say that I don't mind computer nerds, who are confident and cool at the same time. Confidence is the biggest turn-on for women. My ex-bf was a nerd because he was not confident, acted like he was such a big-shot (lied about his accomplishments to me or overdramatized them), and studied 24/7. In other words, he was insecure and a nerd. Not a good combination.

He also didn't really take care of himself. Some weeks I remember (before I was dating him) he just wouldn't shave at all, and would waer the nerdiest grandma-type sweaters. Then he'd have the nerve to complain about *my* style (when I used to model in high school!) I then realized that he wanted me to wear clothes that would make me look less good so he wouldn't feel so insecure in comparison (i.e. he didn't want me to wear short shorts, because all the guys would stare at me in the library, etc. so he would always make sure he put his shoulder around me...ugh.) Anyway, I suppose I don't have a good memory of my ex, but he was my first boyfriend and I was a bit new on the dating scene myself so whatever...

Nerds who are cool and social/confident are my type I guess (nerds here simply meaning intelligent guys...) I like having stimulating conversations about philosophy and physics, that's a good type of 'nerdy'. But nerdy, insecure guys who are about a 2/10 on the attractievness scale are not.

I think nerd doesn't really describe any group of people specifically. I understand what the stereotype presents, however, I don't really see it that way. I often call myself a nerd.

I am certainly not against an intelligent man. If intelligence makes him a "nerd", hey! Im all for it.

Lol I always thought the nerdy sarcastic type was what girls like...LOL LOOK AT SETH COHEN FROM THE O.C....women luv him/

Yeah, but it helps that hes really good looking, too. (curly hair!

i would find the reason to be that you have abosulutly no idea whatthey are talking about, so you cant really relate to them on any level so your brain tells you to rejectthem

Yeah, I really didn't have a clue what they were talking about. The whole thing was explained up on the board, but no, I just didnt have a clue what they were saying.

And no, although I can't relate to nerds, that wasn't the reason why my 'brain was telling me to reject them'. The fact that they're both 2 years younger than me, not attractive in any way and one of them keeps asking me in some gay little voice if i'm his friend is why my brain is telling me to reject them.

I believe what they were referring to was Dihydrogen oxide (also known as water) and Magnesium, which produces a rather violent exothermic reaction.

Maybe, I dunno. We all basically went outside, chucked some powdery stuff into an ice cream container and ran away, it exploded, set the plastic container and the grass on fire and we had to go stomp it out.. ah, the good old days.

Ok, let me say that I don't mind computer nerds, who are confident and cool at the same time. Confidence is the biggest turn-on for women. My ex-bf was a nerd because he was not confident, acted like he was such a big-shot (lied about his accomplishments to me or overdramatized them), and studied 24/7. In other words, he was insecure and a nerd. Not a good combination.

 

He also didn't really take care of himself. Some weeks I remember (before I was dating him) he just wouldn't shave at all, and would waer the nerdiest grandma-type sweaters. Then he'd have the nerve to complain about *my* style (when I used to model in high school!)

Sparrow, What I got from you post for women it is extremely important that a guy wear stylish clothes. Otherwise he is kinda nerd.

Why clothes is so important at all?

Sparrow, What I got from you post for women it is extremely important that a guy wear stylish clothes. Otherwise he is kinda nerd.

Why clothes is so important at all?

Beacuse for alot of people clothes reflect their personality...and grandma knitted jumpers, parrachoote pants and the like (using a guy i know for example) doesn't give you a very good first impression

Sparrow, What I got from you post for women it is extremely important that a guy wear stylish clothes. Otherwise he is kinda nerd.

Why clothes is so important at all?

Because suspenders SO aren't a good look.

I think nerd doesn't really describe any group of people specifically. I understand what the stereotype presents, however, I don't really see it that way. I often call myself a nerd.

 

I am certainly not against an intelligent man. If intelligence makes him a "nerd", hey! Im all for it.

Ok, we have 2 parts of a nerd:

1. He is into his hobby a lot (computers or stamp doesn matter)

2. He doesnt care much about being styling.

So what is the turn off? 1 or 2?

Ok, we have 2 parts of a nerd:

 

1. He is into his hobby a lot (computers or stamp doesn matter)

2. He doesnt care much about being styling.

 

So what is the turn off? 1 or 2?

If you are overly interested in something (as in overly interested) then it doesn't really seem like you have much time for anything (or anyone) else in your life! That's a huge turn off, because it's like feeling that tech decks give the guy more excietment then him seeing your face, or spending time with you.

And if he doesn't care much about styling then in our media-influenced world he might not be found attractive physically. And to be in love you need to be attracted to all aspects of a person. However one woman's trash is another one's treasure so, it's all personal prefrence.

Hi, I just want to comment on something earlier on.

To Azure 12: Yes, I would definitely date a nerdy girl, I am a huge computer geek myself...I program in more than one language, do network admin, run my own FTP, modified my operating system quite a bit, and I'm about to start dual booting linux.

 

If I could find a girl who was a computer geek as well, someone who (like I said in another post) would go "Cool let me see" when I tell them my code just compiled first try, I'd think I had died and gone to heaven

 

To me there is nothing more attractive than a girl who is a computer geek, unfortunately, they seem to be very few and very far between.

My ex was a nerd too and he really liked talking about me in front of his friends who have non nerdy gf's. He's really proud that if we go to the mall and see a computer game store, I would drag him in instead of him dragging me.

As for compiling... usually I end up having to debug my ex' code more often than he debugging mine...

I thought corny was cool