What to talk about with the guy I like

[LockerBunny]

Hey,

 

I've been falling for a friend of mine for a while now and I haven't yet told him how I feel. I think maybe he's started to get feelings too and it freaks me out a little bit in a good way?

 

Anyway, we're kind of friends with benefits at the moment, but I want to know how to progress this forward if there is something there. Sometimes I'm so used to talking in a sexual way to him that I have no idea what else to talk about.. I have pretty bad social anxiety so sometimes when I think about changing the subject or talking about how I really feel it freaks me out and I just keep talking about dirty stuff with him -.- even though I can tell he genuinely wants to speak to me and know how I'm doing

 

So what is normal to talk about when you have feelings for someone and what is too much when you're just sussing out if they have feelings for you too? I really don't want to blow this opportunity with this guy because I think he's amazing and I feel like there's something there. I know he's not that much of a "ladies man" so I know he gets insecure about this kind of thing too.. I just don't want to let this go because we both don't know how to move on from this sexual phase and possibly turn it into something better.. someone please help :(

[Andrina]

Talking about one subject is really boring. Talk to him about things you'd talk about with friends--what movie you've seen lately and liked, what you did on the weekend. What your goal is for a future career. If you want to be exclusive with him, tell him as much. If this scares him away, he's not the right person for you anyway. Two people have to have the same relationship goals to make it work.

 

Show him more than one dimension of yourself. If you only show one side, he'll see you as shallow and uninteresting. You sound like your self esteem needs some work. Read some Internet articles on how to build your skills in this area. Good luck.

[DanZee]

Well, you could ask him questions about what he likes, what he dislikes, talk about sports, the weather, his friends, his family, school, movies he's seen, etc. Let him talk for a while. Think about what he is telling you and ask him questions about what he just said. You can also compare what he said to your own personal experiences with likes, dislikes, friends and family. You just can't talk about sex all the time, and you already know this.

[smackie9]

How about suggesting going out on dates. I'm not talking dinner, but spending time outside the bedroom, and text him good morning, or ask him about his day. Showing an interest in him as a person is key.

[Wiseman2]

Talking isn't how you progress things forward. You start acting like you are dating by planning on doing things like people who are dating do. It sounds like you think sex is the only thing keeping him around.

we're kind of friends with benefits at the moment, but I want to know how to progress this forward if there is something there. Sometimes I'm so used to talking in a sexual way to him that I have no idea what else to talk about.

[david17]

Firstly don't be fake and let him get to know the real you. As we all know that always doing discussion on same subject becomes boring so start discussion on different topics like How's the weather, what tv series you like, favorite color, when you were born and a whole slew of things. Hope this help you!