Whatshouldid Posted March 26, 2019 Share Posted March 26, 2019 I've been in a relationship for 2 years and am still very happy in the relationship, but we both know it won't last. We are both currently in a military University and I am graduating in a year, he's graduating in two. We will be posted on different bases and our trades do not really coordinate well. He wants children, but I don't. It feels to me like we are doomed, yet meant to be together. Should I keep the relationship going until it's not possible to continue or break things off now even though I love him? I really need some advice on what you guys would do if you were me to help guide my decision. Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted March 26, 2019 Share Posted March 26, 2019 He wants children and you don't. That, to me, would be enough to just end it now. Sorry you have to go through a breakup but Either way, now or later, you are both going to hurt for a while. Link to comment
Andrina Posted March 26, 2019 Share Posted March 26, 2019 At the very point you had a discussion about major life goals, you should have broken up at that point. When one wants kids and the other doesn't, why on earth do you want to stay one second longer? Everything has to match when you're choosing a lifetime partner, and it takes a while to find someone who matches you in every important way, so don't waste time on someone who is on a totally different page in a major area. Sometimes decisions hurt but you have to do what's best for yourself. Take care. Link to comment
Bravil Posted March 26, 2019 Share Posted March 26, 2019 Not wanting children it’s an important life goal. He’s not going to not want children because you won’t. Break up now before it gets more complicated. You both can find someone on the same path Link to comment
Whatshouldid Posted March 26, 2019 Author Share Posted March 26, 2019 Thank you all for your help, it is going to hurt but you guys are right, have a great day! Link to comment
RayofLighten Posted March 26, 2019 Share Posted March 26, 2019 You're not meant to be together i'm afraid. You couldn't be more wrong for each other. Wanting different things, going different directions. That's about as incompatible as you can get. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted March 27, 2019 Share Posted March 27, 2019 I would ask him. I'd put the question to him exactly as you've put it to us, and let him be the decider of whether he's willing to invest his time in someone who won't fulfill his long range goals. Consider what and who else you both may want to focus on while you're both in this place. If you'd be cutting things off with one another for opportunities to find a better match, then that's one thing. If not, consider that you'll already hurt from a breakup, so decide whether you want to do that prematurely for no particular payoff. Link to comment
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