scarew Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 I am so annoyed and bored. A couple of old friends of ours came into town and I WAS hanging out on the deck with them, having a fake beer while they have real ones. But then because people started drinking they started smoking alot. One or two if its way accross the deck from me I don't mind, but then soon EVERYONE was smoking. It wasn't healthy so I came inside. Chances are they will be out there most of the night and I will be stuck inside where the air is clean all by myself. Sigh. Link to comment
BornToResist Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 Good for you!!! I know it sucks, but when your little one comes out perfect and healthy, you'll know it's because YOU made all the right choices! It's only 9 months anyways. Good job, I'm proud of you! Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 aw, I am sorry They should be more considerate around a pregnant woman. Link to comment
bigheart09 Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 They should be more considerate and not smoke around you. Link to comment
Siriana Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 Yes, I would acctually tell them not to smoke for a while, otherwise you'll have to leave. They're like kids..... Link to comment
scarew Posted April 7, 2007 Author Share Posted April 7, 2007 Yah, I hate being that big B**** who tells everyone not to do that. I get the feeling that my husband thinks I'm just being dramatic about it sometimes. It could just be my own paranoid banana brain though. Sometimes I'll say the smoke is bothering me or I shouldnt be around it and he kind of rolls his eyes. Today he is going golfing, another thing I can't do with my friends because I'm pregnant, and I told him to keep his phone on all day because I am having some pretty crazy Braxton higg's. I got the feeling that he thought I was just using the pregnancy as an excuse to get what I want. He was like, "(sigh). Dont worry! I will have my phone on! Man, you're funny." I am so tired of being the big B. So many people think that pregnant women are over dramatic and use pregnancy as an excuse to get people to do what they want. Its not fair. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 Does your husband smoke? I think any doctor will tell you that it is extremely bad for you, and especially harmful for your baby. I don't think you are being a big B. Link to comment
scarew Posted April 7, 2007 Author Share Posted April 7, 2007 No he quit smoking when I got pregnant. But all of our friends do, well they at least smoke cigars and stuff while they drink. I mean, they are courteous enough to do it outside but it just means I can't hang out with them out there. I am so tired of being pregnant. Its a difficult transition point. You don't actually HAVE a baby, so you can't be put into the "parent" category where people respect your space and everything, but you still have to do everything that a parent does. If you're the woman. Not fully out but not fully in. Its so difficult. Our one friend was like "Oh I might have to crash on your couch tomorrow night after the bar" and I mean, I can't say no, but for gods sakes I am 8 months pregnant! I have to pee like thirty times a night! You think I feel like having a drunk guy passed out on my couch??? If we had a newborn he wouldn't have asked. But pregnant? Well, thats just different I guess. Rant... Complain... Sorry guys. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 oh, it's ok..... rant away, that's what we are here for. Well, maybe when the baby comes, people will be more respectful of your need for space. i guess if he was planning on passing out on your couch, he didn't really care if you were going to pee 3 times a night or not. *sigh* Link to comment
BornToResist Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 That sucks, but don't worry, you're not being over dramatic. You're being a good momma!!! I remember I was 8 months pregnant on New Years and I was hanging out outside too...I made sure to stay away from people who were smoking as well, but sometimes someone would come over and would smoke and I'd flat out tell them to get out of my space. It did get frustrating because it seemed like people didn't take me seriously and would blame everything I was upset about or worried about on my "hormones." That was so frustrating. Link to comment
scarew Posted April 7, 2007 Author Share Posted April 7, 2007 Ppl said that to you too hey? My friends always imply that its just my horomones and it makes me SO angry! I am just trying to protect my baby! I would be there smoking and drinking with the rest of em if it weren't for the baby! Well, tonight I am having a girls night (bridal shower for a friend) so hopefully they will be more understanding than all my guy friends. Plus not as many of this particular group smoke. I have decided to coin this phase a liminal transition. All transitions are difficult especially when they last a long time. Like people training in the military. You go in as a regular person, are depersonalized in the liminal phase for several months, then come out as a soldier. I wish I had a bunch of friends at home that were going through the EXACT same thing at the same time that I am. Well, I wouldn't really wish this on my friends. Why can't I just enjoy being pregnant? *Sigh* again... Link to comment
BornToResist Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 I think it's normal not to enjoy pregnancy around your time...you're getting close and I know towards the end of my pregnancy, I just wanted it over. Absolutely nothing could make me happy anymore, except for the thought that I was almost finished carrying around that bowling ball in my uterus. Hang in there sweety. You're doing the right things. Have fun tonight! I think girls definently are more caring and understanding about that sort of stuff. Link to comment
Siriana Posted April 8, 2007 Share Posted April 8, 2007 I've never been pregnant, but I guess this is a part of your situation. You're 21. The majority of people who are 21 (your friends are that age, right?) don't have the maturity to be a parent. If they were older I am shure they would understand! When you're pregnant that counts as you already had a baby! You are mature enough to know it. They aren't - but just wait - one day they'll be in your situation and oh...how the tables will be turned.... feel free to be a btich..after you gave birth - sacrifices are much bigger...it's not your job to make them understand - it's your job to look your own best interest. Also it is normal not to have your drunk friend sleep on your couch, it's normal not to be around cigarets(and IMHO when you have a kid it's irresponsible to smoke), it's normal when you're 8 months pregnant that your housband has a mobile on non stop .... All in all you're right. Link to comment
scarew Posted April 8, 2007 Author Share Posted April 8, 2007 Syrix and Btr, you're always on my side, thanks. The girls night was nice, although I still ran into alot of the same problems (smoking). I am the first one out of my friends, and J is the first one out of his friends, to (plan to) have a baby and start to settle. So I guess you're right syrix, they're time will come. Probably sooner now that everyone sees us doing it actually. Everyone is jealous and it gives them a reality check that they aren't actually THAT young anymore (my husband is 26 and so are all of his friends) and that they can't party every day for the rest of their lives. Link to comment
Siriana Posted April 8, 2007 Share Posted April 8, 2007 Definitely. I am 26 now (in few moths 27) and just 2 years ago from all the people I know no one was married. Now, I heard about at least two soon to be weddings amongst these people (we're all the same age) and my best friend got married 2 years ago.. So two years ago when we were finishing uni it seemed so far away...and now looks like soon it's going to be who isn't married, not who is getting married! You feel somewhat threatened. I don't want to get married yet...but you keep wondering how the hell these people managed to find the one in those two years?!... And saturday night is not what it used to be anymore.....a lot of kids are out now....probably my age when I was at the beginning of uni.... Link to comment
Dilly Posted April 9, 2007 Share Posted April 9, 2007 Addagirl, Scarew, keep it up!!! Proud of you! Link to comment
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