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What does it mean ?


cristina2011

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So, I hooked up with this guy two years ago and were just friends. It was just that one day and we constantly were texting each other and eventually I started to catch feelings. The only thing was that I didn’t know if he had feelings for me and I never wanted to ask him. We wouldn’t hang out only when he would come over at my bestfriends place and I will be there. I stopped texting him because I just didn’t want to catch more feelings and end up being hurt. When we see each other he always flirts with me and tries to be next to me but I try not to because I know I have feelings for him and I don’t think he wants the same. I feel like he only wants to hook up and that’s it. The weird thing is that when I told my bestfriend that I was going to go on a date he heard and he got jealous well I think because he told me if the guy was cuter then him, that why I’m I going for ? It confuses me!

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It's a testosterone thing. Nothing special. You'll see it more as you date more men. If he doesn't date you or ask you out or treat you like a lady, don't fall for it. You've got feelings for him so don't settle. Flirt with him and enjoy your friendship. Don't sleep with him and date men who are interested in you - you as in your entire person.

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Have you told him that you are interested, but will not be treated as a mere hook-up?

 

It's amazing what a bit of clear communication can achieve, as opposed to over-analysing actions that may well not mean what you guess they might.

 

The weird thing is that when I told my bestfriend that I was going to go on a date he heard and he got jealous

 

That is only weird because you have made assumptions about his motives that exhibit confirmation bias. Plug in some different assumptions and have another think about it.

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So, I hooked up with this guy two years ago and were just friends. It was just that one day and we constantly were texting each other and eventually I started to catch feelings. The only thing was that I didn’t know if he had feelings for me and I never wanted to ask him. We wouldn’t hang out only when he would come over at my bestfriends place and I will be there. I stopped texting him because I just didn’t want to catch more feelings and end up being hurt. When we see each other he always flirts with me and tries to be next to me but I try not to because I know I have feelings for him and I don’t think he wants the same. I feel like he only wants to hook up and that’s it. The weird thing is that when I told my bestfriend that I was going to go on a date he heard and he got jealous well I think because he told me if the guy was cuter then him, that why I’m I going for ? It confuses me!

 

Are you confused about your bestie being jealous? Or about hookup boy making passes at you?

I think you should ask yourself what YOU are happy about. Regardless of what you think the intentions are with hookup boy, does his actions make you happy? What do YOU want? Is he going to give you what YOU want?

 

If you suspect it's a no, then you need to decide: Do you like the feeling of flirting around and having fun without any hang ups? Or, if you want more and he doesn't want to deliver, than decide whether you can be around him.

 

Trust me, there's TONS of other fun, great people to make friends with. You don't need to keep hanging onto someone if it's not really going to make you feel at peace.

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