k1k1
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Post here instead of contacting your ex!
k1k1 replied to Nynnja's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
I really want to break NC. I want to hope you have changed and seen the error of your ways but that is ing stupid. Nobody changes. I dont even know why I feel like this today. I had a dream about you. That sucked. It ruined my day. You can make me feel better but only if you say the right words. Even so, everything would still be a huge struggle afterwards. There really is no point in pining for you and I don't know why I still do it. I just want to feel better. F*ck you -
Post here instead of contacting your ex!
k1k1 replied to Nynnja's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
You know how I feel towards you. You said you would call me, that we could have it like before. Why is it still me who calls you? Why don't you talk to me anymore? I can still feel the wall is up -
Too late. sent a voicemail. At least that anxiety feeling iv been getting all day is gone
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i am having a MAJOR relapse right now. Perhaps I shall call tonight.
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Sundays are the worst. I think its day 15 today.
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Well Im not really sure. I guess I feel okay. I was feeling a bit down, which is the real reason I sent that message though.
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Im breaking it. Just messaged "good luck tonight" as she is MCing a concert, which she hasnt done before.
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Day 7 AM Well I just had a dream about her. (and someone else) I was going out with someone else, (new relationship etc) and she looked so similar to my ex. (although I know she looks different IRL). We were having a good relationship but I think I still missed my ex, because one day I bumped into her and I think we started going out again. I was then dating both of them at the same time, and felt guilty. Anyway, just a random thought, as Iv never dreamt of her like this before. On the plus side, those night sweats are gone, and I did get a proper sleep.
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Day6 - still no response from her Well tonight I was looking at getting a new car. I remember when she said to me once "They day you get a new car is the day I leave you". And that morning I decided to sell the car, and by coincidence, I was dumped that night. Well, been doing a bit of research online and its put my mind off her alot. I have all access to her emails, facebook bank accounts etc (I have all her passwords). Tempted to take a look at them as I feel so great tonight. In fact, Im in quite a healed mood tonight - because Iv been car shopping sort of.. But I wont. In fact as Im typing this those feelings are starting to come back I dont feel like I want to heal and just forget about it. I was contemplating just calling her up and going "lets just be friends"
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Day 5 Well, it was all going good today. I had an exam and it seemed like I did well. Usually after and exam I would call her and let her know, especially if I was in a happy mood. I didnt get to do that today, and felt really hurt.
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Yes, though I do worry that she has someone else, and this is all a waste of time. I certainly feel like im healing though. I mean today I hardly thought about her
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day 4 - im checking this forum way too much. Got loads of exams to study for. I think Im still clinging onto hope
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Day 2 for me. - wow, it seems like ages Today, work was hard. We work at the same place (different branches). But I just couldnt concentrate all day. I wake up with night sweats. I do feel better now though. Hopefully, studying gets my mind off things
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Day 1 Today- Yesterday, I left the ball in her court and told her that if she wanted to get back, she could call me. We broke up about 2.5 weeks ago. It was quite painful yesterday night. If I talk more about it, its a bit better though.