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intolerable

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  1. I still miss you sometimes, and there are moments when I want you back. I'm starting to doubt my love to you, though. Because I don't want you to be happy. I want you to suffer. Suffer and regret for ever leaving me after I fought so much for you. I tried not to hate you... I really did. But what you did after the break up... who you were after it... you gave me all the reasons to hate you. I now realize how different we are. We always were. Your friends vs. mine. We tried to make it work, they tried to make it work, but in the end water just can't mix with oil. I was a fool to have actually thought you were different. All you can see is your effort. You never saw mine. "Don't act like I didn't fight for you. I did. Hard, and for a long time. So please, forgive me if now that we're over, I'm exhausted." - Blair Waldorf
  2. NC is hard yes, but what made it easier for me was I kept thinking that I'm doing this for my sake. Because when my ex left our relationship, he was thinking of himself. It's about time I thought of myself too.
  3. I can't even remember what day it is anymore. It's been more than 4 months. My ex PM-ed me again the other day, asking if I was finish with some schoolwork. I didn't reply, my friends stopped me by pulling the plug of my computer. I love them. I really don't understand why he's trying to contact me all of a sudden. Maybe he wants to be friends, or maybe he just wants attention. I don't know. What I do know is that him contacting me is not good for me.
  4. I have two of my friends get back together, their guy's reason being "they fell out of love". But a few months later got back together and they're still together now.
  5. Same here. I don't even want to contact him anymore, but I think of him everyday. AND it's been 4 months already. o_O Is there any way out of this insanity?
  6. Day 8 It's been 4 months since the break-up. I saw him in school today (we pretty much have the same classes), but today was different. For some reason, I keep running into him and I'm sure it's just a coincidence. I don't know why, but I'm sure it's not good for me. I still want him back terribly and I miss him so much, but I know he doesn't care anymore. I don't know why, but I don't want to let go because I feel like there's still something between us... something that's beyond words, something that only my heart can understand. And the sad reality is that I can't just walk away.. but I can't stay either. Oh God, help me.
  7. Day 6 I saw him last night since a mutual friend celebrated his birthday. I didn't talk to him at all, I guess we just pretended not to know each other. I still find it extremely awkward and I'm unsure how to act around him.
  8. Oh wait, I haven't been NC for 3 months. My ex dropped me a text last Friday wherein he told me that some of my CD's are still with him and he asked when he should bring it. It's his first text ever since the break up (almost 4 months ago) and I actually found it odd. I replied 2 days later. So, today is my day 3 I guess. I still miss him, think of him everyday, and wish I could just turn back time. But heck, I'm also enjoying my life and meeting amazing people. XD
  9. I'm new here! I've been in NC with my ex for more than 3 months now! Although it's not absolute NC since we have the same classes together (pure torture I tell you). Can I join?
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