I have been in a relationship for almost 2 years and have EXACTLY the same problem. We have talked and talked about it and he says he will try to be more often, but he is always "Tired" etc. I have done so much of the initiation as Mercutio suggested but end up feeling rejected etc when he still denies me. The whole thing has wreaked havoc on my self-esteem etc., but I keep reminding myself, its not me, its something in him that does not want it, or does not feel adequate. Apparently this is a very common problem, and short of initiating or encouraging him to feel better about himself there isnt anything you can do. If you ever find anything, please let ME KNOW too