manup7228

Dont know the day exactly but 4 or 5 weeks since ive heard or seen from her. I was so tempted to unblock her on facebook and check it out but my head told me no and i listened. I think that is making progress. Anyways, I still miss her alot and dont think she is going to contact me for a very long time, but i think my sadness is more a result of my insecurities more than anything else.

Robert, you are very inspirational. Your going to keep me going with NC. I am on like week 2 (i do not like to count days), but it's nice to see someone "man" enough to not fall for their Ex's dirty little games. My ex is doing the same thing by the way. The whole still texting me while they have a boyfriend. She's on her second one since me and we were together 2 and half years. We've only been broken up 5 months. Sadly, I know it will all coming crashing down on her eventually, I just hope she does not think I am going to be the one to pick up the pieces.

2 week-ish mark. Its been somewhere around 2 weeks since I last made contact with my ex. And the only reason I had done it that time was to tell her happy birthday. She's on her second bf since me, kind of weird, never pictured her turning into this easy, "get around" girl, but whatever, its her life. You know, I guess because it's xmas I am feeling a little down. Mainly, because I just can't believe she didn't realize how much I loved her and how she will NEVER find that kind of compassion again. I just wanted her to love me back but she wanted "experience" in dating. It sucks. It truly does seem like at this age, (late teens and early 20s), that the nicer the guy, the more cruel the girlfriend. I have a close group of friends and we all love the * * * * out of each other. We could hang out everyday. We're very loyal, loving, sensitive, and honest with everyone we meet. Most people consider us to be alot of fun. Three of my friends (me included) got dumped this summer from long term relationships (2+ years). Every girl cited "experience" as their reasons for dissolution. Its just a joke. Like I am sorry, but I have seen this "grass is greener" and "experience" * * * * way too often. Ya, I would like some experience too i suppose, but I loved her to death and would have had her be the only girl I've had sex with my whole life and still been the happiest guy in the world. Sorry for the tangent, just lately, I have been bottled up and needed to vent. No Contact is going great though. I have blocked her on facebook and all her friends. I don't care if she thinks I am immature, or being too cold to her. She deserves it. When you break up with someone then 2 weeks later are in another relationship, you can't tell me I cannot justify my actions. I thought for a while there I wanted her back, but now I just wish she would never talk to me again, and she could just be a bittersweet memory. For all you complaining about how much you would give to just have your ex give you any sort of contact, I say be careful what you wish for. Getting strung along makes you feel like one of the most degrading people. I am now at the point where I wish she would just catch the hint that I am not going to play her games, and if she wants me back, she could at least break up with her boyfriend first and apologize. Anyways, sorry for the long post, I can now get on to a funfilled Christmas Eve now that I got this ALL of my chest. Merry Christmas everyone, and stay strong with no contact!

Day 5 Wow. Its Day 5 already. This is going really fast. Not too bad now. I still think about her all the time, probably too much, but then I put my head on straight and realize that even if she came back I wouldn't accept her. I also noticed that when I do think about her, its not really painful, just sad. I was amazing to her, and I know she'll never find a guy that made her feel like I do. My only problem is she is running through men like crazy. One relationship after another. But I attribute that to her being insecure about dumping me and the fact that she has few GOOD friends so she needs a boy to latch onto. Its whatever. She screwed up. She'll realize it one day. I doubt she'll come back because she will never swallow her pride and admit she made a mistake. But I have to move on either way, which I am doing.

Day 3 Fought the urge to respond to my ex after I gave her birthday wishes. She got all mushy on me and told me how she misses me all the time and thinks about me all the time. I know its a bunch of bull though because she has a new boyfriend now and if she truly did have those feelings she would be back with me. Anyways, this isn't about trying to be friends, trying to get her back, or trying to be anything in her life at all really; it's about me trying to find myself again. I feel I am on the right track and feel that I must go NC if I want to be able to do this. If she feels that me ignoring her means that I am being immature and a jerk to her than so be it. This is not about her anymore, its about ME. I am now ready to take back my life and my heart and give it to someone much more deserving in the future. I can do this!

Day 2, Great Day! 2 nights ago was my ex's birthday, I had been no contact for 6 weeks prior to that, i felt it was just wrong to have someone so important in my life not get a happy bday from me, the funny thing was that i sent it one day late just to send a msg that i dont really care that much, and ive come to the realization that I dont! The only problem is now shes telling me all this pish posh about how she sat by her phone all day waiting for me to tell her happy birthday and how she thinks about me all the time, i didnt respond. Apparently i have reopened Pandora's box tho caz today she sent me another msg asking how i was doing and asking if its hard to not think about her caz she supposedly thinks about me all the time. OH YA, btw, she currently has a boyfriend. The whole situation is messed up but i found out that i really dont care. I am not responding to anything she says to me. I feel if she truly wants me back shell get the courage to swallow her pride and either A) Come to my Doorstep or B) call me and leave me a voicemail. And quite frankly, if she doesnt do either of those, Ill still be fine with everything, she broke my heart, but at least I had a heart to break : ) ....

December 9, 2008, DAY 1 of No Contact, fitting because its a day after my ex's birthday... I am going to do this, and I am not going to let myself down this time, time to man up!