Jump to content

nutbrownhare

Platinum Member
  • Posts

    7,881
  • Joined

  • Days Won

    14

nutbrownhare last won the day on May 14 2019

nutbrownhare had the most liked content!

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

nutbrownhare's Achievements

Veteran

Veteran (13/14)

  • First Post
  • Collaborator
  • Posting Machine Rare
  • Conversation Starter
  • Week One Done

Recent Badges

762

Reputation

  1. Dear... You are a hypocritical, snivelling . Not only were you 'economical with the truth' about the amount of contact you have with your poor ex, but it transpires that your caring role ended purely because you stopped being paid for it. Not just by HM Government, but by her. And the only reason you are hanging on in there now is because you hope to collect on her life insurance when the brain tumour finally kills her. I know she keeps threatening to cut you out of her will and, actually, I hope she does. Hanging on in there, even though you really wouldn't like it if your current partner was in a similar situation. Hanging on in there, but proclaiming yourself to be single - like you did when we were notionally still together. You announced to the world that you were single almost a fortnight before you announced it to me! What a hero! I'm glad I spotted the fact that you wanted to glom onto the social life that I've painstakingly built up in the two years I've been in a strange town, and didn't introduce you to too many people. You are too lazy to do this for yourself - despite the fact that you've lived in this town all your life - because the best way to meet people round here (as I discovered by accident) is to involve yourself in community projects. I'm glad I hid the fact that, despite having had two very lean months when we were together, I'm not badly off financially. I did notice your remark 'Y'know, if I'd realised you were that skint - I wouldn't have bothered!' But then, given your total lack of scruples re your ex, and the 'Bank of Mum and Dad', I'm not really surprised. It would have been nice if you'd gained a bit more self-reliance by the age of 50. And now you're advertising yourself as having 'been single too long'... I'm sure you'll continue to proclaim yourself a 'Nice Guy', whilst having no concept of passive aggression. I'm aware that your obstructiveness in returning the last of my belongings from your flat, and denying that you'll be around later when I could just come and collect, is part of your general modus operandi and nothing to do with me. I'm also aware that the searing rage that I'm feeling is par for the course, too, and I'm just using it to energise myself in other areas. And I'm sure that I'm not the only person who could cheerfully flatten you.
  2. Dear **** You ended the relationship a couple of days before Christmas, when I had no job, no home, no support network in this area and having disposed of many of my possessions to be with you. I have picked myself up and maintained my dignity. In fact, this has been one of the best things that has ever happened to me. I am still troubled by the way you want to hold on to my possessions, though, the total lack of help, the way you'll sit there watching television while I'm struggling with heavy boxes of books, all that... but then that tells me the sort of guy you are, and that I'm better off without you. But now you've emailed me to say that I seem to have taken some of your printer paper, and a cheese grater. You're due to go on holiday to Malta in a couple of hours time, and you're emailing about a cheese grater. You've even had a rant to your brother because I hadn't replied (I hadn't seen it). Jeez. I did think about further exploring the juxtaposition of those objects, though. Don't you own a shredder?
  3. When I was in my teens and twenties, I used to have total strangers coming up to me and telling me that I was the most beautiful girl they'd seen in a very long time etc etc etc. However, I was very screwed up emotionally, and attracted some real b******s of blokes. One thing that I discovered about many beautiful, vain men was that they had zero personality. Not all, though! These days I'd say that chemistry, personality, sense of humour and interests in common are far more of a turn-on than looks. I still get hit on by good-looking fellas, but looks alone are nowhere near enough. I'd guess that most men would feel the same about women who look gorgeous ... and have nothing else to offer.
  4. I agree that if you're longing for a partner to make your life complete, it may come over as desperate and act as a turn-off. But people who live life to the full, whether or not they're in a relationship, have good friends, meaningful activities etc are likely to be attractive (regardless of how they look!). This is not at all the same thing as sitting around idly letting life pass you by, so the instructions 'You have to put yourself out there' and 'You find love when you're not looking' are not actually contradictory. If you put yourself out there looking desperate because you're not complete without a partner, you're also less likely to make good choices.
  5. It doesn't actually sound as though you are suffering from the kind of mental illness for which inpatient care would be helpful. You may well find that therapy would be helpful, though, as it sounds as though your pain goes way, way deeper than just grieving from a short relationship. People who are grieving DO get admitted to mental health hospitals if they're suicidal, but, to be honest, it's not the best place for people in this predicament. It gives a bit of 'time out', but in many ways can be more disturbing than just carrying on with your life.
  6. Well done you! It can't have been easy, giving up all that lot! As Swingfox says, though, you'll probably find in time that you'll mix with a different crowd. I personally find that going dancing - I do several different types - gives me a high, without putting all that stuff into my body. I used to do a lot of acting, as well, which is superb fun because you get an adrenalin rush when you perform - again, without putting anything into your body. With both these activities you need to have your wits about you. If you exercise at all, you very quickly notice the benefits of not smoking and drinking. Hope this helps!
  7. No, we didn't talk every day - we are both very busy people who would be out most nights during the week, so we made time when we knew we would both be in, and spend around an hour on the phone. It wasn't the distance that broke us up, but a combination of things.
  8. I had a LDR which lasted for 8 years - and we're still friends, two years after the split. Compared to some on here, though, it wasn't all that long distance (1 1/2 hrs by car). We did it by scheduling time when we would speak each week, come hell or high water, and getting together most weekends. The things you need, IMHO, are lots of trust and interests in common. This meant that we had a lot to share when we did get together - we're both very keen on dancing, for example, and doing practical things. But, yes, they can certainly work!
×
×
  • Create New...