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lostandhurt

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lostandhurt last won the day on October 8 2023

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About lostandhurt

  • Birthday 02/07/1964

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  1. Thanks I really appreciate that. I do really like her and we seem to be a pretty good match on most things. Of course time will tell but I am enjoying her company and how all this is making me feel. Lost
  2. I am not sure and a little confused. She did mention once when we were kissing "I see what you are doing there" and said "There will be plenty of time for that later once we know each other better" Time will tell Lost
  3. Update: I have to admit that this is going well but not like any dating situation I have ever been in before. She made it clear right up front she wants to go slow with no sex until we are a serious couple. I told her I am totally fine with going slow and in fact it is helpful for me being a guy because when we see a woman naked and have sex our brains go all mushy and can easily ignore red flags hitting us in the face. The reason this is different is because I have been down this road plenty of times only to have the woman trying to get into my pants not long after we agree to go slow and I end up being the voice of reason. I have even had women get mad at me for stopping things from going to far. This woman seems to be very careful not to let things get anywhere close to that. Kissing for example is still very non passionate which has me a little concerned, not a lot but a little. I love kissing and we have kissed but I would not call it passionately. I asked her if she likes kissing and she said yes, I also asked her if she enjoys sex and she said yes so I have to take her at her word. I am not all about sex but it is an important part of a relationship. I kind of feel like she is holding back because if she lets herself go farther it will go all the way. I have no problem waiting and it is kind of fun this way and feels good. So she asked me out on a date and then asked me to spend the night and made it clear NO SEX which I accepted. It was a new one for me but we had a great time, slept in the same bed with her cuddled up against me most of the night. She has made it clear she is not seeing nor talking to anyone else and sees us as a couple, very new couple but a couple. I did something thoughtful for her and she asked me if I was real. I brought her flowers on our third date and she told me she has 3 things she looks for. A man that is good to his mom, a good father and the first guy that brings her flowers is the one. She knows how much I love my adoptive mom and the love, struggles and work my son and I have shared and the flowers were icing on the cake. Just being me for once seems to have paid off. Dating very attractive women has pitted me against flashy shallow guys with serious game and I often lose out to them but not this time for now. Funny thing is she has mentioned all the guys she met then passed on were those same type... Lost
  4. Yes I checked on her to see how she slept, texted a little during the day. Later when I got home I texted her to see how her day went how she was feeling.... We talked on the phone a little over an hour in the evening as well. Lost
  5. I hid my profile yesterday afternoon. I didn't mention it to her nor do I plan on mentioning it, this is solely for me. It felt good hiding it for some reason... Lost
  6. Thanks. I only know how to be who I am, I don't do fake or try to sweep someone off their feet where they think I am one type of person only to change later. Lost
  7. Update from the date: I picked her up and she asked if we could keep the date light as she wasn't feeling 100% which of course I offered to cancel or just go relax and talk but she insisted. We explored an area of old town I know very well and then stopped in for an early dinner. When we got back to her house she invited me in and we sat on the patio and talked for hours, then moved to the couch cuddled and talked more. The date was about 8 1/2 hours and went by quickly. When we were driving I told her straight out that if this date and our connections continues to grow I plan on hiding my profile on the site. I made it clear that I was doing it for me as I see her as very special and I don't want any distractions why I get to know her and what she does or doesn't do in that regard is totally her choice. She thanked me for being upfront about it and then I simply went on to a different subject. She has mentioned several times she is very happy she met me and I reciprocated. I can only control what I do and how I feel, be my true self getting to know her more and more. If it all ends it wasn't for lack of trying on my part. She did ask if it was okay if we could not plan any dates for a few days while she rebuilds her strength and feels better so we shall see how things go in a few days. I will keep you posted Lost
  8. True. I answer questions if asked but I don't volunteer information. I am really secure and confident so I didn't feel like these other men were a threat. If she chooses someone else it is her choice, I will be my genuine self throughout regardless. It didn't feel like it was a test or trying to make me jealous or something plus I did happen to see his face and I am way better looking than he is if I do say so myself. Lost
  9. Divorced 16 years, moved here 5 months ago. Has met several men from online dating (she is extremely attractive and gets a lot of attention) and was actively talking to two guys I think when I came along. Lost
  10. I mention something I read in their profile and then follow it with a question which gives them an easy response and gets the ball rolling. I do have a pretty high response rate so it works for me. I am messaging women 45 to 65 not 24 yr olds so I couldn't imagine sending a message "whats up" "Sup" or just "Hi" I keep them short, genuine and fun. I do agree when someone really likes your look and profile they will respond unless your message makes you seem like a total D-Bag. Lost
  11. I asked her specifically why she didn't put her actual age on her profile (she looks 45) and she said because she didn't want to deal with a bunch of old guys messaging her. I just laughed and told her that will not stop them, she smiled and said you are right. I told her you will have 24 yr olds to 74 yr old messaging you and she looked at me like how do you know that. I am a guy, I know how we think. The funny thing is I was relieved when she was closer to my age for some reason. You do enough online dating and you understand it can be very difficult for people to portray themselves factually. For women and men they have to put down their body type. I don't know how many profiles I have seen where it says "Athletic" and they are not even close to athletic and are 20+ pounds over weight. You can kid yourself day to day but when you have to own it on a dating profile it is not so easy. She copted to it really fast so I gave her a pass. Lost
  12. This woman from POF is 55 years old but her profile said 50. Very early on when we were texting after the phone call she came clean that she is 55, not 50. Not a huge deal but I did ask her if her pictures were current which she immediately sent me a picture from days earlier. I thanked her for being honest as it is very important to me. She texted me about 10:30 this morning, I replied and her next text she told me she cancelled the date with that other guy. We talked on the phone a bit later and set up a date for tomorrow. She is new to the area so I will show her around a bit, visit some shops and play it by ear I think ending with some dinner. It is looking promising. Thanks for all the support Lost
  13. Thanks, been busy with life and not making it a big deal meeting someone. They are out there and patience seems to have paid off for now. Lost
  14. Thanks, She asked me if I was really 60 because she thought I was much younger. Not sure why someone would add to their age on a profile. She did add that I was the oldest guy she has met so far but I looked younger than they looked. Lost
  15. Yes I did, she thought it was funny. Who knows my planned clever message may have not worked but Hi did. Guys that just send Hi or Hows it going or all those other lame messages are lazy. I always include something from their profile except this one time and it worked so go figure. Lost
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