Angel_325

Nothing in partially. Just talked to people and all of them remember except me. Makes me feel a bit odd that I don't remember either.

Hi all. I am a female in my late 30s and can't remember my first kiss or first time. I know I had them with my "first love" at 26 but that's all I remember. No details. Is it because it happened when I was older? I've never met anyone else who forgot. I know neither of those memories were particularly special, but I'm surprised I can't recall.

I talked about this with him and he has made plans to introduce me. When asked why it hasn't happened then why the hesitation, the response was that this was all very new to him and that now that he is in his thirties he has to take things more seriously and consider more things. I'm guessing that the previous introductions didn't really have serious implication but now he feels probably that they may and not having had anyone for so long made him very nervous and want to take things slow. He said that he loves me and he does want the future with me and has made plans to introduce me to his family and friends but I still have a lot of stuff to consider based on everything else in the relationship. He is immature and this situation is more evidence of that

I invited him to my birthday party which would have many of my friends and possibly my parents there as well he didn't come because it was all women and he felt a bit uncomfortable and overwhelmed meeting everybody all at once and he thought that it would take away from the party if he was the only guy there. We are meeting one of my friends individually in a couple of days. He took me out for lunch separately for my bday and got me a card and small gift.

Yes, the fact that he lives with his parents was a concern for me from the beginning but he does have a pretty good job. He doesn't make as much money as me but he could definitely afford to live on his own. However, he helps his family pay some of the mortgage expenses as the family seems to need a little bit of help. He also believes it's a good way to save money as what he's paying at home is much less than what he would pay elsewhere. This I could actually understand. As far as why I decided to be exclusive, he seemed to want to take the relationship to the next level and I was the one who initially brought it up, and he said he was ready for it but did admit to be nervous just because it was so new to him. He gets nervous easily and I think he sometimes gets into his head probably due to life experiences and just his personality. Recently, he hasn't really been that nervous about the relationship and has expressed confidence in how he feels about it and the potential that it has.

We've been together for a bit over 4 months and the person is his step grandmother. They have a very bad relationship. He did casually mention to me that if I wanted to come over and meet his dad and brother while she was out of town with his mom, I could do that. This is in a couple of weeks. I think he's building up to it perhaps?

Thanks everyone for your opinions and perspectives. I think one thing I need to do is reflect on the relationship itself, as mentioned by some of you, but also upon thinking about it further I think some of the reasons he may want to wait to introduce me are the following. 1. He hasn't been in a relationship in a decade and this is all very new to him so there may be some hesitation there. He tends to get nervous about this probably due to lack of ling term relationship experience and things that seem to not work out for him. I wonder if this is the biggest reason why he hesitates to introduce me to his friends 2. When we first met he wanted to keep things casual at first but ended up really liking me after a couple of months so we became official. The fact that things moved quicker that he then he anticipated or wanted may also instill some sort of nervousness or fear in him. He felt very weird and nervous when we became official even though he was willing to take that step because it's been so long. 3. He has a somewhat complicated family situation with a relative who resides with them at the moment and even though she lives in a different part of the house, there's some issues there and he doesn't want her to see me because she may say bad things. His parents also don't go out much other than daily chores since covid . I don't think this issue was there with his family in his previous relationships. 4. His parents know about me because I know for a fact that he discussed me with his mom and I know she has expressed a little bit of discomfort about the age difference and while he doesn't care about the age difference, in the back of his head that might be something that he's thinking about when it comes to introducing me even to his friends 5. He said his friends are like family to him. He also hangs out with his friends maybe twice a month so perhaps he just wants to spend time with them alone for now because he hasn't have a chance to see them very often. Just thoughts 6. He didn't tell his friends he was dating me until we were together for nearly two months and he only started telling his friends once I started asking if his friends knew about me. I think he used to be a little bit more open when he was younger but in recent years has become more closed off and even more private so that may be why he was more willing to introduce somebody sooner in the past. Also, I would imagine his past experience shapes how he views relationships now and in the past if things didn't work out he may be more hesitant to move quickly.

I feel like he wants to introduce me but there's something holding him back. I don't know exactly what it is. I know in the recent years he's had certain family issues and there's a particular person in his family that he feels uncomfortable with so then maybe a factor, and he doesn't see his friends as often as he used to but every time I've brought up him introducing me to his friends at least, he says yes but then when he actually has plans with his friends never invites me. He says it's because he wants to figure out a way to do it where we go grab a smoothie or something that doesn't involve alcohol since I don't drink and that would be more comfortable for everybody involved. Usually when they meet they go to a local pub near his house and have some food and drinks. He is 8.5 years younger than myself and some of his friends are a year or two younger than him. He doesn't drink very much just at Social Gatherings a couple of times per months when he goes out with his friends. I do wonder if his family dynamics and the fact that he doesn't see his friends very often, and the fact that I'm over 8 years older than him is causing some hesitation for him because it is quite an age difference? The strange thing is that he says he feels more comfortable with me than he's ever felt with anybody before, and I can tell that it's true because he has shared things with me that he has never shared with even some of his friends that are very personal, and he's an extremely private person. So that's why it's so odd for me that he's sending me all these signals that he really likes me and wants to be with me but at the same time there's a hesitation to introduce me to his Circle and I wonder if it's the age difference or the fact that he's just much more cautious now than he used to be in his younger days.

To everyone who responded that there are red flags, I do understand and I have thought about it. But I've also tried to be understanding in that he hasn't been in a relationship in a long time and he actually initially wasn't looking for anything serious but when he met me he started liking me and because things were going well we became official after less than 2 months. He is extremely private and didn't tell his friends he had a girlfriend until after we became official, and not immediately after, but he didn't tell all his friends just a couple of them. He is not even very active on social media for privacy reasons. I also am trying to be understanding in that the way one approaches relationships when they're 20 is probably going to be different than the way they approach relationships at 32 so if he introduced a girl quickly to his family when he was 20 it doesn't mean that he would move as quickly at 32, even though he said he really likes me, which I believe. But I still feel weird about it but not sure if it's more me than anything.

Yes, I know for a fact that some of his friends know about me because I have heard him speak on the phone with his friends that picked him up from my place telling them that he was at his girlfriend's place. But I know he hesitated to tell his friends because he's very private as the relationship was very new. His last relationship was in his early twenties and it only lasted 2 months however he introduced the girl to his family. He is 32 now. I know he has a relatively recent family situation involving his grandmother that has caused them some anguish so I wonder if that may be a contributing factor to why he hesitates to introduce me to his family. He's also much younger than me so I wonder if he has a concern about me being able to get along with his friends as usually when they go out they go drinking but I don't drink. He is saying that he's making plans to introduce me to his friends and I think it will happen in the near future but I think he needs more time. It just makes me feel uncomfortable that it's taking him much longer with me than it has taken him in the past.

Yes, this is the same man but he has since stopped talking about past crushes as much as he realized that it was causing insecurities. I suggested meeting some of his friends and he said yes but then when he actually met a friend or two he didn't invite me to come along, though he said it's because he wanted me to meet all of them at once not one by one individually.

Hi all, I would like to get your opinions. Would you feel weird if your boyfriend with whom you have been exclusive for 2 months still has not introduced you to any of his friends or family, even though you know he has introduced exs in the past much quicker? Let's say you've been together for about 4 months. I know that 4 months is too quickly but would you feel weird if you knew that exs were introduced after only a few weeks? His family does know about me but they have never met me and most of his friends don't know about me except for one or two good friends. Now I will say that his last relationship was years ago when he was much younger so I'm not sure if that affects anything.

He was in college more recently as he graduated when he was 25 so some of these experiences are more recent for him as he also kept in touch with many of these people until a few years ago. Now many of them are Facebook friends but he doesn't log on to Facebook very often at all.

Yes, indeed. But does bringing up this kind of stuff often mean he's not over them or is it simply just fond memories of his youthful days and innocent what ifs?

Hi all, looking for some advice. I've been dating my current boyfriend for 5 months, male 32 years old. He said he loves me and feels comfortable with me. Since we started dating he has somewhat frequently brought up girls that he used to like in the past. This usually comes out of nowhere and can be anything going back to high school days to his college days. For example he'll talk about his past crushes from those days and things that happened. Some of these girls ended up being his friends and the ones he tells me about never ended up being sexual encounters or relationships. It's almost like he's reminiscing about those days. I know he misses his college days a lot as he had a lot of fun in college. When I asked him if he still has feelings for anybody in the past he said that he does not but that he does have memories. He said he does sometimes wonder what it would have been like had he not broken up with this person or gotten together with that person. I've asked him not to talk about it so much as it makes me feel awkward and he said he will town it down, but I wonder does that mean he's not over them or somehow want a to be with them? I do want to believe that he's over it like he said he is but I wonder if he's just simply not aware that he somehow is not.