surfdog

Don't be too hard on yourself...it takes time...I was thin all my life (I got called "bone rack", "bones" and all the rest) then in my early 20's ( I'm now 31) I filled out naturally with broad shoulders and a good cut .My friends now all have beer stomachs but not me...I'm glad I was on the thin side growing up because I look better now...As far as for you, you may fill out as you get older, you could slow down your metabolism to make youself gain more weight...get the book "body for life" its informative. Good luck and be glad that you are doing something to help yourself, thats half the battle...

Help her!...those other posts saying to let her be are full of shit! Do the right thing and get her to change her ways before she gets too deep into this stuff...That is what love is all about let alone being a good person who cares about someone.

Take a look at yourself...Are you insecure in the first place? This may lead them to cheat...if you are constantly worried and questioning them about things. You could be attracting the wrong type of person too...check yourself out you may be surprised at what you find, not to say those guys were justified (not at all). Sometimes things in life can be a "self fulfilled prophecy" meaning if you can its going to happen then it probably will because you made it happen. It happened to me an I drove my gf away from me...Maybe it is a bad luck streak for you. If your self esteem is low you may attract men you are looking for someone to control (because they are insecure too) and then as a result they end up cheating on you because they may not respect you because of low self esteem on their part and yours...hope this helps.

Who needs all that stuff...just kick ass in the gym and you'll be fine...

Don't go too far down or you could hurt your back....Keep your back straight...like if you had a pole going through your mouth through your body and out your butt...KEEP YOUR BACK STRAIGHT...go down so that your knees break a 90 degree plain and keep your head up looking at the ceiling or a high point on the wall...you don't have to touch your butt to the floor, that too far...ask someone (assuming you're at a gym) for a little advise...don't worry about how much or how long you can do/go for now, give your muscles time to develop...mahlina is right biking is great for legs

Hi, Hang in there 3 weeks is not enough time to get over someone you love...It may take months...it depends on you, how long the relationship was and many other factors...go easy on yourself right now...time will heal your wounds.....

Yes that is true...push-ups are great for you...by spreading the distance between your arms (either closer together or further apart you work different muscles, chest or triceps)...diamond push-ups are a good challenge (put your hands together to form a diamond between your thumbs and index fingers)...for a real challenge try some one handed push-ups...

Signgirl, I know the feeling that both of you are in...I lost my gf of 4 yrs because I was afraid to commit...There was confrontation and hurt involved but deep love too...she gave me a bunch of chances and helped me try to get better too because she wanted to marry me...I was in (and stil am) in therapy...I messed up recently after a long break (she hoped this was the time it would work)...She couldn't take it anymore and left...I worked so hard recently to better myself to get her back (or in case she doesn't come back)...What I saying is that make sure he is better and not just saying that to get you back...I made that mistake of thinking I was better when I wasn't and it made things worse...it takes a lot of time to get better...has he gone to therapy? People do get better, I feel great but I'm without my gf...I know if I had another chance I could pull through this time...MAKE SURE HE IS BETTER...it can work...but don't rush in if he isn't ready...I'm sure he misses you...good luck...PM me if you want, I have a lot of experience in this area...(I hate to say)

Please don't.....because when things get better you will look back and say "I'm glad I'm still hear because..." Just think, things could be worse at the place you're going to if you kill yourself...then you'll suffer for ever....go get some help.....BE STRONG!

I'm curious...what did he do to make you hate him so much? How was the relationship when you were together?

Hi...sorry to hear that...I guess if you love her you can forgive her even though that is a tough thing to forgive. Have you tried therapy or even church or something spiritual. I suppose it will have to come from deep inside of you. The one thing I've learned in my life is that 99% of the answers we need come from inside our own minds...Good luck.

Hi...love hurts...I know it does...sorry to hear of your pain... I don't agree with going back to him because he is married & he has kids, that would not be good at all (especially on his part) but what is going to stop him from leaving you for someone else if the two of you did get together? What I mean is...if he did this to his wife, what would stop him from doing it again if you got married (or lived together). Take care or yourself, I'm sure you're hurting right now.

I go to the the gym or do some kind of physical activity...you feel good after you work out and you look great too...a confidence booster for sure!

Just to add on thing...we were together about 4yrs solid with a few small breakups, then 8 months off and then a few months of seeing each other...so it was over 4 yrs.......With a positive attitude you can't be beat. She is my soulmate.

Great positive attitude! I'm in the SAME situation...I was with my ex for 4yrs and it was up and down...deep love but I had some issues (trust, insecurities and "comitment phobia"). Well after a few small break ups due to my overreacting, we finally had a big break up for almost 8 months with little contact (actually for the 4 of the 8 months we had no contact). We started seeing each other again after 8 months and after about 5 meetings with her I messed up (over reaction again)...she said that was the last straw...I was (still kind of) so down BUT I have the same attitude as you now. I was in therapy for my issues back when we were together and I read tons of books on relationships (webs sites too...anything I could get my hands on). I switched therapists recently, I have been going to the gym again, bought some new clothes (for an improved look), went to church and confession (hope ex forgives me for my overreactions and accusations). I feel as though I have matured (I'm 31 yo) A LOT emotionally! I feel good, when I think of my ex I think POSITVE and if she could only see the new me...I think so much more positve now and (She fell in love with the positve me she met at first then my issues slowly worked a wedge between us)...Now, I am the person she feel in love with again (the old positive me)...I feel we will be together again because of the love we shared together....we had a whole future planned together. I know I have a handle on my issues and I know I was wrong to act the way I did towards her...Keep up the positive attitude!!!!!!!!!!! WE CAN"T BE STOPPED AND WE WILL BE WITH THEM AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!