mushmouth

For all those just starting, please stay committed. I had the love of my life walk out of our relationship about 3 years ago. I was devistated. I couldn't imagine not being with this person as we talked about marriage. Anyway, I went NC and got so much control over my feelings and so much insight into why the relationship was wrong and I've just stuck with NC ever since.

I've decided to not answer your email eventhough I know you want some of the things you left behind. I am officially NC. I will return your things on my schedule, not yours. If your $30 worth of items are more precious than our year together which you decided to end without any warning or discussion, I hope you get some professional help to deal with your selfishness which you always admitted to.

I just hit year 2. HA! To be honest, I did a lot of work on myself and realized I had been selling myself short with the girl who broke my heart. It was also helpful to meet women along the way that possessed real woman qualities. Anyway, just signing on for the first time in almost a year since a friend of mine who has been married for something like 11 years is going through marriage problems. I recommended the site to him and figured I should just see if it was still the same. This is a great site. Its so full of love. Thanks to everyone for putting your hearts out there and also your advice.

My two cents is GFTOW is not for every guy (or gal). After getting blindsided by the first woman I wanted to marry, I eventually was able to get aroused by other women after about 2 months. Then, I found myself sleeping with them and not being happy. Now, I am in my 11th month. I have certainly found new women to date but I have no desire to be with another woman if I can't love her as I did my ex. Clearly, that does come with time but the idea is I want to reserve myself for something special because I don't want to waste my time or anyone elses. I also believe that NOT having sex is a great way to trick the body into helping you fall for the first person who shows a spark. Since I want love, marriage and a family sooner rather than later, I can easily forgo random acts of sex.

Mr. Echo I read your string and I just wanted to say it was good to hear you say "onwards and upwards" after Blender's motivational writing. Blender gives wonderful advice and I constantly am able to recharge my battery when I read her writing. More importantly, her advice has become a little voice in my head when I need encouragement. So, if I am correct, you posted about 3-4 months ago. Feel free to let us know how you feel now and what changes you have made in your life to love yourself more.

I take things personally when I've completely screwed up and I feel its soley my fault. I just wrote a post about a great date gone bad. While my friends all laugh at how it ended (I punched a guy) the woman was shocked and ran off...probably for good. I have to admit, she could have seen it differently (read the post for details) but obviously I was out of line especially on a first date. Of course, when I do something that makes me feel good I also take that personally which is a good thing. For instance, I never would have been on that date had I not approached that woman.