Miriverwoman

You have a son, and he has feelings, too. He needs a father to spend time with him outdoors and reading to him, with him, many other things. You need to give your X space & let her go. It will be difficult, but if her mind is made up, let her go. If you love someone, set them free.... She may never return, but if she does & admits she really has seen the light & wants you forever, then you have her......love her forever.. IF NOT, ... There will be a love for you someday, and your life will go on, even if you don't think so now. If you drink, seek out an AA group. This online forum is great, also. I had a boyfriend that cut himself & threatened suicide & ihis ways did not make me love him more. In fact, I drew away ... forever. I saw him recently, after not seeing him for 25 years or so & he had changed considerably. He was with a beautiful wife (his size) & had a nice young daughter who seemed very happy. He did not recognize me or even look my way, which was fine with me. I realized years ago I did not love him & even though he said I could fall in love with him eventually & he would give me any home I desired.. I did not love him. Your X needs to go & you need to find a new life. Normally, I would say to stay for your son, but in this case, there will always be issues. I was hurt physically many times by others & even lately, but when younger & hurt.. she .. your X will not forget & forgive so easily. Your son needs to have a nice home life. My son ... wants to kill himself & is starting to play with sharp objects. I am not as young as you to get out. I am very very involved with my relationship & too much time has passed. But, he learns from his father things I do not approve. I don't believe in divorce & it is difficult. You are very young. A plus. So much more out there than you realize. You will need to educate yourself & get a college degree or find a job that will pay for your schooling. You will meet new people, especially if you open your mind to it. You will then be able to provide for your son & take him to faraway places with you, or even nearby special places & be able to afford to pay for it. Also, you will need to pay support, unless you get custody. That is usually another reason for staying .. it is cheaper to keep her... is the rule.... Before you know it.. 25 years will have passed & you will look back & hopefully be in a better state of mind & better surroundings. Hope my advice helps.

How would you like to be 94 and feeling the same way? My dad is legally blind & can't hear completely in one ear & little in the other. My mom died in 2001 & dad talks to me about killing himself every time I talk to him, which is often. He calls sometimes over 53 times a day until he can talk to me. I am only child. I wish I was 20 years old again. I now have 4 children. If you don't have any, please go to your local college & talk to someone there about enrolling. There is ways to go to college & help. You need to get more education. It will keep your mind off yourself. You will meet more people & see that your boyfriend was not the one that was forever for you. A psychic woman had to tell me to forget mine forever. That phrase still rings in my ear and hurts, but she was right. Forget him forever & go on. You need to think about your future. Especially if you are healthy you are blessed. Think of all your age that are really dying & have health problems & many other problems. YOU ARE YOUNG & so much is ahead of you. Keep an open mind & have faith. Believe in the power of prayer. I hope this helps. It sure helped me & I am more than twice your age & wish I knew what I knew now when I was your age & everyone my age will tell you that. So, listen to what us elders have to say!!!