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spearntime

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About spearntime

  • Birthday 05/12/1978

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  1. I have books of poems, but haven't done it for years I am really rusty. that's what came out of me in a few seconds. It's just how I felt at the time. Yes, I have had friends w/water signs, but not a lot of close capricorns. I get along real well with taurus too.
  2. Thank you Capricorn. Is that your sign? It's a very compatible friend sign next to my sign: virgo.
  3. Single white flower petals fall you can feel them on your skin our bodies sensitive to the touch Feel more so with the heart. our hearts need love Soft flower petals falling Falling and telling us That we are loved. Softly.
  4. I understand what you are saying. I have seen some improvements over the years. It does improve. Very very slowly. Thing is, she is mostly now just overbearing with mannerisms and her care for others. I think my role is to help my family if possible. I wonder if there's something I can do to improve her life. I feel that would bring closure. I know I may be caught up in a child's fantasy to have her mother back. I am just not sure if that is the case or not. Nice to know someone else can relate, as well.
  5. Guess my brother and sister have the same belief I do. My other two sibl. also get a lot of money from my mother on a regular basis. They would miss the money if they let go of her.
  6. There are some good things. She has times when she treats my child very well. I have a belief that children should know all of their family. My siblings and I always go to my mother's for the holidays. If I leave her out, I leave out aunts and uncles and cousins.
  7. Hi everbody! I am new to this site. I have a question of concern regarding my mother. I have been in a mostly parentless situation since I was young. My father passed away when I was young and my mother was always gone. I would see her very rarely and when I did, she clearly did not want to be around my siblings and I. We were very clearly an "inconvenience". My older sister and I always took care of my little brother everyday while she was gone until very late in the evening. According to things my father said, I am not even sure my younger brother is his child. My little brother looks and acts differently from my sister and I. My father's loss was absolutely heartbreaking because he always made sure we had enough and protected me from my mother. She would become very emotionally abusive. It did get physical a few times, but that was rare. We were bought necessities but were mostly neglected. Many times, it was hard to find something to eat in the house. We lived in an upscale neighborhood, but none of the neighbors seemed to even notice our situation. She always had something to eat for herself, but us kids rarely had a rounded meal. She always had a very "all me or nothing" attitude. Now I am an adult and I have a child of my own. I have tried everything to have a relationship with my mother. She has accepted the invitation, but clearly considers anything else more important than spending time with my child or myself. Every time we speak, she constantly finds something negative to complain about. Even though I speak to her about talking about positive things, she continues the same behavior. I feel that I am put as second most of the time. She brags about spending time with my siblings who live closer to her than I do. She drops hints that they are better than I am and she likes them more. Yet my siblings have similar complaints as I do. It gets worse. When I DO visit (and I am always the one who does), she has a hard time just offering common courtesy to me. She does not make it a point to adhere to our schedule and seems to just constantly think of only herself and what she wants. This is how it has always been, but now that I am an adult it is almost intolerable. There are two cats in her house that urinate all over the house. She has brand new carpet that is almost mult-colored in different areas because of a lack of neutering or taking care of behavioral issues with the animals. There is a disregard to other people's needs all the time with her. This is the case with everything from our schedule to what we will eat. There have been times when she has acted so inappropriately that I have had to leave because of yelling, name calling, etc... She has horrible, horrilbe social and table manners. She has always been loud, obnoxious, ill mannered... but lately she has even started belching loudly in front of people. She does not seem to understand how inappropriate this is! She does not dress appropriately meaning she wears stained or old clothing and seems to not care at all about common courtesy of others. She will stand in someone's way for a long time and not even noticed unless I point it out. This happens many times when we go out! She is a very educated woman. She holds a PhD among other degrees. I do not understand her crude behavior. I do not understand her selfish ways. I am at a loss as to how to deal with a mess in her house, a mess in her behavior, a mess in herself. A mess in me... Has anyone dealt with a similar issue? How did you develope strategies to deal with the stress? With an exterior viewpiont, does anyone have ideas for me so I can address these issues? Your input will be greatly considered and is greatly needed.
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