Jump to content

ruby19

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    132

  • Joined

About ruby19

  • Birthday 07/19/1972

ruby19's Achievements

Contributor

Contributor (5/14)

  • First Post
  • Collaborator
  • Conversation Starter
  • Week One Done
  • One Month Later

Recent Badges

1

Reputation

  1. ruby19
    Day 35. Hadn't heard from him in over a week, thought he was getting the message. Then his sister sends a whole bunch of people including me some pictures from a charity race his whole family has been running in for years...and the new horse, I mean girlfriend is in the pictures too. Guess she has joined the family tradition. Super, I'm so glad to learn that. His sister is a complete idiot so I might just be on her old distribution list for other pictures she sent from when the ex and I were dating but I don't know if he was behind it or not. And I hate wondering about it. I suck I'm in really bad shape but trying my best.
  2. ruby19
    It's Alien City with my ex. I know everyone is on their best behaviour when they first start dating someone because you want to impress them and get them to like you. And time goes on and your imperfections and fobiles start to show - we all have them, we're all human. To me, that is when the relationship starts, when reality kicks in. And that's great, because you have to love a person and accept their human faults all for a relationship to work. However, the alien is a differennt phenomenon. Total personality and behaviour changes, doing the opposite of what they used to do and becoming everything they claimed to abhor. * * * is that?
  3. ruby19
    First I had sad dreams and nightmares, than I had a phase where he came back and I launched him. The last few nights I've had dreams where it was just a normal day with him like when we were dating, no particular memory but how we would spend a typical Saturday or something. In the dream I go to sleep next to him at night and I wake up in reality and he isn't there..it's very disconcerting and sad I kind of miss the nightmares and over the top fantasy dreams, these reality seeming ones suck big time ](*,)
  4. ruby19
    Congrats! Sounds like you are doing awesome. Your post has helped me a lot as well, a big bookmark for you. As for feeling apathetic, I think that is only natural. After all the emotional highs and lows from a breakup, changing jobs etc. I can totally see where you just need to go on a even keel for awhile to get through things. Your happiness and zest for life will return but it make take some baby steps to get there. Great post
  5. ruby19
    I don't know how they do it either, make all these long term sounding plans and tell you they love you and then drop the bomb. Some kind of heart defect (i.e. they don't have one) I suspect. Just so selfish and so self-absorbed. Take care of yourself, and know you are the better person because of your sincerity. They'll get theirs.
  6. ruby19
    Ignore it. You won't feel better getting in touch with him at this point. Hang in there.
  7. ruby19
    Day 28, ex is really at me "we have to talk about ways I can make it easier for you to work together again." All I want to say is PFO with the holier than thou, sanctimonius crap and go hang out with your horse, I mean girlfriend. Is it bad I'm getting a lot of satisfaction that I think the silence on my end is driving him nuts? Must be in a vengeful stage. Not sure if the NC is healing. I was feeling positive last week, but the last few days have been bad.](*,)
  8. ruby19
    1) Careless 2) Book smart, but completely emotionally unintelligent 3) Selfish, self-centred, self-absorbed - never considers anything beyond what is best for him and doesn't realize it at all! 4) Twists everything around and lies to himself to get through things, then propogates the lie to other people. 5) The biggest hypocrite I've ever met 6) Smoked too much weed 7) Cheater and a liar 8) Snobby 9) Violent when drunk 10) Immature but thinks he is very mature 11) Does not realize or appreciate how easy he has had things in life from a family/financial opportunity standpoint, thinks everything should be handed to him on a silver platter and life should be a cakewalk 12) Refusal to do any kind of work on relationships if it might cause any pain or serious discussion or will be inconvenient for him.
  9. ruby19
    I so hear you Spikespiegel; they are lying to the person they break up with, and in my case the new girl as well so I can't really have a problem with her. Great way to start and end relationships The biggest lie though is to themselves, I really don't understand how my ex could look himself in the mirror or live with himself after critizicing similar behaviour in his sister and friends but meanwhile turn out to be the exact same way. But then I've started hearing the revisionist version of our relationship from him and what he told other people and he has totally twisted everything into a total distortion of the truth. He wants to look like a good guy, especially to himself so he has fabricated this whole situation. I think that is what cheaters must have to do, unless they are totally subhuman, they have to live such a lie they start to believe it themselves. We're better off without them but it still hurts a lot. And I feel so dumb for not seeing it when we were together, but I'd rather be a person whose fault is they trust people too much and believe what they are being told is the truth rather than a pathetic liar and user. The karma bus has come around and flattened a few previous boyfriends of mine who did similar stuff. Hoepfully your ex will get a dose of it herself and learn to treat people better.
  10. ruby19
    Day 21..he wants to talk about ways to make things "easier" for me for when he comes back to work in my department. Like * * * can he do to make things easier except not come back?? A major apology and acknowledgement of al the things he did to hurt me would be start but nothing can make better the way he treated me. I'm holding onto NC until he physically is back in my office and I have to talk to him and then I'm going strictly professional and all work related. This will be a * * * *ty summer
  11. ruby19
    That's rough, your stituation sounds very similar to mine. Got a big noble speech about how we just weren't right for each other blah blah when it turns out he has a new person he was ready to move onto. I'd say your ex is trying to get your attention, but I don't know her motivations. Could be just trying to build up her ego, or she could genuinely miss you and want you to notice her so you start talking again. Hard to say. The breaking up with another guy in the building has merit, or is your part of the building a lot nicer or is there construction or anything going on where she normally sits on the other side of the building?
  12. ruby19
    Day 20 he emailed again and sounds sad. "Hey where are you?" And the big sympathy ploy "I hurt my foot on vacation." Which I knew via the grapevine, he was drunk and jumped off a wall or some such lame thing. I thought it was funny, immature and careless, whereas a little while ago I would have been worried about him. Is that progress? Still going to hell for this one I guess
  13. ruby19
    I'll be working with my ex soon too...I might even be his manager I just have to suck it up and act polite and professional I guess. Even though lots of people seem to meet and marry people they work with it didn't work out for us. Hopefully it will be better by then, because I really like my job and dread the thought of having to hate going to work everyday.
  14. ruby19
    Oh, I'm jelly too and very upset. My witty remarks are what I strive to be feeling but it isn't that easy. Forcing myself to stay away from the computer, the phone and my BlackBerry is painful. I have to end this BS though, he's proven to be a really selfish person since the breakup and not worth my time, energy or love
  15. ruby19
    Day 12 I think...though he did email to let me know his vacation, "with the guys, I told you I went with X guyfriend and Y guyfriend, right" was fun. Glad to know that (not) Go away. Can't wait to see what happens when he starts to ask why I'm not answering back
×
×
  • Create New...