ashleyyy

Thank you once again for the reply. I agree with you on the basis for friendship part, I actually think that this we were a lot like best friends atehr than lovers in some aspects. I am not a 100% sure if a real friendship is possible at this point, but I am willing to see if it is, give it a test run, because I have not had a chnce to do so yet. Also, I know that he will understand if I need more time, so no presure there. If I notice "slipping," I will talk to him and stop tring to be friends too soon. I think that I will call him tonight/tomorrow and arrange for us to hang out, especially since I will have 3 hours of free time by his house on Friday while waiting on a friend (it's pretty far from where I live). Any advice on the best things to do? We have many common interests so I will choose something, but wanted to get some input just in case. Thank you!

Thanks for the post friscodj! We have known each other for 8 years, weren't very close before (friends, but didn't know how much we had in common), started dating in September. At the end of Dec., he told me that he isn't feeling the "chemistry" between us and that this isn't working as a relationship. As for the depth, it didn't get too involved, it was short, but meant a lot to me. We really got alog well, had fun, bonded, found out how much we have in common, got very comfortable etc. As for your question about him analyzing etc....I don't think he thinks about that at all, doesn't analyze like I did this one things he said. Thank you for pointing that out to me, I thought that I was doing better at not dissecting this, since this is the first thing I have really dissected, but I need to stop that. Also, he has made steps to hang out before, I had to turn down, so I think that maybe it's my turn now? If I saw him happy with someone else, I would smile, and hope that I find that eventually as well. I can't make him love me, tried that one other time, failed, and learned. Hope this kind of cleared up the situation. Thank you for the help!!

The man I was with broke up with me in the end of December. We are on good terms, ended things in a nice way. We have talked a couple of times on the phone since and I have seen him once. The last time we talked was about 3 weeks ago (he called to ask me about some things he knew I had that day), it was a nice, friendly conversation. At the end, he had to go, and when we were saying bye, he said: "Bye, until I hear from you." His tone of voice was nice... So, do you think that it's ok for me to call, or do you think I should leave him alone? I would really like to talk to him as friends, but don't want to seem like I am clingy after the break up. Also, I would like to meet with him to talk/hang out, but I'm afraid of how he might take that. Any advice would be helpful. Thak you.

Do you prefer to be kissing during sex in a position that allows it, or would you rather just focus on the sex itself? I find it very sweet when the two are combined and I loooove kissing after haing sex, but would just like the know what most people think, especially men. The man I am with likes it, so I can't complain, but there is one thing that bothers me a little. Sometimes after sex, he will not want to kiss me...is that just a sign he might be worn out? Or is it a deeper issue? Thanks for answering!

Thanks for the replies! What do people think of the first time holding hands, after a lot of physical contact has occurred? Is it a sign of caring, or not?

I was going to suggest flowers...maybe consider that? Good luck by the way! I'm sure you'll do just fine!!

I don't know if this it too "weird", but I think that maybe some home made dessert would be a good idea, that is if yoyu're meeting them during dinner.

She's my German friend. She's a psychology major, with a concentration in biopsych. Too bad it's not in the US, I would so take it!

Hey! My friend is doing a research project on affection for a human sexuality class and talking to her has made me think about this issue and I have a question. Which do you think shows greater committment/caring/liking/love? If a man holds his hand on your waist when walking side by side or when he holds your hand?? Why do you think so? Also, does the first time holding hands/waist have a significant meaning? Thank you for the replies!

Wow, this indeed is a great analogy! When I read that, I realized that this guys is renting, that he is past the " staying the night" stage. The way that he acts, alks, and cares,makes me want to make him feel like I feel when I'm in his company. Thank you for this analogy!

Well, he makes me feel loved and wonderful for sure, whatever it is that we do. You are very right. I think that I just realized that this is an issue I have from the past. This is the first time that I'm feeling thes things, that I feel loved by someone other than y ex...and I guess that it's a feeling that I want to be sure of. You're right though...I analyzed out "relationship" and maybe I should just let it be, grow etc? Thank you!!

Daco and Beec, thanks for the advice! I like to think that things will progress naturally as well. Would it be ok to have to talk to kind of see where he thinks this is heading, not exactl a commintment talk, bu more to see what I can expect? Or, are there actions of his I should be on the lookout for? Sorry about all these questions, but after a long failed relationship, I want to be sure that this time, it will be better for both the people involved.

Hey, thanks for the reply! I think that I'll talk to him today, it's not that I would be uncomfortable talking to him about that, but that I didn't know how things usually progress, esp. in the US, baing from a different culture and never really having been dating. You have a good point about not confirming exclusivity, I need to be sure that he's working towards being exclusive, for pure emotional reasons. I had the health ones checked out before sleeping with him.

Thanks for the reply. Do most people voice those thoughts, or is moving into the bf/gf stage kind of an unspoken thing? I mean, will he voice these thoughts?

How do people usually go from dating/seeing each other to being bf/gf? I don't have much experience with this, so please read and help if you can. I am currently seeing a wonderful new man, funny, responsible, caring, intelligent, and sincere. We have seeing each other since September (moveis, bars, dancing, and of course just chilling at home). I've known him for a few years before this, so he's not a random person. Things are going very well, it seems like both of us are enjoying each other. We recently had sex, I lost my virginity to him last week. He was very caring and made that first time way special, plus made sure that the next times were just as nice. For me, making out and sex are very emotional, and I'm happy that I waited to lose my virginity to him, since we both feel so good together. He's told me that he too, places a lot of emotional value on sex, and it was sooo visible in his actions. I am just wondering if I should be expecting to be asked to be in a relationship, or do most people not ask that, and just let thing happen, or is there so "talk"???? I'm asking because I'm definitely falling for him, and I'm scared that if he's not planning on a relationship, I might not be able to catch myslef in time. Thanks for your help!