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aboynamedmoose

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  1. aboynamedmoose
    I lost 27 pounds and just about lost my appetite completely. This happened in a span of 2 1/2 months. I wanted to lose some weight anyway, even when I was happy, but I think I've lost too much and would like to put on about 10 pounds of muscle. I've started to get a complex because everyone keeps telling me how skinny I am like it's a bad thing. I used to smoke a little during the day and thats increased to about a pack a day, which I consider as just an emotional crutch until I'm happy again. That and the depression is probably why I lost all the weight. I never had a problem sleeping and had no problems going to bed, but when I wake up now in the early hours of the morning I can't go back to sleep, where as I never had a problem with that before. I even got on anti depressants. Heart ache sucks and in my opinion emotional pain like a heart ache is 10 times worse than any physical pain. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
  2. aboynamedmoose
    Yeah, I told him not to bring me up unless she asked. And if she does to not volunteer too much info, to keep me aloof and mysterious, but talk me up if possible.
  3. aboynamedmoose
    Just found out today that my best friend has a class at college with the ex. He said that he didn't even bring me up but my ex asked about me. The ex asked if I'd found a roomate because she knows I bought a house recently, and inquired about the payments. She also told him that her and the guy she was seeing since we split were no longer together (I already knew that but figured they might have gotten back together) We've been broken up for 3 months now and I went no contact exactly 3 weeks ago because she called the same best friend and told him to tell me to leave her alone. He also told her that I felt bad about everything that happened since we broke up and I was confused and was getting mixed signals. (I did all the chasing, crying, flowers, emailing, letters, etc.) I can't help but think this set me back with the NC. What do you guys think. And I can't help but think she told him about her and that guy splitting up because she knew that he would tell me that. I was getting better and now I feel like I'm right back to square one!
  4. aboynamedmoose
    Well the new guy is supposedly out of the picture according to a mutual friend. This was told to me two weeks ago, I know a lot could have happened in the mean time. But the mutual friend referred to the new guy as a band aid and even the ex supposedly told him she wasn't 100% whole yet. And it's been 3 months since the breakup and I have made all sorts of changes for myself, lost weight, working out, pretty much eliminated drinking, gone to church, gone to counseling. All of which the ex knows about. She's even seen me a couple times since and commented on how good I looked. So like I said, i figured i'd give it 2-3 more weeks of no contact and send a short email, nothing about us or the relationship, if I get no reply then I know its time to move on. If she replies then it could possibly be the start of email correspondance which could hopefully evolve into something more. Only time will tell.
  5. aboynamedmoose
    It's been 2 weeks of no contact what so ever. I did see a mutual friend of the ex last saturday, i talked to her and didn't mention the ex once though. The following day on Sunday I saw the ex online for about 5-10 minutes on AIM and didn't say a word, I finally signed off before her and signed right back on seconds later and she was gone, can't help but think she was waiting for me to say something. Anyway, I saw 5 racoons in a tree in my backyard this morning and took a pic and emailed it to 6 people including her. The email was basically a couple sentences about what I found in my backyard this morning. I know she already read it and didn't expect her to respond. I'm hoping she's wondering if I included her intentionally or accidentally. Anyway, I really don't consider that contact because it's not about us or the relationship and she may be thinking it was an accident. My plan is to wait 2-3 weeks and send her a short email asking about school and how she's doing and if she watched the new fall shows coming up that we used to watch together. Nothing heavy, just light. This idea came from a previous thread.... this situation is very similar to mine. What do you guys think?
  6. aboynamedmoose
    I don't think she'd beat down the door. We had a lot of ups and downs and I was very selfish and she put her heart on the line. She has a lot of pride and I really pushed, begged, pleaded, annoyed, etc. I can't help but think If I'd followed NC from the beginning we'd be together now. Or at least in a better position than what has come of things.
  7. aboynamedmoose
    I was just reading thru some old emails that I'd sent the ex and she sent back to me towards the beginning of our break up. She just said she wanted space and time to heal. She said she couldn't see me or talk to me because she didn't want to see me get upset or be confused. I swear she must have stumbled onto this site before me. Now 3 months later I feel that I've pushed her away forever and had the NC forced on me. If I'd just listened to her and respected her wishes. DOH!
  8. aboynamedmoose
    Damn, That's an awesome letter! I was going to ask permission to copy and paste it and send it to my ex but she forced the no contact on me. I don't know if I would send it though. Sorry if i'm not much help, just wanted you to know it was well written.
  9. aboynamedmoose
    thanks again River dog. I know there is quite an age difference between us but she was for the most part very mature when she was with me and very communicative. Except when we were both drinking, thats when we had problems. I was the one that didn't communicate. I swear she must have stumbled onto this website before I did, because she played it so cool when I broke up with her two times when we dated. And she was very sexy too. I know looks don't matter necessarily but the guy after me was so ugly, and other people confirmed that, the only thing he had on me "looks wise" was height, and that did kind of bother me with my self esteem because she is 5'9" and when she wears heels she's just as if not taller than me, but that never bothered her to my knowledge. Plus she told one of my friends that she was soooo sexually attracted to me, and all her past ex's were pretty ugly too. I don't know, like I said, the two times I've seen her since we've broken up she said I looked really good and even told a mutual friend but we're still not back together.
  10. aboynamedmoose
    Thanks again River dog, this previous thread gives me a lot of hope and I thought about waiting at least a month and possibly doing something like what was done in that thread. I know I would have to wait at least a month and I pray she calls me before that because like I said earlier, the longest I've gone with NC since we've broken up is 2 weeks, so i'm hoping she will start to really miss me after 3 or 4 weeks, but she does start back to college next week and I know she'll be busy and I'm sure the guys in her class will be hitting on her, argggghhhh. One thing though, she's only 22 and I'm 31, the new guy she was with is at least 33 or 34, maybe she's written off college guys, who knows, but it would make me feel better. Another thing is that we used to watch "the office" together and I know the new episodes start in Sept, I hope she really starts missing me then. Now you said every ex of yours has eventually contacted you, was that after NC on your part? And did they contact you to reconcile or just be friends and check up on you, or was it mixed results?
  11. aboynamedmoose
    Thanks River dog, that makes perfect sense and at this point I'm pretty much leaning towards not going. you said, "Contact, if any, must be when YOU are ready" based on everything you've read don't you think contact is 100% up to her at this point? She did tell my best friend to call me and tell her to leave her alone, and its been 13 days with no contact. Based on everything I know I can't help but think she misses me and wants to call me but she's so stubborn, i'm afraid she won't because she might think she'll look stupid because she made it clear that I need to leave her alone. I know that I CAN'T contact her, especially because of her mom mentioning the restraining order. Even though my ex told my friend that wasn't going to happen and that was just her mom worrying.
  12. aboynamedmoose
    Thanks for all the great advice. I'll know what to do with my next relationship, just hope its with her, but only time will tell. One more question. There is a good possibility that she will be out this week on Thursday at a place my friends and I frequent, we actually met there. It's been 11 days with no contact, should I go out? If I see her I would be civil, maybe smile or wink, but other than that nothing. But if she was with a guy i'd probably have to leave, but I really don't think she would be there with anyone other than her girlfriends. Just not sure if I should go because there goes the "mystery" again.
  13. aboynamedmoose
    It's very frustrating because there is not doubt she would have married, I just took her for granted and walked all over her, then realized she was the best thing that ever happened to me after she dumped me. And of course I did everything wrong, if only i'd found this website 3 months ago, DOH! I know she loves me and misses me, but I'm afraid she will never call me because she will feel like an idiot because she had to tell my friend to tell me to leave her alone. I guess only time will tell. Her b'day is in November, what about an ecard?
  14. aboynamedmoose
    iamteddybearfeelmecuddle, yes, that is supposed to be a "him" in there, sorry. Yeah, at this point I have no choice but to leave her alone, I still hope she calls me though, I thought about waiting a month at least and possibly sending an email, short and sweet, basically saying, "how are you doing, hope you are well", and thats it. What do you guys think?
  15. aboynamedmoose
    My ex called my best friend 11 days ago and told her that he needed to tell me to leave her alone. They had a long talk and she was starting to get concerned and claimed some other people were too. Supposedly her mom was eating lunch with her one day and she got a lot of text messages from me. The ex told my friend that her mom had mentioned a restraining order but the ex told him that she was just concerned and that would never happen, her mom just worries a lot. I don't understand, I never drove by her house, I never threatened her, I did write countless letters and emails basically telling her how much I loved her, and for the most part other than a few sporadic emails and phone calls, left her alone with the exception of the last days when I sent her maybe 7 text messages and called her a couple times. We've been broken up for almost 3 months and at first we talked a couple times and I brought some stuff up to her work twice, the last time of which she said I looked totally hot. And a mutual friend told me that the ex wants to call me everyday and misses me and wants to hang out but is afraid of getting hurt again. The ex even told me herself that if she hung out with me she knows we would get back together again. So now I can't help but thinking I look like a psycho stalker and since she enforced the NO CONTACT, that I've lost any control what so ever, and I do know now that I have to leave her alone. Does anyone honestly think there is any hope that she will eventually call me?
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