rr88

A while back I met a woman at this volunteering group that we were both going to. It was all quite laid back and outdoorsy, it was a good way to meet new people who enjoy hiking and the outdoors. Neither of us go very regularly to it anymore but we started hanging out occasionally just the two of us. We've been on a couple walks around the park and out for a couple of meals. I'm quite happy being friends with her, but I'm also quite attracted to her. I've always felt like we've been merely 'just friends' though mainly because she is absolutely stunning – I'd have thought a woman like her was way outta my league and that she probably just sees me as a really 'trustworthy friend' rather than relationship material. But I also wonder if its a good sign that she's happy meeting me 1-on-1, even if it is mostly me who suggests it... and there's also sometimes several weeks between us meeting. I've also found in recent years that some surprisingly-attractive women have showed an interest in me, which makes me wonder if I'm more attractive that I realised... I can still be a little shy around women though Would it be an idea to just message her and just be really clear about it? e.g. saying that I find her attractive and wondered if she'd like to go on a date? Should I also point out that I wouldn't want it to ruin our friendship if she didn't feel the same way?

Thanks for all the replies, it's reassuring to see I'm not the only one in this position. I may have painted a bit of a bad picture of them in my OP... they're not *that* bad really, but some of the words of some of them (my parents included) made it clear that they are so disappointed with me being single and it's put me off going to family parties for life because I know what will be going through their heads. They've not said anything about it in years but that makes no difference as far as I'm concerned Perhaps there is that chance that I could meet new people / women if I did go, but I feel it's pretty unlikely and I already have ways of doing that through my hobbies and social life currently.

I'm a 34M and, the older I get, the more I avoid family gatherings. I'm happy going to anything that is about my immediate family, but I find other relatives (cousins, aunties / uncles) increasingly difficult. I've always been seen by family & relatives as being quite childish for never having been in a serious relationship... and *everyone* except for me is married and has kids, all my cousins do and I feel like the odd one out. I moved to another city and haven't been to a family gathering in years (unless its for my parents or sisters). Recently my cousin invited me to her wedding and I can't bear the thought of going. To make matters worse there'll be a few people from my school there who never used to particularly like me when I was younger (because I was shy / quiet). Would it be wrong to simply RSVP 'no'? I feel bad but, I doubt it'd be a massive loss to my cousin either TBH