TeeDee

You absolutely do not deserve the hurt or the pain. You are a good person, especially for taking care of your mom. Can you get any sort of respite care so you can get out of the house some? You need things to distract you from him.

No it's not. If that is your definition of good you have issues. Get counseling. Any aggressive or meanspirited unwelcome touching is abusive.

You need to get out of this relationship. Going forward if you are not open to sexual activity NEVER get in bed with somebody. I am not victim shaming or blaming. I am trying to infuse some prevention & common sense. That will avoid things like this.

I would hope not. I am concerned about the other guy who seems to have a comment about everything concerning you & this woman.

Stop talking to work colleagues about this. There is no need to drag half the office into your interactions. If you are going to date a colleague, discretion is required. Go on this outing with this woman you fancy & her friend. See what happens. That is the only way you will know for sure.

You got your answer. He wasn't as invested in you as you hoped. Deep down you knew that was the case which is why you avoided speaking to him. "Testing" someone is usually a bad idea. Your friend who suggested it is the blind leading the blind; she doesn't know much more about healthy mature relationships than you do. Be wary of her advice in the future but also trust your instincts. You knew something was off. Have enough faith in yourself to address issues directly with words.

The word "exclusive" is not magic like abracadabra. You spoke words that mean the same thing. You already had the conversation. No need to press / clarify at this point. Let each other's actions at the wedding speak for themselves. IMO it is important to have the conversation. Exclusivity is not assumed nor does it arise. It's a verbal contract where both parties agree to see only each other. You did this with synonyms.

Don't be surprised if the other girl is her friend who likes you. If that is the case, once she tries to fix you up, she will never date you because at that point it would be disloyal to her friend.

She made the handholding comment to use humor to defuse an otherwise awkward situation. She has no interest in escalating. If she is talking about setting you up with her friend that is a neon sign telling you that she does not see you as a potential romance partner.

He shouldn't do anything. He made a decision to be done with her. Granted he was trying to wake her up to her abandonment / endangerment of his cats but she can't see that. So if she's having a major crisis like being in the hospital, he can model good behavior by caring for her dog but other than that he gets to ignore her going forward. Just because she is old doesn't mean she grew wise or kind.

Don't be terrified. The only think that happened is you presently don't have a BF. You are still you. You have your education. You have your friends & family. It will be different. Change can be scary but you will be OK. I wasn't much of a reader around break ups. Read things that make you feel better. If that is Marcus Aurelius, so be it. Do keep active especially when you don't want to. Go outside at least once per day. Keep up with your studies. Take a walk. Go to the gym. Surround yourself with positive & supportive friends & family.

He's not gaslighting you. He's outright lying to you. You are gaslighting yourself, making excuses & trying hard to make this not true. Let's look at what you do know: 1. He lied about going to the club. 2. He may have kissed another woman while there 3. He got blackout drunk which could indicate a serious problem 4 He deliberately hid another woman's phone # in his phone under a false name 5. He is gaslighting you about why he did that. Her "nickname" is not his friend's name. 6. He must think you are an idiot or a fool if you will believe such an obvious lie. 7. He wants to party & you don't 8. All his friends cheat; it's their culture. Birds of a feather. . You know you need to end this. It just hurts & it sucks. But the reality is this relationship is done. There is no coming back from this especially because he doesn't want to. If you stay all you are going to get are more lies

I wanted to but back then the event for my demographic kept getting cancelled & rescheduled because not enough men signed up. Why do you ask?

If you can scrape together a few bucks perhaps hire him a life coach. If money is an issue check some coaching books out of the library. You can't find his purpose. He has to do that himself. There are guides on the internet but he has to do the exercises.

Of course you did the right thing breaking up with this woman. Her family sounds horrid & her by extension & by refusing to tell them to stop being horrible. She enabled all that rudeness. My only question is why are you questioning your decision?