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foreverblue

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  1. He has offered to take me out to dinner and tells me he loves me it's just I prefer he saves his money because he doesn't have much of it. He's goes out of his way to introduce me to his family when I'm there. When I told him that I'd probably be working at the hospital in his area once or twice a week he said his place is my second home. I'm the one who prefers to pitch in.
  2. Wait, I thought men feel earlier then women? No, I was initially not interested in him he really wanted me to go to his mc dance which I did; once I gave him the opportunity I saw he was really kind, spoke to me with honesty, sincerity and I just found him to be a genuine, kindhearted person. I do like him, but there are time I wish he would show me he desires me and reach out more instead of feeling like he already got what he wanted and now he doesn't have to try
  3. How do I know if he misses me or the stuff I do ?
  4. But then whats the difference between fleeting connection and lust? You have to build it though
  5. Then how else is a woman supposed to show care for a man?
  6. My definition of a relationship and what I want is an emotional connection and attachment. I really want him to truly miss me and feel my absence when I am not there. Which is why I help him clean his place, bring him food and take care of him. I want him to miss me
  7. I ask you respond with consideration and understanding before judgement. I've always felt a sense of disconnect and loneliness in life. Last Nov. I met a man who is a lot older than me and even though he is paying the consequences of the actions in his life (armed robbery) ex prison, 2 baby mamas; he is very kindness, consistent and provides me with emotional support. Although I am the one initiating to hang out (he doesn't have a car) he does call and tell me he misses me. However, I am starting to feel like things are not going to last due to our cultural differences (I can't go to his mc club) he's already introduced me to his family though; when we do hang out we laugh and joke around and it feels comforting to be in his arms. However, I jokingly mentioned in the car "you wont find anyone like me" after having the conversation with him about how he needed to start taking responsibility for his life instead of living on ss. he turned and said "why, do you think you are the only one?" he clarified by saying other women had taken care of him when he had his mc accident that broke his femur etc etc. I already knew going into this relationship that there was no possibility for a stable union (I dont want kids, he doesn't, financial ruin for both of us). but his comment made me feel like there our future together is short, the other thing that bothers me is that he says he loves me which I can feel the sincerity but I don't feel like he desires me for anything other than physical comfort. Please help.
  8. Maybe I'm thinking about this wrong, if so, can someone help me understand this better. In the age of apps and being ghosted several times by men, It seems like men have a true advantage in that they can have "fun" without the consequence of a heartbreak, emotional investment; while picking and choosing through women that they can "test" out, all why women have to remain calm, detached, and reserved until a man is invested in her so that she can slowly open up to him in hopes of preserving a relationship that will lead to a commitment.
  9. @catfeeder I can't thank you enough for such thoughtful responses!
  10. Thank you, we met once more after that, so a total of three times and he was blatantly disrespectful, never called me or texted me back, except to tell me he "had a good time" luckily I conserved some of my self-respect and though tempted wouldn't go all the way. Validation in the moment will lead to self-sabotage in the long run. Everyone @Batya33 @boltnrun @Wiseman2 @Kwothe28 @MissCanuck @Andrina was right, and thank you for providing the common sense knowledge that I should know at this point, but don't for whatever reason, intutively I do have that feeling of "this isnt right" but I don't articulate itself consciously into my everyday life choices.
  11. Thank you, I had the mindset that whoever reached out to me I was going to try to get to know because I didn't want to reject anyone based on superficiality. So I did talk to a few of them but he was the one that got my attention because he was attractive to me, is a hardworker and even though he is in financial problem he's not giving up
  12. This is the level of intelligence and confidence I aspire to be at
  13. I'm trying to change what I am attracted to. I don't have a relationship with my parents and both of them devalued and belittled me growing up. I have done alot of work on myself to realize that I am attracted to men who I have to do things for or nature because I feel like I don't have any worth. I'm working on it, and I am already in my early thirties I have waited a long time to get back out there and it appears not much has changed because I haven't and it's a hard and long road
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