This man (30M) and I had a casual/fwb situation for about 3 months. We both deep down knew it wouldn't go anywhere as far as commitment as we were in different places in our lives and wanted different things long term, but we really enjoyed each other's company and the sex. I was about to start my new career, and he's in hybrid grad school program that required him to go out of state for a few weeks at a time. He would come back home every month for some weeks, though, and would come see me first whenever he did. He mentioned he has no interest in marriage or commitment and admitted to being a f*boy from the beginning, said all men are cheaters, women are h*es, and not to trust anyone. So I continued to talk to other people and he was aware of this and had no issues with it. Yet, because of his sweetness, consistency, attentiveness, and what he liked to call 'lover boy' behavior, I still got caught up in our situation, got attached and caught feelings for him over time. I keep thinking about the intimacy we shared, and I truly think he wanted me to fall for him. We talked every single day, he took me on dates, he made time for me, he pursued me and seemed like he was so into me, even more so than I was in the beginning. His eyes would light up every time we saw each other. He told me he had no interest in other women while we were sleeping together, seemed to respect my hypochondria around sex, he's kissed my forehead and said I'm enough for him. He even had offered to help me with my upcoming move.
I did end up having to move to another state for work, and the last time we saw each other before my move, he flipped a switch and went completely cold and heartless on me. Said that realistically it will be too hard for him to visit me, and that if I keep texting him he'll get tempted by me and will want to hook up with any woman available around him - including his married classmates, who apparently throw themselves at him. He said I'll most likely find someone new after I move, who has more money/is more endowed which I found odd to mention given we were so attracted to each other. Then he made excuses about how he's trying to better himself and stop sleeping around, and it's best if we stop talking and move on. I thought we could keep things cordial and maybe would have naturally just let things fizzle out instead of having this dramatic break up as we weren't a couple. It hurts to be cut off so suddenly, told all these cruel things in the end, and not be able to talk to him again when I thought we had bonded to some degree.
He's also told me a former flame had called him during the holidays crying and asking why he stopped speaking with her, and that he ignored her. I don't know how to not take his sudden shift in behavior so personally and stop feeling so confused and unwanted, because he's clearly a bundle of red flags, but I'm having a hard time coping with the no contact and it's been 2 months already. Everything he's done and said to make me feel like he cared at first has been thrown out the window, and I feel so abandoned and rejected.
I've learned to not be intimate with men I'm not in a relationship with, but for some reason unfortunately, I felt a connection with him that I hadn't found in a long time. I guess I'm trying to make sense of what all transpired.