Kimbles1215

You didn’t see that one coming did you. You definitely thought I’d come running back. Hell no. I’m sticking to this, I have done for three weeks and I’m not letting a day allow me to slip back. I’m being strong, I know I will break again at some point but right now I feel empowered. I want you to find someone you can be happy with! Even though you treat me like at times. I’ve mafe my mistakes as well. Two days off work and I can breathe.

I'm struggling. So bad, got a few days off work and I'm all alone.

And again.......... we're back in contact. You're part. You came BACK to me. We are so incredibly toxic and unhealthy for each other but what's worse is we genuinely love each and care for each other unlimited amounts. I know we're both struggling, you're finding it hard to cut the contact as am I. I have my good days and my bad. I went a few days without contact and then you popped up again. I constantly block then unblock as do you. Why can't we both just cut contact? It's getting SO much easier though. I haven't mourned for a while. I feel fine actually. an 8/10? We wanted to see me last night. WHY contact me late at night when you know I have work? I know we used to enjoy spending the evenings together and would stay up till late and watch the stars together but we can't do that anymore. We are both so young A. You will find someone who can treat you right and so will I. Two people can love each other unexplainable amounts but not work as a couple. I love you but I don't think I'm in love with you any longer. It's gotten to the stage where we've tried to fight for so long and a few times it worked, most times failed and look now. I will always care for you. No matter what happens. I pray that we can be friends in the near future because you were my best friend before we were together.

You blocked me yesterday. And I’m struggling a lot today. So much. I’m bored out my friends although I mm with my friend at the pub. I want to contact you so bad but I know I shouldn’t and if I do I’m letting myself get more hurt. I want you to contact me but I know you won’t. I’m so angry and upset. Battling with myself to not contact you.

Thank you 11moreweeks... how are you handling things?

I should be angry with you, but I'm not. I'm angry at myself. I feel nothing but numbness. Is this normal?

I wish you would STOP contacting me. Do you not realise how f****** it is to have to ignore you? I either block you or ignore you. You are not giving me an easy choice right now. Me and you are TOXIC together. You infuriate me at how much you do not understand how hard it is to just let go. I know I did wrong to you but you did wrong to me too. Lets both let each other go and move on with our lives, because I do not want this to continue any longer. It is draining, physically and emotionally. The only time I'd like to speak to you is if you turned into a nicer person and decided to give things another go but that's impossible. You will never be nice like a normal boyfriend should be. I want to rant to you so bad. I told you last night I cant tell you my emotions because it makes me vulnerable and you won't stop asking how I feel and that I should tell you because you 'still' care. Bull**** . You just want the CONTROL knowing I'm weak at the moment. Don't you worry though, I'll get over this way quicker than you will. You are a good person but you have awfully nasty traits and you need help. Maybe having a skanky sh** family probably didn't help in the long run for you emotionally but I always had your side and yes I made mistakes but so did you.

I haven't even checked your social media for days and days... so proud

I've reached the stage where I'm not expecting a text or call from you. I barley even think about you during the days I'm at work... As soon as I'm home.. you pop into my mind but I block you out again. You are no good for me and I was no good for you. You think I'm weak, I'm not. I'm stronger than you think, I cut you out once and I can do it again.

I nearly text you last night, although you've blocked me on everything anyway. I was so close, so very close. I didn't know what to say, because.. well let's face it, there's no hope in hell we're getting back together. Your a narcissist, I wish you could realise that but you were too blinded by your own emotions to even value mine. I don't hate you, although I should for what you've done to me. I know you hate me, but that doesn't bother me. At least I can say I tried to fix us, you didn't even try. You constantly told me I had to prove myself although I spent weeks doing that. Anything I did didn't make you happy, you constantly put me down and complained I never loved you or cared for you. Which is total BULL****. I hope you're happy that you messed up something that could've worked. But I know I'm better off without you anyway

It’s 9:09am and I’m at work. I really feel down today. I haven’t felt like this before, I’m numb but also incredibly sad. Want this over and done with as soon as possible. I feel lost

Sorry I’m posting again. I’m sitting in bed trying to distract myself from looking at your twitter, bearing in mind you don’t tweet anyway. It’s the only form of social media I can see off yours. I just want to say that I’m sorry for the hurt I’ve caused and I hope one day you will be able to apologise for the hurt you’ve caused me. Such a shore lived relationship that had so many highs and lows, mostly good but also a lot of bad. Maybe one day we will be able to forgive and forget like you can’t now.. maybe we will be able to become close like we once were. I love you, I’m sorry and this is my goodbye.

It seems once I start typing, I can’t stop. There’s so much anguish and hurt all mixed into one I’m not too sure how I feel. I’m in bed early. The clocks have gone forward so it’s 9:46pm not 8:46pm... I wonder what your doing now. You were hoirrlbe to me at times. Put me through some serious sh**. I put up with it and always begged back but this time it was me who pulled away, blocked you Sunday and decided I’d had enough after arguing all day. You ignored me all morning because your were ‘tired’ what boyfriend does that? Do you think that was ok? I was only saying I miss you and want to see you. You couldn’t even reply, so I said to you ‘don’t bother replying’ and you reply ‘ok’. How can you be that ignorant. It was always YOUR way or NO way. You never quite understood that. I want to cry for you but I know long term your not worth the tears. I know you’ve had a hurtful past but I tried to help uou. We both just clashed. We’re both stubborn, we were best friends before we were together that makes it even harder. I love you but I hate you

Seeing all of you hurting makes me almost feel good knowing I’m not alone in this world! I hope you all find happiness soon... It’s been a rainy day today, like most in England but since we ended Sunday, I’ve been fine.. up until now. We broke up a few weeks ago because your controlling manipulative behaviour got the best of me and caused me to retaliate, making you end it and block me from everything just because i was busy and couldn’t come see you at work at that specific moment in time. I’ve made my fair share of mistakes, bay has massively hurt you but you’ve hurt me just as much. You decided to get back with me after what happened. You chose that life, you decided to give it another go and to forgive and forget. It was before we were even together... the pain I am feeling now isn’t pain, more like a bumbess woth a hint of sadness. I can’t explain it. I’m wondering what your doing at the moment in time. You’ve blocked me on every aspect of social media that there is, and the last thing that you tried to do was to ruin my friendship with my best friend. How selfish and cowardly off you. Grow the up. We weren’t meant to be, get in with it and learn to deal with it. Yes I’m hurting, I don’t know how you’re feeling. Where you’re living what your doing. Maybe you’ve moved back home into your abusive mums house? You do remember she tried punching me that time right? That horrible women who brings you down. And you would persistently tell me I need to prove to you I care when I was going to let you ducking move in with me and my family to take care of you. HOW can you say I don’t care. I haven’t cried over you yet and I know soon I will. I just want to know that your hurting too. I have no intentions of contacting you but I have a lot going on in my head and your all I can think about.