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Batya33

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Batya33 last won the day on March 17

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  1. Kim - are there common areas in your apartment building or complex where people hang out - is there an outdoor space like a backyard sort of? Any places where you could run into him? Are there stores right nearby where your neighbors go? Obviously you'd never stalk just wondering if there are additional opportunities to run into him.
  2. I think it's harder to ask someone out who you then have to see constantly.
  3. Yes including people who settle for "situationships" to be cool and not admit to themselves they want a proper date. It's self honesty that is needed -I'm sure situationships and spending time crafting euphemisms about "benefits" works for some 😉
  4. But she said she had a great time with the LD guy in person at their lunches, etc.
  5. Yes and in particular women who regret having casual sex painting all men as "players" or having used them.
  6. When I interacted with someone who wasn't ready to meet I was no longer ready to invest my time in typing and talking. I suggest you do the same.
  7. I think financial factors were extremely significant when my friends started getting married in the late 80s/early 90s. My wedding was very inexpensive. The wedding reception is the party not the ceremony. Also Ellis Island in my family. My parents were married for 62 years and my grandparents for over 50 - until death. I know of many divorces in all generations. My sister is divorced and she married in her early 20s. My niece is in her late 20s, mom of 3 boys, married almost 10 years. Happy! Marriage and divorce are complex. So is dating and not just now. I love being married and I think the institution of marriage is wonderful and other than in green card marriages not just a piece of paper. I don't think marriage is for everyone -it's complex!
  8. I'd be interested to know if the study included the ages of the people marrying. If it did and I missed it, sorry! My parents had zero $ when they married - mom a recent college grad and dad a recent med school grad. They made it work.
  9. People who use the pull out method are called "Parents"
  10. LOL some is personal. It depended -usually I don't know 5 or 6 -really depended on the individual person. We did not have intercourse for a number of reasons -sometimes it was everything but especially when I was still a virgin - I waited till age 24- what is "sexual " varies among people. I got serious with men who had similar values to me including that sex is part of being in love and committed only. And separately when I was around 20 the AIDS epidemic started spreading past the gay community so many were far more careful because of that. Plus I knew early on abortion likely wouldn't be for me so abstaining was a good way to avoid that potentially horrible choice. My personal values. When I was 42 and got married I'd had very few partners relatively speaking and for sure I made out with/hooked up with -many more than that -I started dating in 1979 or so. I don't judge when single consenting adults have intercourse as strangers, first date, 10th date, committed, not committed -whatever! For the OP it sounds like she's a healthy sexual person who prefers to wait. You sound fine with that. She sounds like a good and thoughtful and fun person!!
  11. I loved doing sleepovers and being romantic and sexual and passionate after we'd gone out a number of times. And we waited to have intercourse often for months. No teasing or leading on either -it was great and worth the wait so that it was once we were in love, committed and with strong potential for marriage. The one time I made an exception I regretted it and still do.
  12. Could not agree more. Very well put. I was positive the sex of my baby was male - when I was about 8 weeks pregnant -and I was right -that was the last time I was sex positive. Separately, I've always had a healthy sex drive and I've never been comfortable, personally, with casual sex.
  13. LOL yes and no -part of it is like PLEASE STOP TOO FAST! I tell him if his legs keep getting longer he'll owe us rent for taking up so much room. But I love the growing independence and kind of enjoy the push pull of the teenage "mom!!! you're embarrassing me!!" vs. "I loved being in my man cave" (his description of when he was in the womb LOL). Also -you may see this too - you see yourself -flaws and all -reflected in the temperament/likes/dislikes - if you're close then yes she might emulate the awesome parts of you and you know maybe some other stuff LOL.
  14. Are you meeting up for sex? What do you do when you "hang out?" -maybe he doesn't like texting or he's with another date and/or busy when you randomly text and why are you texting? I'd limit texts to making or confirming one of your hangout plans. Are you sure he is single? I think maybe you're leading yourself on/lying -settling for "hang outs" when you want more.
  15. My friend and I were tourists in Rome -female friend - in 2003 and we were walking near a tourist attraction and heard a local call out "It's Thelma...... and Louise!!!" (we never figured out which of us was which character - we kind of look alike!!) I agree with this. How about -ok maybe silly - here we have BOGO deals- buy one get one free - could you drop off the second item -like maybe good coffee or some overpriced gourmet cookies with a note saying -I don't need both -enjoy! And -sign with your name and contact info).
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