Here’s the thing.. when she’s in crisis mode (I don’t know how else to say that - having a dilemma, an episode, NOT doing well), it’s usually because she’s upset with someone else. Someone in her life (a friend, boyfriend, etc). And she’s always in full blown “defense” mode, every time. Anytime she’s going through this - aka a time where I should be honest with her and tell her I think she needs better therapy and coping skills - if I were to do that she would think I’m taking the side of these other people she’s upset with. I’ve seen her do this to other people countless times.
Don’t get me wrong I do always try to reason with her and tell her “I don’t think this person meant it the way you’re taking it” or something like that for example. But if I were to tell her anything more than that, anything that alludes to her needing to make a change, it won’t be pretty. She is very firm on her emotions and she often is in victim mentality. If someone tells her otherwise she cuts them off.
i don’t know, it’s really hard to explain all of this without typing too much but I hope it makes sense.