Lubber

Shes just playing hard to get by saying she doesnt do this or that on the first date. Hook, line, and sinker.

I went on a date with this girl a week ago and it went well. We had soo much in common and decided to get together some time soon. Same religion, same hobbies, same major, and we're even going to go to the same college. So I call her throughout the week and she invited me to this party on Friday, and I go and we're having a good time, and sometime in the middle of it I notice my wallets missed. We cant find it anywhere, and in the morning it still didnt show up. We were sure someone stole it. It had about a $150 dollar value including cash and giftcards. My license and debit card were in there too. So we decide to go to the beach together later that day, and I was going to teach her how to skimboard (which is basically a mix of surfing and skateboarding). So we get to the beach and things are going great, but we're both exhausted from the night before and lay down on a towl together and start playing tic tac toe in the sand. After awhile it evoles into hangman, and after a couple of games of that I decide to ask her to be my girlfriend through it. We get about half way through the question in the game and this lady comes up to me and asks if I had a skimboard. So I say yes and she says a group of kids just ran off with it. So I book it to the parking lot and look around but they were nowhere in sight, and some lady at the parking lot said they were long gone. So I amble back to the beach really pissed off because it was a $300 dollar skimboard, and my date tries to cheer me up. I mean, if it was just the board I would have been pissed, but at this point with my wallet too I was just upset and disapointed in the world and in myself. But I eventually pull it together and apologize that she had to go through all that and we continue the game until she gets all the letters. (Her answer was in hangman too). So I leave the beach $450 dollars poorer with no license and with a girlfriend, and am feeling pretty good, despite all the thievery. I think im going to tell her today that probably would have been the worst day of my life but because of her it turned out to be pretty great.

I met a girl about two weeks ago and I got her number. She lives about 30 minutes away. Since then Ive called her once a day and we would talk about 15-30 minutes until she said she had to go. We've been out on one date already and we talked sooo much about everything and enjoyed eachother's company. We have another date on Friday (arranged over the phone today Thing is, its a little different over the phone. On the she usually ends the conversation and even though were both chatterboxes sometimes I feel that she just gets tired of talking to me. I know to you older lovers out there this may seem childish but I get really nervous and generally over-analyze things regarding girls. Being hurt in the past probably hasnt help remedy that problem, but I try to look at things the way the are regardless of my initial fears. Im getting better. Thing is, I really like this girl. A lot. We have an incredible amount of things in common. Were both Jewish, were both in Marching band, were both from divorced homes, were both majoring in Engineering, Were both going to the same college... and the more I get to know her the better it gets. Im just afraid Ill scare her away. Questions are... How often should I call her? When should I tell her my feelings? (This Fri perhaps?) Some motivation wouldnt hurt either

Romantic I think. I want that special person to care for, to prove my love for. Im a hopeless romantic and need a plausable outlet. I have to admit, when I had that false relationship awhile back I was happy. I could do all these things to make her happy, all these things that make her blush and smile and go "Aww!". Things like taking her out to fly a kite and enjoying eachothers company, or just going to a playground and goofing around (Im fairly playful and you could call me immature and get away with it too Stuff that just shows I care. Ionno, I just love doing that kind of stuff. I want that special someone to prove my love for. Problem is wheres the love?

Try being his friend. A person who youre this close to is a bad person to lose. If the feelings stay for a long long time and even hurt, then you need to distance yourself from him for awhile. Once your feelings have subsided, you should be alright being his friend.

I know but its so hard for me to find people who i like. (read my thread want to want for some more background) Getting married would be a long time away anyways, and isnt that the point of dating? To see if two people can put up with eachother for a period of time? Personally I would never want to go into a relationship thinking I can marry someone. I think thats something that needs to be built upon in the relationship. As for the smile thing, I tried humoring her. She broke up with her boyfriend awhile before we started hanging out and she was talking about him during this whole confusion thing. He was 15. I was all like "Hey at least I have a car! Think of all the cool places I could drive you." and stuff like that to get a smile out of her, but she would just smile and then get upset that I wouldnt give up on her... -- hahaha Dali. Its so true with the mom thing. Ionno I kinda get the whole Cultral Jew thing though. My mom isnt very religious, but she recently started dating this Jewish guy and says she has never felt a connection like this before. Maybe its the same for this other girl? But for God's sake (hah... hah... pun.), its highschool.

Confront her about it. Dont mention the myspace thing, just ask if shes cheating on you, and if she lies, tell her you know she is. I wouldnt recomend sticking with her though. If shes cheating on you, then shes cheating on this other guy at the same time, and nobody likes a cheater. She isnt ment for you. Its a hard blow for anyone to take dude, and im sorry you have to deal with it. Just hang through it and remember all those corny things people say. Life gives you lemons, better to have loved and lost, blah blah blah.

Dont let it become a crutch for every time you become upset though. Your mind could build an addiction to it. Everything in moderation.

Im reviving this dead post because I decided to wait it out a bit and pretty much have a similar situation. I decided to jump the gun and asked out this girl that I "liked", and well, it went alright for a bit but in the long run she really wasnt the kind of person I wanted. Honeymoon phase is something isnt it? I guess it was just infatuation. I still feel so unguided. I finally started liking someone after I broke up with the other girl and she liked me too, but because of religion differences she couldnt pursue it, which really pisses me off... Im getting worried and impatient. I want to just ask people I know out on dates and see how it goes, but the ones who I want to ask are too young and the ones who are old enough Im friends with or I dont want to ask. Just wondering if theres any more consolation / advice out there? I keep hearing "just wait and it will come!" But its been even longer now and it feels like im still just floating in still air...

Good to hear from a fellow Jew Uggh It just pisses me off you know? Feels like you finally find someone and the barrier between you and them is intangible...

Shes Christain. Methodist I think.

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About a month ago I started liking this girl. She was beautiful- brown hair, green eyes, freckles, all the things i find attractive in a girl. We could also talk for hours about anything. basically, I felt like we just clicked. Anyways, we're in calculus together and every day before a test I would go over and we'd study for a bit and then goof off and talk/listen to music/play hardcore tetris, and I found myself even more attracted to her. Well one day when I was helping my friend out with a project, she calls me up and asks me to go to Mosi with her and a friend (this huge science thing that had a display of the human body), and I reluctantly told her I couldnt. She was sad and tried to get me to change my mind but i promised i'd help my friend. So anyways once that was over with, we were cleaning up and she calls again and convinces me to meet her up at this mall inbetween Mosi and where I was, about an hour and a half drive. So I say yes and drive all the hell the way up there and we hang out and have a good time. Then a friend of hers calls and asks to go to the movies with her, and she asked if I would like to tag along, and so I do. We get to the movies and close to the end I put my arm around her and she puts her head into my shoulder, and after the movie she says "Hey... I like you, but, we cant date" And im all like huh whaaa? So I convince her to talk about it and we go to her house and have this long and confusing conversation. She said that she really likes me and that I'm one of the only guys that will actually listen to her when she talks and stuff like that, but says she cant see a future with us. When I ask her why not she says "she doesnt know how to explain it without seeming like an a**hole". So I hug her goodbye and leave with eyes full of tears and a head full of confusion. It wasnt the rejection that got to me. It was the leading on. You know? I felt like it was going to work, and for the first time someone i really liked liked me back. Then when she DOES like me, she cant go out with me for some reason. I just didnt make any sense to me. So anyways, a week or so later I was talking to a friend and I found out that she didnt date a friend of mine several years ago because he was Jewish, and that a similar situation to mine happened. Well, I just so happen to be Jewish too. I was hurt. I felt that if two people like eachother that they should pursue it regardless of religion. Im pretty liberal and im totally for different religions in the girls I date. Im not super religious, im very open minded and even interested. I was just wondering: Any solution or consolation to this mess? I find myself starting to have feelings for her again...

Good point. Ionno, we had a fun conversation on the way to her car though with me mispronouncing like 4 words, which we turned into things just for fun (like feminemone instead of femininity), so i drew her an underwater scene with the 4 things we made up plus a bunch of other funny things, and she really liked it and has it hanging in her locker now. Plus she wanted to go to the homecoming dance with me and made me promise to dance with her before hand (which i did once we had it), so i think theres interest. If I ask her to sit next next to me though maybe she'll catch the hint??

Hey. I asked this girl who I'm friendly with to the movies a couple of days ago, and she was enthusiastic about the idea, but then after talking about it for a minute or two, some of our friends came out and she was like "hey why dont we invite them too!" so i invite them and now like 7 other people are going. Question is: Good or bad? I know its not good, but is it a negative sign? Also, is making a move during the movie in this situation bad? Thanks! (Movie starts in 2 hrs!)