Q10

Hi all! I'm having bad days these days mainly because of university.. I'm in a university which teaches in another language then my mother tongue and I'm in engineering. I didnt have much clue on what to take at the university The main reason I choose engineering was because my parents thought I was good at physics and math and I was a quick thinker and was in to electronics/computers. But since I got in, my grades were low, I was excluded from my program. But I talked to the university and I got in probation the first year, and corrected that problem by taking easier optional courses the second semestre. But now I have the same problem again, and this time I failed two courses that I failed last year, again, which are physics and chemistry. Now the university rules are: You can't fail the same course twice or you'll be excluded & your average can't be lower than a certain degree. Well I did both.. I knew I had failed those courses and I knew my parents were going to call me today for the test results & I couldn't sleep yesterday.. I actually had a panic attack in the middle of my sleep, and then I was so tired I don't remember the rest.. I'm scared that the stress is effecting my health negatively because I never had panic attacks like these a couple years ago.. I don't know what to do anymore, all my family knows I'm in engineering and there's a lot of peer pressure, but I don't think I can possibly continue like this.. Right now I'm excluded from my program and my family doesn't know that.. I don't know how I'm going to tell them I need to switch to another program, and I'm thinking of administration.. I'm just really scared on their reaction when they hear I'll be switching programs Which is ok for me, since I never thought I'd be working as an engineer, my dad wanted me to finish engineering and get an mba and work somewhere not necessarily as an engineer.. but that's pretty much impossible. Should I tell my parents that I'll be switching programs or should I switch and then tell them.. I'm really scared they'd be mad at me for not being able to do it I don't know what I'm asking here, I think I just want to hear your opinions/advice..

I have to agree with you guys, Blender has really helped me a lot also. His/her posts are REALLY awesome..

Go to sleep, sleep over it for a night, and then think about it again. don't do it.

yup sounds like he might be with someone but looking for someone else.. like a monkey who won't let go of one branch before grabbing another one. Happy birthday btw.

Two different view points.. Thanks for your replies. mystic*dreamer, yes you have a point I never realised but I can't change the feelings I have about him, can I.. And I wanted to be 100% happy on my birthday with my friends. Not 99%, 100%. That's why I didn't want him to come, so I wouldn't have to worry about someone ruining my party.. Now his saying "If you have good times with a friend, and after he disrespect you, is he still a friend? and is it still good times?" on his nickname, but I don't see where I disrespected him. I just am pissed and wanted some time off to cool off my anger.

...lol can I join you guys? same here.. I have an exam today and tomorrow, I "studied", or tried to, yesterday night and yeah..

Saturday I invited my close female friend to my invite only party, she said they might be having a girls night with two of her friends, so I invited her friends also, told them I could go pick them up if they didn't have a drive and she said she'd talk with them and call me back. She did and her friends wanted to come to my house. So I went to pick them up, went shopping and then we went to my place. Before other people came, she took my computer to chat. Later on that night we had lots of fun and yesterday I was checking my chat logs, I see this email adress I don't know, I click on the file it turns out to be her chat log, and in it she's saying how she doesn't want to be at my party and rather be there with that person and that she'd have more fun there than at my place?!?!?!!!! I don't have the rest of the log since I told her to change computers. What the hell?! I invite her friends just so she can come, I go pick them up, have an awesome party (her friend said they really enjoyed it) but the girl I invited in first place, the one I thought was the closest does this?! I messaged her about it yesterday, I told her she should've used the other computer from the beginning, she asked me why and I told her because the other computer does not log and that I saw some things I'd rather have not seen!!! She asked me why, was it bad, and I told her that I'm not pleased. She asked me what she said and I said that it's not important but to make sure she uses the other computer if she ever does again. She told me ok and told me she's sorry if she offended me but that she didn't write anything bad about us guys.. I tried to cut it short, just make my point to her but was that successfull? I told my friend about this and he said that I'm really calm compared to her(sorry, him) and he'd freak out and tell her to go ... herself.. I'd have really liked to tell her that she should've told me that and I'd have gladly paid for her taxi so she could leave.. But I didn't because I didn't want to prolongue the argument.. Am I over reacting? Thinking too much in to this? A friend of mine says I am but I think I am really offended because of her saying that after I invite her friends so she can be at my party and picking them up personally.. I'm really mad!!! I don't know how to react WHAT AM I DOING WRONG HERE?!

Hey everyone! I wrote about my friend who was making stupid verbal & physical jokes the last time and warned him about it. And then things got better, but I'm still angry at him so I tried to stay away from him to cool down for the last 2 months. And today I'm throwing a party, it's invitation only and yesterday the guy messaged me asking what I'm doing today..I told him I'm not sure and he asked if there's a party at my place. I said maybe and he asked who was going, so I told him people who I invited were going and he asked me if I have something against him and asked why everyone else is invited and not him, told me that he thought we were buddies. I told him he's not because he's been making some jokes I don't appreciate so I just want to keep it cool for a little bit. And asked him if he noticed that I'm not hanging out with him often in the last month and that it's not because I don't see him as a friend but to make sure we stay as friends. He told me he cant believe I'm actually saying this and that the people invited are his friends and he's not even invited and told me that he thought we were friends.. I repeated that we still are friends, I just need time to cool off and then he said hes pissed and this is not the way to play it cool at all and told me its the fact that it's all his friends going and hes just there like if nobody even cares. I told him again I wanted some time off and told him I don't feel like talking about this anymore and quit. Later on that night, he comes to my house. He asks to talk and I told him I didn't want to right now (mainly because he was going to insist on getting himself invited) and then he stayed at my place for some time just watched tv(? what the) and then when he was leaving, he told me "so are we cool" I told him that we'll talk about it later. (He likes to invite himself, like we were planning a roadtrip with some other friends and one day he just calls me and asks me if me and my friends are going on a road trip I say yes and he tells me he won't be able to come..we didn't even tell him about a roadtrip../ another day another party, I invite people, and while talking with a friend she says that guy's gonna pick her up and bring her here, so I was like huh? I basically do NOT like people inviting themselves. And want him to understand that) Now, something I noticed is that, I'm afraid he just wants to come to my party and not really care about our friendship, that's why I don't want him here today, if he cares about the friendship, that won't bother him, but if all he cares is the party, then he'll get pissed and not talk to me (or maybe suck it up for the hopes of future parties..) What do you guys think? I clearly don't want him here for my party, but I'm afraid he might show up if I don't show him clearly that I do not want him here today. What are your opinions on the whole situation? & What can I do to make sure he understands, he is NOT invited???? ..I never said he was, but he's trying everything to make himself believe that he is. ps. I NEVER TOLD about the parties to him!!! HE HEARS them from others! I turned off my cellphone yesterday so if he called he wouldnt be able to reach me AND HE SHOWED UP AT MY DOOR to talk & convince me to get himself invited?!

Yes Grokker, I thought about that too, actually that's what I was thinking at first. She told me she meant it by heart but I still thought "she's just not interested to be with *me*". It's just these last days that messed with my head a little because maybe I can't figure out if she's being friendly (by coming to the night club with me on my birthday) or just trying to know me. I was expecting her to be with someone else, I was thinking the same as you, that I'll see her going out with someone else, in fact, she's going to the movies with other guys right now and she has been like that for a while, which means if she wanted a relationship, she'd be in one right now. It's been like a month I asked her out on a date and didn't ask her again, just played it cool. "Why would a girl tell you she is not ready for a relationship" - My answer to that is in my first thread, she told me her last relationship ended by getting her heart broken and she told me she's just not ready to take another chance just yet..

lol congrats quietgrl!!!!!! awesome and it IS a big step

Hey everyone, for the people who read my threads, I asked a girl on a date whom I thought (with everyone else) was interested in me. (Thread here: ) She said she doesn't want a relationship with anyone and assured me that she means it with anyone. Then again I told her it wouldn't be a problem and it wouldn't effect our relationship as friends. But then, these days, we started hanging out more and more. Last week I was going to a night club for my birthday and she messaged me saying happy birthday, I told her thanks and told her she should join me. So she told me she was planning on going somewhere with her friends and that they'd join me. So they did and we went to a friends house and then the night club. During the night, her friends got bored and left but she stayed with me and we danced together till the club closed. ((Question #1) I didn't try to kiss her when I walked her to the taxi, was that a mistake?) And then this weekend, she came to my house for my birthday party, we took really nice pictures together, just the two of us and they slept over with a couple of friends. I gave her my bed and I slept at my parents bedroom. I talked with a friend about this and he told me girls sometimes don't say yes in the first try and that I'd have to try and try again? I didn't do this because I don't want to make her feel pressured and scare her away. He was telling me girls like men who know what they want and go after it.. What are your opinions on this one? So my questions would be 1) What do you think about me not trying to kiss her that night? I thought I was being a gentleman.. 2) What are your opinions on this? 3) What should I do?

from past experiences I learned that it doesn't hurt to ask/talk and make sure. Because I was in a "relationship" where I thought we were something, actually, my friends thought the same thing just to learn we weren't anything afterwards, which make me look/feel like an idiot..

Sorry babypink if I miswrote that, my communication skills really do suck. I got funds and paying my university fees with those funds. Normally my dad was paying for my university but I told him I could get funds and pay my own univ. and he could use his money for his business. He's not taking away that money. I just missed the deadline for application because I thought I applied for it and the secretary told me that was all I needed. And then I checked a week after and they told me sometimes it does take a while for the funds to get in, so I waited. It's just the fact that, normally he'd be paying if I had kept my mouth shut about the student loans and I wouldn't have to go through this. I tried to help him with his business but missed an application so now he's all pissed at me and told me he'll take away from my savings (I had been saving money, for no reason, to use in the future)

I hate everything right now I'm all alone, my family has just left for vacation for a month today and thing've started going wrong ALREADY it's my bday in 2 days, I'll be all alone away from my family on my bday for the first time and then today things started going wrong.. My dad was paying for my university and I told him I can get student loans so that he can use the university money for his business. So thats what we did, and this semestre, I thought I applied for it, but it turns out I applied for something else! (There was 2 documents, I just applied for one instead of both..) and now it's too late! I thought it was just the government who was being slow.. Because I went to ask to make sure everything was ok before and they just told me the government's slow sometimes I never suspected they never received my application.. and now I called my dad to get his credit card number so I could pay it online, I'm already late!!! (geez, 1st semestre is almost done! ) So he told me it was my responsability to make sure etc. But I didn't KNOW! It was my first time doing this myself.. He was pissed and told me to do whatever I want to do. My credit card has a limit and my account has around 3k but I need like 3.3k so I got his credit card and tried to pay it online but the system gave an error saying the card might've been charged telling me to go to the register at my school.. He told me he'll take half of the university money from my account as a punishment!! I HATE EVERYTHING, it's been years I've been saving my money and he's talking about taking half of it.. I hate my life right now, alone in this place, this is the first day and I already feel like ending my life Only if I had kept my mouth shut and not told him I can take money from the government so he could use the money for his business..

Very well said fatfaso. And you are right.. Actually, we all know inside what the right thing to do is. But we never do it. We still want to try and see it fail to feel better in the long run. When you're older and you look back, you think "At least I tried till there was no other option". So even if everyone knows what the right thing to do is, that doesn't mean you will do it.