missing003

Saw a photo of you today, one of our mutual friends had posted it. First one I had seen in 5 months since I initiated no contact. It made me miss you. I looked at it for a good 15 min, just looking at you and remembering the good times we shared. It was almost like seeing your ghost, it was strange. I feel different about you now though. I can’t really describe it, but I know I am and have been healing. If this was 2 months ago I would have started crying just seeing you. I know what we had was in the past and you have moved on with your life. I am trying my hardest to do the same. I will never forget you, but I hope one day soon I will be completely out of love with you.

6 months and I am still thinking of you everyday G. I still dream about you. I still have my low days where I cry over the thought of you. I ing miss you. I just miss you.

5 months ago today you left me. Still think about you G. I miss you tons. I hope one day you think about me.

I wonder everyday if you think about me. I hate that I have no choice but to let you go. I would give anything to be with you again. its been 5 months and I still miss you so much. I hope one day our paths will cross again.

I got a new job today. I am so excited to start this new chapter in my life. I wish I could tell you about it.

Went to the movies and ran into your dad and little brother. He gave me a hug and we talked for a bit. He seemed happy to see me and gave me a hug good bye. First time I had ran into your family since you left me. It was so hard no to cry in the movie. I miss you so so much it rips me apart. Seeing them just made me remember all the good times we had together with them. I miss being part of that and the connection. Why is this happening to me! I just want you in my life! I know everything happens for a reason but this is so hard for me. I don't know how to not be sad and not miss you. It's been 4 months yesterday and I am still having such a hard time without you. All my wishes are for you. I wonder if you miss me. I wonder if you have forgotten about me. This all seems so easy for you. The love I have is not given lightly. I gave you my whole heart and its so hard to put it back together when I feel like I am missing a piece of myself. Life has been a real struggle for me recently. I don't know what to do anymore.

July 4th would have been our 4th year together. So many good memories together. This year is going to be so hard without you. I miss you.

I miss your smile, your laugh. I wish we could be a part of each other's lives but it's just to hard right now. I still think about you everyday. My healing is making progress but I still miss the good times. One day I will see you again and we can just be friends. You're a good person and I wish you the best.

Laying in bed missing the feeling of your head resting on my chest as you sleep. I hope you miss me. I don't want you to hurt like I do. But I hope I hold a special place in your heart. Love you G, I will never forget what we had.

Miss you today. It feels different though. I miss you as my best friend, the good times we had together. It's hard not to look back on the fun days and seeing you smile. I know you're gone, but you will always have a special place in my heart. I will never forget you and I hope you never forget me because we shared some amazing moments together. I look forward to the day I can look back on these memories and smile instead of feeling sad. We both deserve happiness. As we go our separate ways in life I hope you find what you're looking for. Maybe one day we will meet again.

Tonight I went out with for a friends birthday but in the back of my head I reminisced on the great times we had together. It makes me sad knowing I need to put those times behind me. I miss you G. Everything happens for a reason, I hope that leads me back to you one day.

My birthday is this Saturday and you're all I can think about. First birthday in years I won't have you around. I miss you. No contact has gotten easier, everyone tells me I will heal with time. I wish time would speed up and I could just get over this feeling of you haunting me through out my days. I forgive you for breaking my heart, I really do. I know you didn't mean to crush me like this. I just want the pain to stop already.

I had a dream you met someone new last night. It felt so real and I woke up so sad knowing that one day it will be my reality. I miss you so much it hurts. I have already changed so much about myself in the 3 months you have been gone. Working out, eating healthy, making never friends, going out and being more social than ever. I wish you could see me now. I am trying my hardest to let go. I pray that you're happy. You know I loved you more than anything in this world and would do whatever it took to make you smile. Maybe one day we will see each other again and we can just be friends just like the years before we dated. But for now I must say good bye. It hurts to much to hold on to someone who doesn't love me anymore.