Lisa Love

Thank you. You helped me put it into words I couldn’t find. That’s exactly what’s happening. I know what needs to happen I just feel so alone and I don’t believe I can actually make it on my own. So this cycle keeps repeating itself. You’re right Ill start with a counselor.

They’ve never been there for me and never will be. It’s a pretty lonely and scary road. That’s why I keep coming to these forum. I’m not sure what answer I’m looking for.

I’ve complained about my spouse and family many times. But I can’t seem to break out of this toxic cycle. I got in an argument with my husband in the car today and he decided to drive up to my elderly parents home and let them know we’re fighting. My dad is 70 and when he received the phone call his blood pressure went up high. He was startled and didn’t know what was happening. I left my husband in front of my parents home and he wouldn’t go inside and was standing in front of the car not letting me drive away. He has threatened me many times with calling my parents when we argue but today he decided to drive up to their home in the middle of an argument. I lost it and started hitting him. I drove off and when I came back my dad was furious and blaming me for everything that happened. My psychotic brother decided to get involved and also started blaming me without even hearing me out on what is actually happening. On one hand I was heartbroken for my dad and his health and on the other hand I realized they want me to submit to my husband no matter what in fear that I will get divorced. I’m trying to recover after what happened but I’m at a lose of words. My husband couldn’t care less about almost giving my dad a heart attack and told me I hope I learned my lesson today.

Thank you 🙏 this makes a lot of sense. I am well aware of their behavior. One sister is a spiritual teacher and she said oh you know that word gaslighting I recently learned it. You know how I used to deny everything that’s true. Used to as in something in the past. They are so delusional it’s unreal.

Where do I start. The last years I have come to reolize my older adult sister are highly deceptive, disrespectful and even narcissistic. We’re all adults and when I bring it up to my mother how unfair, selfish and vindictive they have been towards me my mother Denys any wrong doing. If I’m at her home she will even ask me to leave if I don’t drop the topic and if she’s at my home shell threaten to leave herself. An example is after lockdown my sisters went on vacation with their kids and didn’t invite me and my one child. They sent me a last minute invite to save face. My other sister is getting married and they’re having a pre-party and I was told to only come on the day of the wedding. When I bring this up to my mom she says “they have their own lives to worry about” and then threatens to leave if I challenge her statement. I just want an explanation as to why I’m ostracized from family events. I’ve never felt this alone in my entire life. It’s very hard when you’re own family invalidates you. I’ve come to deeply hate all of them.