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Boughtandpaidfor

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  1. Best two films I saw in the last year were both by the same director (though I didn't realise it at the time): "Frank" and "Room".
  2. Aaaarrrggghhhhhh Would help right now "Anger issues. You have anger issues". Ok. And? Did I have anger issues before you started telling me I had anger issues? How do you get angry with someone who is trying to make you angry? Who feels pleasure when you are angry. Even when you're not in front of them. When you're angry alone. They still see you. Happy. Being calm. "You're too calm". Being angry. "You have anger issues". You need help. Get help. Then come back. You were supposed to help me. What's going on? Google. Google. Google. Google. Porn. Alcohol. Google. Google. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Google........ search results: Gaslighting. Aaaaarrrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!
  3. Be one Relax into knowing that none of this can happen without you The entire universe, as you know it, reports to you Including this body, these thoughts, this personality. And so what are you? Be one. Be one that watches pain One that watches joy. Be one with the one that experiences it all. Whatever its name. Freedom can come in a moment. Blessed and touched by a joy of seeing. Feel one. Be that which sees it all. You are freedom itself, effortlessly.
  4. You are capacity. There is a lot of things inhabiting this space Thoughts, feelings, senses, images. It's all happening right here. Remove all the things that are happening Remove the people you know Remove everything you see and hear In a vacuum, what are you? Without the things outside, out there, There is nothing to be found that can be called you Existing all of it in relationship to you You then, are space, in which it is happening What then, is the difference between all of that and you? Where does out there end and in here begin? Look at your hand- it's out there isnt it? Just like that person over there. Can you find anything that isnt just out there Watch it all, let it all pass through. This is the goal. And then you are free.
  5. Light floods in and eases my nighttime stirs But only for a brief moment am I allowed any solace It takes a few moments for the engine to kick in For the thoughts, that I left so willingly, to find me It takes courage to be alone and awake at the moment Especially now- there's never a break from it A constant humming of useless thoughts buzzing, buzzing Flying round and round demanding attention The insecurity kicks in first, asking what will you do today? Then the hatred, and the pride, invade breakfast Then futility of such navel gazing made all the worse By the knowledge that once outside I'll start pretending Life is with people, no great revelation made alone Anything you decide is you has to be tested as them You can't learn to enjoy life without a wall to bounce off Solitude can lead to all manner of trouble best avoided
  6. I posted this ages ago... I thought it was really obvious what it was about. But I now if I read it I guess its not clear at all. Bit of a messy one. It was about a girl I got totally obsessed with even though I'm in a relationship
  7. Don't do anything Don't engage in anything. Don't decide what to cook for dinner Don't think you should be going to the gym Don't plan to pick up that guitar again Don't do anything Don't do those things you don't need to do Don't turn on the tv Don't check your email Don't look at your cellphone again It doesn't matter now. Don't do anything Don't engage in anything It's wonderful. It's not empty, because the effortless filling of the vacuum is rich But not forced Don't do anything Don't engage in anything It's so great.
  8. It comes out suddenly It doesn't come out when it's forced It doesn't play when you look at it It doesn't like being named It lasts as long as you do not It runs for cover when you ask it a question It answers you when you ask "when will this end?" It is a sharp knife tip you teeter upon It likes you to breathe It feels much better about you than you think It does It forgives you always It is best when you are open It thrives when you don't defend anything It helps you keep yourself open It comes from others and you can feel it It can't be felt by those who want to be It only comes to those who do "being"
  9. The one I've got, it's fine I want want want though Want new, want exciting I'm motivated by the possibilites. Fresh feeling, thrilling endangermant Hard work about to be thrown from window In the name of lust and new distraction Nevertheless it's all looking pretty damn green. The one I've got, it's old But it's solid and full of life It's not going anywhere (good) It's not going anywhere (bad) Having both feels tantalising Thrill of having that new one We could both ignore the old And live and live and live....... our brains out. No no. This isn't going anywhere The guilt will kill us (I mean me obviously, since this is all about my throbbing, lustful, aching......ego). Damn I want to anyway.... But if I didn't feel guilty about it Or know what everyone would say I would've posted this in "relationships". Instead of "poetry".
  10. I think that is without a doubt the best poem ever put on this website. No doubt.
  11. Holding hard, feeling brittle Kind softness in the feet begins Slowly working its way up.
  12. An amazing array of thoughts Flies around buzzing in my brain What do you do with all these? Opening briefly, then feeling too stetched And a long close and loss and confusion But the memory of opening stays. Goals set out become whips that punish Judgement reigns over everything and slows And the blurred intangible mesh. Only when attempts cease and all is let go When all hope and despair is equally gone Only then do you get a moment Well earned and hard fought for Totally deserved and yours to relish Hold it tight and it is gone. Breathe and feel it deeply Or the memory once it's gone Ever it waits to be there
  13. Had a bit of a sitdown. N' lit up like a bonfire. Felt reet hot inside and all alive n' that. Woke up with nowt but worries. But never mind eh. All I need is a little sit down n ' there we go. Take a breath in. Ahhhh. N' out, and there goes all the pain Instead I've got warm soup inside me. Great. See things passing by and by. But nowt worthing hanging on to. It's all there but what's t' use o'grabbing like?
  14. The more you throw out The less there is to reflect on you The more you bind outside The less returns and keeps As you find that, inside you, Feelers and tentacles retract And become you The mirror that sees the world sees clearly Fire burns brightly and, The air of the world breathes it deeply And I am really there To see it all.
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