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boltnrun

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boltnrun last won the day on March 27

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  1. Sometimes a guy I like doesn't like me back. It doesn't mean he's a narcissist or he has bipolar or BPD. My husband didn't "court" me, I guess. But he frequently bought me flowers and he bought me a car before we even got engaged. I considered those things romantic and signs he cared. Oh, and I cooked for him and helped him get a job where I was working. Was that "courting"? IDK Oh, and is it only on men to do this "courting" thingy or can women do it too?
  2. Some people think it's weird that I say hello to the people in my neighborhood when I go on walks. I know one person in particular who posts on this forum who says they never, ever speak to their neighbors. And this is in the US. I can't speak for other cultures. But we're quite diverse in the US. Some of my childhood friends had parents who threw the doors to their homes open and let any neighbor kids who wanted to roam in and out. My parents, OTOH, weren't super comfortable with hordes of kids running in and out. My son played with a couple of little girls in our apartment building who were of different ethnicities and they had never eaten dinner at a home other than their own. The idea was completely foreign to them. But I would imagine a friendly hello is pretty universally appreciated.
  3. I find blond or sandy haired men attractive but the last three relationships I had were with dark haired men. They all had really pretty eyes though.
  4. That makes me sad. I neither fear nor hate the male gender. I think men are beautiful, just as I think women are beautiful. In some similar and some very different ways. And I love the differences. I don't want to date a man who acts like a woman. If I wanted that I would just date women. However I am fine with however someone chooses to conduct themselves as long as it's done with kindness and a genuine caring for others. I see good, kind people of all ages and all socioeconomic ranges. And I see attractive people across the board. I choose to love, celebrate and admire others, not hate them or fear they're out to get me. I have two friends who constantly state "everyone's an a-hole" and "I hate people". How sad.
  5. Maybe he's trying to get his long-suffering wife to file. News flash, he could still be ordered to pay all court costs even if she files. Especially if they're in the US and live in a "fault" state.
  6. OMG I'm in a Teams meeting and one of the attendees accidentally turned his camera on. It clearly showed him lying in bed 😆
  7. If I recall correctly you said you have a lot of debt, which is why you took this second job. I don't know if taking on even more debt is a good idea. Plus, you would have to be able to afford to not make any profit for six months to a year, which means you would need to have enough savings to make the mortgage and loan payments you currently have in addition to business and personal expenses. How about setting up as a business consultant or providing administrative services to various businesses? That would require very little startup cash. You could have multiple clients. I did some bookwork on the side years ago (billing and accounts receivable). It was nice to have extra money coming in and I didn't have to get a business license or get a loan. And you could choose your clients instead of being stuck with just one you don't like or respect.
  8. This might be a "woman" thing but I wouldn't want my neighbor admitting he's listening in to what I'm doing in my apartment. That would feel forward and intrusive.
  9. BTW, do you know what they call men who use the pull out method? "Dad".
  10. A "mistake"? So his clothes accidentally fell off and so did theirs and he tripped and fell and his penis accidentally landed inside all these women's vaginas? No, he did it on purpose. The pregnancies may have been unintentional but surely he knows how babies are made. Has he been fully STI tested since he got back from this wild "break"? Have you had sex with him? If so, have you been tested? Since this relationship began as an extramarital one, it's not surprising he thinks he's free to bang whoever he wants. The real question is, are YOU feeling good about this? I presume you aren't. There are so many millions of men out there. Why shackle yourself to this one?
  11. Oh, I get it. He was there for five minutes and wasn't treating you with the respect you feel you deserve as a longer term employee. Was the business owner being nicer to him than to you?
  12. @catfeeder, I can't find the post! It was an older thread from last summer, where the man had been in a toxic relationship and the woman had a threesome with two very young men while they were supposed to be on a break. His daughter posted that he had committed suicide and she found his posts on this forum on his laptop. Apparently he kept going back to the toxic relationship. It's extremely sad. And thanks for the support. Yes, I am trying to help. I liken it to knowing fire is hot from past experience but wanting to warn someone rather than just standing by while they put their hand in it to find out for themselves. Have you seen that Anthony Anderson commercial about Type II diabetes, where he shows a photo of a coffin and says "Too much? That's the point!" So yeah, I am trying to help but that doesn't mean everyone will like my approach.
  13. Not judgment, it's concern. There was a recent post update here in this forum where the daughter of a previous poster told us he'd committed suicide. That's extremely distressing and upsetting. (No, I do not think you're even close to that point. Just an example of how things can be upsetting and even frightening). You're a young woman with the world at your feet. I feel that man is no good for you. I'm sorry that my tone was excessively harsh. Not my intent.
  14. Exactly, which is why I recognize the signs of minimizing, justifying, etc. It's hard for me to see someone else struggling with the same situation. If I can possibly help them I will try. I am not attracted to my toxic ex anymore, not even physically. When I think of him I feel revulsion and repulsed, not attracted. But I have the benefit of a LOT of time having passed. Right after it ended? Yeah, I even told a friend I would happily be the one he turned to when his relationship with the much younger woman he'd dumped me for turned bad. Jeez. Big time cringe.
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