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lark265

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  1. good job....you did the breakup. I suppose it's best. But it's sure not what we signed up for. That day in the church. but we never communicated. I wish I didn't have the "selective memory" I have - thinking it was a good relationship most of the time. But I am also crying over spilled milk. In the past. My point is that whether or not it was a good thing, it's done. I remember with my high school girlfriend - the pain of that breakup is just like this. The sense of life force being ripped out of me. Because I gave so much into the relationship. I don't mean to pat myself on the back, I am saying I transfer TOO MUCH into the relationship. Not really your fault. The stuff that is fighting hard against dying is the dreams. The concept. That is, the dreams I had in my heart about us. Then, insisting to myself that I find out how I ed up. Because if it's over, and I don't want it to be, then it must be MY fault. The children. You are a good Mom. And I AM SO HARD ON MYSELF. It's like I was doing brain surgery or something and I cut the wrong thing. Which WOULD be my fault since the surgeon was me. But a relationship involves two.....................more later
  2. good thread.....way down deep I know this breakup is for the best.....it's the little baby inside me that "wants her back"!! And then, of course, if that happened I would feel good for a while, but reality would creep in.........
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