Who knows... But anyway relations should make one be happy! Even happier than he(she) is. And in your case, you are not happy, neither in relations, nor in life. So, you can't think clearly, understand what you need. He showed himself enough... Why are you always looking back, not forward??? May be there is the right man for you and you are up to your ears in relations that finished (to tell you the truth) long ago.
Try to make yourself happy, first of all. It's your life! Love yourself! Life is short, what will you have to remember in the end? Partings, tears, pain??? For what??? Change your attitude to life. Sorry, if i sounded a little coarse