maccerz

It's been exactly 2 weeks since we last spoke. I'm feeling pretty good! I'm definitely a happier person when we're not in contact. I keep having dreams about him though, really upsetting dreams! They always consist of me walking into his bedroom to find him naked in bed with another girl and him not giving a s*** that iv seen and showing absolutely no emotion towards me. Very irritating

It's creeping up on the longest amount of time that we haven't spoken for! Him and his friends went away to Amsterdam for the weekend today, so I have those pictures to look forward to seeing on Facebook... I have him and all his friends hidden on fb but a really good friend of mine is going out with one of his friends so she's over there with them and will no doubt take millions of pictures... I just need to find the willpower NOT to look!!! Apart from that I'm doing pretty good I think..

I find myself waking up every morning wondering if i'll have a text from you on my phone, and always being slightly heart broken when I dont. Even though on the rare occasions that I have, your texts have been very blunt and unfriendly, and always made me more upset. I think I just wanna know that you still think about me from time to time, that our 3 year relationship meant enough to you that you haven't forgotten about me yet. When I'm busy I'm happy, but it's on these mornings when I have a day off work and just wanna relax that I find myself getting lost in thoughts of you. I wonder if you're seeing someone new.. I sense that you're not lonely because I think if you were you'd have gotten in contact with me, and so I wonder is there someone new in your life already. This is what happens when I'm alone and have nothing to do - I over think everything. It's such a shame because I used to really enjoy the time I got to spend by myself, now it seems like a prison of unwanted thoughts and feelings.

I can't believe it's been 50 days... in some ways it's seems so much more recent and in others so much longer ago. It's been exactly a week since I've spoken to him. not that our conversation this day last week could even really be counted as one but still it was contact.. I'm feeling quite good but definitely feeling a bit lonely, it's been such a long time since iv been on my own and although it's very liberating, it takes a lot of getting used to. I have my moments where I find it pretty hard but overall I think I'm doing pretty well and probably happier now than I've been in quite some time

Aw god you poor thing! Panic attacks are absolutely horrible, but well done u got through it and you're seeing the light (even if it's only the tiniest ray right now) You WILL be happy again, and you're definitely going the right way about it. All these obstacles you are facing at the moment sound very difficult but they'll only make u feel even more successful and wonderful when u do eventually get your life back on track! Just remember you can't appreciate the wonderful things in your life without experiencing some bad stuff along the way, sounds to me like you're due a lot of good stuff so just hang on, keep going with the NC and keep being positive! The very best of luck to you xx

So we broke up in the middle of Decemeber and there's been a few occasions where we've gone a week or 2 with no contact but he always ends up texting me and I usually end up caving and replying! But not this time, it's been 4 days and I plan on making absolutely zero contact with him for the next month!! I think valentines day will be hard but im determined not to speak to him! I'm actually very happy on my own, but I think I have a bit of an addiction to having him there knowing I can just contact him whenever I feel like it and knowing he will always make me feel better when I'm feeling bad! I need to learn that I don't NEED this in my life, I need to learn how to make myself happy!! I definitely think I'm getting there but NC makes it A LOT easier!

I genuinely have no idea how I'm feeling right now, I know time will help but what if I never meet anyone I care about as much as I cared about you? Why don't you seem to care very much that we're no longer together? I dont know how to not care, I wish I did. It was a mutual break up and I know towards the end we were more like best friends than boyfriend and girlfriend but I don't know how to do this.. how to not be with you, it hurts more than I ever thought it would. I just want you to show that you miss me, even a little.. that our 3 year relationship meant something. We ended our relationship so nicely, i dont understand why you've had to be so cold towards me recently. Not speaking to you has helped me a lot and I'll continue the no contact because it's the only way I can remain sane. I know you're off with other girls, I know the type of guy you are when you're single and that's ok, I just hope you dont forget about me too fast because I'll never forget you