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cristal

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  1. Well said as usual Superdave! Your posts have helped a lot of people get through the raw pain of their breakups.
  2. Wow, this made me cry! You really poured your heart and soul out here. I sincerely hope you find peace and comfort. I can really relate to some of this since parts of this are identical to my last relationship. We are rooting for you. Hold your head up.
  3. This is one of my favorite threads. I especially like the part that states "that love does not die of starvation, but from indigestion". I try to apply the lessons of this thread to my daily life. Great thread!
  4. Great post as always Majord! Somehow I overlooked it. I can relate a lot to it, since I am now in that place.
  5. I do not care what people think. As long as I have o'kayed it with me.
  6. Sadie, closure should come from his actions. Remember that old cliche that actions speaks louder than words? It is still true. I had a similar situation happened to me where he disappeared after a 4 month relationship, without bothering to break it off. That was almost 4 months ago. I was devastated. The first 3 months, I thought the pain would never end. But I held my held high, hung on tightly to my pride and dignity and and never once called or e-mailed him. He called me twice during that period and I was polite, but I never initiated contact. And I never will. For me, it is all about self-respect. As Blender so succintly put it, "you have to separate your feelings from facts". The fact is, that he knows how to contact you and he is not making the effort. You have to get your closure from his actions. Sometimes thats all that you have. Trust me if he was thinking about you and wanted to be with you, he would have moved mountains to do so. The fact that he isn't doing that, speaks volume about how he feels about you. For your own sanity, make peace with it in your mind, and do not contact him. Any actions on your part will breed desperation and that my friend is very unattractive. Maintain No Contact until you regain control of your emotions, and if necessary, I would say maintain No Contact forever. He is not worth it the dime. Good luck!
  7. Can you apply for some kind of emergency help from the government to tide you over in the meantime?
  8. I know what you mean about the ex name. It was a name I hardly cared for or even noticed. Now it seems as if everywhere I go, everyone and everything is called by that name. I have wondered if I am the only one with that revelation. Go figure!
  9. Firedancer. I have been on the NC diet for the last 3 months. Your post gives me hope that one day this pinining will end. I agree that Superdave, Blender and Majord has kept me functioning with the NC mantra. Great success story!
  10. Thanks for all of your replies. I agree with every response here. He certainly was not the right guy for me, otherwise, I would not have to ask for things such as phone calls. He definitely was not into me.
  11. If you are not getting your needs met in a not so great relationship, do you think by telling your partner your true feelings will scare them away? For example more time together, or more phone calls. I told my partner that he was not calling often enough and he headed for the hills.
  12. "I believe you need to know who you are before the love can flow". Well said, onelastgo! Tough life experiences helps to build character. Often pride and self admiration often results in self-love.
  13. Yes, I do like myself, and would hate being anyone else. I have been one of those fortunate ones that was blessed with a ton of healthy self-esteem. I would even take it further and declare that I do love myself. I do have issues with physical flaws, but I have learned to make peace with them and love myself warts and all.
  14. Hi Alfonselaca, I too was in a relationship that lasted 4 months. The chemistry was intense and when I asked for more, he disappeared. I still miss him. I conclude from your post, that this guy is not really into you. It sucks when you like them and they do not return your feelings. When you told him that you like him and he gave you that look, I think it was because he did not feel the same about you and was somewhat surprised that you still harbored those feelings. And ditto for why he never came out of the truck to kiss you. He was low on urgency and desire. If I were you, I would cease all contact and try to get over him. If he has a change of mind, he knows where to find you. Let him come to you. If he does not, at least you will be on the path to recovery. I am applying everything that I said to you to my own life. It is the only was to preserve your dignity. It is depressing and painful as hell, but it is the only way. Good luck!
  15. I have 3 months of No Contact - except for 2 times initiated by him and somedays, I felt as if I have pushed the rewind button back to day one. To me getting over someone somedays, appear to me as cruel and inhumane punishment. The one step forward 20 step backward rollercoaster ride of emotions, left me with the feeling that I might be trapped in the horrible pits of hell forever.
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