Confessoress

Never begged, no. Since that will just turn someone off completely. Hoped, yes... been in personal silent emotional turmoil, yes.

For me I'd say it was almost dead on 6 months into the relationship.

Agreed. In my experience if you pull away yourself and let him chase you AND he comes back, then he obviously wants the relationship. If he doesn't... well you know the answer. Prolonging the relationship is pointless if it's just delaying the envitable.

Not meeeee. Is there something wrong with not being a virgin? I've been in 3 serious relationships, 2 of which lasted 3 years each. I slept with them. And my current boyfriend who I've been with 1 year. Now, I admit I wish I'd only slept with my current BF because he's the one I want to be with the rest of my life... but I can't change the past. So there we have it.

You don't need to lose that much weight at all. Atkins is horrid, dangerous. Personally I think slim fast is better and safer, for losing a few lbs. 1 shake in the morning, snack on fruits, rice cakes and other stuff inbetween, another shake for lunch, few more snacks, then a proper dinner, and some more snacks after! This is not good for long term, but to lose a few lbs I think it's perfectly fine.

Marriage is not a guarantee you'll stay together either! I personally believe living together before marriage is VERY important. You learn A LOT about the person living together and it can change your mind whether you really want to spend your life with that person.

1 year until I said it... and as for hearing it still waiting...

lilac, it sounds like you've been through a lot. Honestly if you don't want one please don't. I can imagine what problems that will cause but only you have the rest of your life to live, as I say they won't be around forever. You have to do what makes you happy. It really gets me mad that Indian families migrate here and then don't intergrate into the culture. I lived in Asia 3 years and I adjusted to the culture. I certainly won't say to my kids if I lived there "Hey you can't date a local person. No no they have to be white and British". It's so terribley unfair to the children. My boyfriend has told me he's told them he doesn't want to have an arranged marriage. His ex was white and hell she even lived with them. But they won't put up with it again. I think that has made his family less tolerate to a girl outside of Indian culture.

*sigh* lilac_indi, I feel for you. My BF is Brit Indian. I'm white. His sister and brother have had an arranged marriage, he doesn't want one. They'd be much happier if he had one. They don't know about me. I think you have to do what is right for you. Your parents won't be around forever. You'll be the one living the rest of your life, not them. Arranged marriages can work, but only if you want one.

It is a cultural issue. His sister also had an arranged marriage. However, my boyfriend has told me he does NOT want an arranged marriage and he has very much told his family he wants to be with the person he chooses. Chooses, interesting word... that he chooses to fit their mold? Very contridictory. His sister and brother agreed to an arranged marriage. If he could tell them about his ex, he can do the same for me. I think he's trying to avoid a "I told you so" from his parents.

I feel really excluded. This is a major factor. He tells me all the things he's doing with his family. And it just starts to dig further and further into my gut. When he talks about his Sister and how great she is I now get extremely jealous and resentful, not that he knows that. I mean... he plays games on is games console with her (and his brother-in-law). They watch movies together, hang out, go out for meals, go shopping together and do all the things I want to do with him. I resent they get to see him all the time and I don't. I want to be part of it too. His brother had is arranged marriage 2 weeks ago. It goes on for a few days. He's had loads of family from Canada staying over. So I was even more hush hush then. When we see each other, it's just me and him sneaking around to hotels. No interaction with the people in his life. His best friend knows about me, it's just his family. In fact when I went up there last week and we meet some people for this film... they asked "So are you guys boyfriend and girlfriend or..." I just looked at my boyfriend, I wondered, but he replied "We are boyfriend and girlfriend". This really is just a family issue. I don't know how much longer I should put up with this. Then this morning, I get this: I'm at the end of my rope, so to speak. Of course I don't mind him spending time with his family, but I'm sick of this lying.

Hey all. 1 year and a couple of months we've been together. As for seeing each other. He obviously changed his mind since then because we've seen each other twice since then. I had work, which is probably why. He thought I should be concerntrating on sorting myself before seeing each other. He was probably right. But anyway...

I just thought about this today. As some of you may know, my boyfriend hasn't told his parents about me. I got to thinking today about myself. I'm going to list aspects of myself, and you put yourself in their shoes and tell me what you'd think of me if you were them. Both good and bad aspects. I'm 22 years old. I live with my Dad in a small apartment, he's a taxis driver. I don't come from a wealthy family. We do not own property. I don't have a stable job at the moment. I did not go to university. I do not have a degree. I don't drive and I don't have a car. I did however get my provisional license a couple of weeks ago. I don't smoke and very rarely do I drink. I lived in Asia for 3 years, I like different cultures and races and adjust well. I'm a good cook. I'm well-spoken, have good manners, friendly, helpful and well dressed. I'm family orientated. I have a few minor qualifications. I am trying, I don't give up. I'm over-weight. I love their son and want what's best for him (although you could argue I'm not good for him). I'm shy. I don't know what career I want, if I want one at all. I would learn their first language and culture happily.?

Not to be general, but that does seem to my experience. Only problem is I've hit the family issue because I'm not as well educated and lacking career. But oh well.