Queenb0231607306448

I need some objective thoughts. I hope someone can help me out. I have been talking to this guy for a month. We get along really well and have a very good time together. The only thing, a big thing at that, is that he has made it clear to me that he does not want a relationship with anyone for two reasons: 1. His last girlfriend of 10 months cheated on him the whole entire time and he does not want to risk another heartbreak and 2. He does not want to live by any expectations, at this point. Alright fine...i can understand that. But, recently his phone calls have lessened and we have not been going out on any dates. He comes over on the weekends, but we haven't been going out. I mentioned the idea to him and he told me that he needed to pay of a debt and he definatley was not going to take any girl out if he wasnt going out himself.....OUCH! He is cool with staying in with me, but at this point, shouldn't we be doing the courtship thing??? OH, an important piece of information I failed to mention...No, we have not had sex, nor does he really try. He knows that I will not have sex with him until he is ready to commit to me. Anyway, i am not sure of what to think. He kinda has a whatever happens happens kind of attitude. I am not sure if he is seeing anyone else; although, he has told me that he is not actively seeking to hook up with other people. I do know he is very busy and his time during the week is very limited. He works 15 hour days.. On the weekend he is with me for the majority of the time. Does this make sense? Can someone shed some light on this situation? Thanks Queenb

I am so sorry but that is absolutely some terrible advise. If you allow him to disrespect you once he will do it twice. Respect is something that is developed over time. You dont just wake up the next day and have respect for a person when there was no respect to begin with. Maybe he is sorry......or maybe he is sorry he got caught. In any rate, it is your relationship and ultimatley your decision that you have to live with.... all i have to say is if you dont have respect in your relationship now, dont think it is going to get any better.....ITS NOT!

Hey, I have read that guys (and gals) go through a stage known as the uncertainty stage, which is perfectly normal. They kinda pull away for awhile to figure out if the relationship is what he really wants. Your job would be to let him have his space and if and when he comes back around welcome him openly and warmly. If you show anger towards him, he will quickly become discourage and run the other way. You also have to remember there is that chance that he may decide the relationship is not what he wants, but from the sounds of things, i think things will work out for your advantage. Hope this helps. You may want to check our men are from mars and women are from venus dating. It is a great book. Queenb