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bleeder

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About bleeder

  • Birthday 10/02/1971

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  1. My condolences to her family and loved ones. My shock hasn't dissipated. I hope that she may find peace.
  2. You may be right Puppeteer, but you are just covering one side of the coin here. Giving you the benefit of the doubt, yes, you could have been the one guilty of giving your wife the cold shoulder. You might not have paid enough attention to detail especially when it comes to talking or listening. But ask yourself this : If the communication link between the two of you was so bad, why did she not make a move to remedy the situation? Having an affair may be an outlet, but it is by no means a solution. Don't beat yourself up more than what you are responsible for. At least you are aware of your behavior now, so look towards the future. I am not sure if you are still together with her, but it takes a huge amount of forgiveness to overlook an affair. I wish you the very best.
  3. Hi Happytown, I have read your post. Although I am rather taken back with this lady's behavior, but it comes as no big surprise either. She is a rare breed of women, yes, rare; but not impossible to find. Women like these have only one objective in mind. To play and toy with the emotions of others. To compliment (to nurture perhaps?) their inner sense of self-doubt and to provide some comfort for their inadequacies. They'd love to tease, only to back out at the critical moment. Generally, people like that have a low self esteem. They may even be beautiful, but psychologically, they are one living black hole filled with nothing substantial but void. I am glad that you are off the hook. You are better off investing your time with someone more worthwhile. A lady like that will just pave the road to her own emotional destruction.
  4. I am quite taken aback by your boyfriend's attitude, but I guess that he has his own way of seeing things. His thoughts are along the lines of "sin now only to prevent you from sinning later" or to that effect. I am not sure if it is a foolproof solution to prevent adultery in the future, but I am very sure that it is not something which any loving boyfriend would want their girlfriend to do. From my vantage point, I see it as an excuse for him to sleep with other women as well. Like what Blue Skittles have mentioned, this is not a healthy relationship. Some serious work needs to be done. Secondly, as for things with that married colleague of yours, please do stop the hanky pankies before things really get out of hand. Your boyfriend may have certain values, but I am certain that you have yours to keep too. You would not feel guilty for kissing another man if your principles were not compromised. Hope I have helped.
  5. It is hard to judge based on just a simple stare for now. One thing for sure is that you still matter to him in certain amounts. Just ignore those looks he's giving out for now and concentrate on your music. If he wants to talk, he would approach you and perhaps you would get some insight on his behaviour. Till then, just leave it be.
  6. I would say that she has some hidden agendas. Be wary, but don't totally give up on her as yet. Give her some time, and see if she confesses to anything; for my best guess is that she is either seeing someone on the side, or is not ready for a commitment for now.
  7. I have the book, and I have read it. I must admit that Robert Greene's in depth knowledge of the human psyche can be a little startling, if not unnerving. Most of the advice given in the book can be larger than life, so to speak, but it helps greatly in helping one understand the different types of human persona. His tactics are good, but when it comes down to the wire, it is all about the individual and how he or she manipulates their significant other. I strongly believe that everyone falls into many categories as described in the book. No one person is truly a rake, a libertine etc. It makes manipulation much more trickier, but with the right knowledge and moves, I sure that you'd be able to utilize the book to your full advantage. Cheers!
  8. This is totally wrong. Incest is not a trivial matter. Tell your friend to make a firm stand, and prevent any sexual relations with his sister in future. Not only are the end results damaging biologically, it can cause some serious damage psychologically. He has to get out. Before it is all too late.
  9. No army of demons can march through the gates, if they weren't open in the first place. Do what you must; walk away before it's too late. Our acts are based on our consciousness and governed by our conscience. You are not helpless in this, and don't let human weaknesses cause you further misery. Cherish your boyfriend, and live a guilt free relationship.
  10. I do understand what you're saying. It is not an easy task trying to look for oneself. We have so many thoughts and directions that sometimes, it seems easier to understand others than to understand ourselves. But never give up. The harder the toil, the sweeter the victory. Always remind yourself that. As far as counsellors go, they can help to a certain extent, but at the end of the day, it is always the same old words. The true work lies with you. Be strong, and never give up. I am sure you would reap the fruits of independence soon enough.
  11. You are most welcome. I am sure that there are better men besides him who are more deserving of your attention. Don't stop looking.
  12. Hi Ariyadhana, There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who regard their worth based on the number of friends or lovers they have, or, those who judge their worth based on their confidence and their own accomplishments. Do not look for yourself in others, you'd never find yourself there. True, we may find good friends every once in a while, but ultimately friends would just be friends, they cannot fill that gaping hole. They are not you. Sometimes, it pays to be selfish and to look inwards for awhile. Try to understand your strengths and your weaknesses. Work doubly hard on your weaknesses and improve on them. For your strengths, use it to your advantage, whether it applies to work or making a stand for yourself in society. People would see you very differently when they know that your self-belief isn't easily broken. I hope that my little banter here helped you in some way. To be truly independent, is to believe in yourself. That's the first step.
  13. Hi Serena, It seems like this man is unsure of himself, to begin with. A confident man would never jerk anyone around, one with good morals intact that is. Someone sure of himself would signal a clear-cut direction where relationships are concerned, it is either a YES or a NO. No 'Doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde' role playing when it comes to a man with a good dose of self esteem. To safeguard yourself from any further hurt, I'd advice you to walk away now. A relationship can never blossom when doubts and fear are always in play.
  14. Hi Dopeysgirl, I would advice you to be on your guard. Him having sex with you doesn't prove anything much at this point in time. There are a few possible reasons I can cite, but take it with a pinch of salt, for I am not him definitely! One, he may be seeking you out for convenience sake, since you did mention that he is not seeing anyone at all. Two, he may be searching for feelings for you, thus engaging in sex to see if there's any true substance for him to go on with. Boricua did state something true, and it is mostly true for most men. They can have sex without any emotional ties involved. In your case, I am sincerely hoping that it isn't. Whatever it is, be careful of how much feelings you are investing in him, till you are absolutely sure of how he feels. Talk to him soon, that's the best solution for now.
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