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Rickster

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  1. Rickster
    SuperDave... May I ask whether you have some days where you think about your ex and get emotional about your past and the stupid things you've done, even after so long? I just wonder whether someone like you with such strong inspirational words and great belief in your actions have such feelings. I still do get one of these days that just come by, I don't mind it, it reminds me of the one thing I was proud of back then.
  2. Rickster
    Take as long as you need with NC. Once you've realised that you can't be concerned for her like before it should be alright. I wish you the best.
  3. Rickster
    ebsmith1, I hate to hear people breaking up, it reminds me of mine. I feel quite sorry for you, especially when it's a relationship that was very loving. Sometimes I just can't see why people are not content with what they already have and take things for granted. I would believe that NC works for anyone, whether it be male or female. But NC is meant for you to give you time to think about mistakes and how you can improve yourself. Maybe the best thing for you to do is to not be so pushy and clingy. It's the one thing that killed my contact with my ex. Just remember he's not with you anymore, he's entitled to do anything he wants.
  4. Rickster
    This was what I always fell for at first. I had good conversations with my ex and then the next time we contact I would feel down because it wasn't what I had expected. I feel as long as you don't make anything of the conversation and have no expectations then you should be alright. It's a common error people make, and that's why a lot of people are adviced to stick to NC. But if you're strong enough to conquer that, then there be no need or worrying. Torn&Tattered, just don't assume and over-analyze your conversation, let it be.
  5. Rickster
    DeviantOne, really loved your poem... The poem described the situation I once was in. My scar hasn't faded away yet and I don't think it ever will. But it's a good poem, and I feel your emotions. If it's ok to ask... how did you loose your loved one?
  6. Rickster
    To me I don't believe in closure letters. If you want to tell someone something, why not tell them face to face or in voice. Written words are emotionless. If she wants to talk then let her talk. Let her do what she wants. As I said, NC to me was just the short period to give myself so that I can think without any frustration and anger. It made me think about her feelings, what she wants best, and what I could do to please her wants, and analyze the situation. My goal is to ultimately make her happy, and I can only do that if I give her what she wants. What can I do if she wants away from me? The hurt will go away once you realise this. Well it did for me atleast. But I must admit, it took a long time for me to realise it. I used to be afraid of talking to her, because of many reasons, like fear of saying something wrong, fear or hearing something else from what I was expecting, fear of rejection, and over analyzing things, I hated to over analyze things. But as time past, and realizing that I need to be myself if there is any chance she's going to get back with me, I grew not to fear my fears. I can tell you everytime hear the beeps in the dialtone my palms got sweaty, and if I had a good conversation I would jump in joy, if I had a bad conversation my heart would crumble. I guess what I'm trying to say is just be yourself, do what you want to do, and don't be afraid of saying or doing what you want to do. If they are going to love you again, they need to know the true you. If you feel NC is good for you, then do it. If you feel the need to talk to her, then do it.
  7. Rickster
    Well now that I read it the situation isn't what I had expected. I recon you need time to think about this yourself. I remember the days when I refused to do NC, and people kept saying NC was good cause it kept your mind away from him/her. NC worked differently for me, it gave me ample time to think about stuff I could have possibly done wrong, in a calm state. And that's why my period of NC's were considered short and cut up into many segments. I think you should tell him to stop kissing you and telling you "I love you". Tell him that both of you are already separated. Give yourself and himself time to think about what you want and what he wants with NC. And when you do contact him, find out what he really is and his true character. I'm sorry I'm no expert... But this is my opinion.
  8. Rickster
    Well, my ex doesn't talk to me unless I initiate it first. But it's still something so I'm happy with what I've got. Sunflowereyes best thing to do now is just leave it that way. Think of it this way... For now you are best friends with him and communication is still open. If something develops out of this then so be it, but if nothing doesn't, atleast you know you've retained your friendship status. It's a win win situation. And maybe this is the time you're starting to get to know each other again, and he doesn't want to jump into the relationship too fast.
  9. Rickster
  10. Rickster
    I know this sounds abit odd. But do you really love him? Or do you just see him as a companion? It sounds like as if there's no real understanding between you two. I may be wrong.
  11. Rickster
    Me? SuperDave, I'm really no inspiration to others like how you are with the rest of these people seeking advice. But if you and everyone really wanted to know what I did. Well... the answer is simply nothing... like what you've always said. I'm not back with her, but we do occasionally talk on the phone, and figuring out what really happened made me more relieved because atlast I knew what my mistakes were. I figured that I can't make her happy by not letting her have what she wants, and I accept that. She tells me she prefers life now, and I'm happy for her, although not for myself. But I'm fine. There you go, I'm really neither happy nor sad. I guess some people may disagree with what I do, but people have different tolerances and mindsets. SuperDave thanks for asking. I would love to hear from your experience now.
  12. Rickster
    Air Supply - I'm All Out Of Love I'm lying alone with my head on the phone Thinking of you till it hurts I know you hurt too but what else can we do Tormented and torn apart I wish I could carry your smile and my heart For times when my life feels so low It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring When today doesn't really know, doesn't really know I 'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you I know you were right believing for so long I 'm all out of love, what am I without you I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong I want you to come back and carry me home Away from this long lonely nights I'm reaching for you, are you feeling it too Does the feeling seem oh so right And what would you say if I called on you now And said that I can't hold on There's no easy way, it gets harder each day Please love me or I'll be gone, I'll be gone
  13. Rickster
    Hi SuperDave. Yeah Im still here. How are you doing now? Im doing pretty average at the moment. Ive sorted some things out. Wouldn't say Im happy nor sad. Not heard from you in a while, what have you been doing?
  14. Rickster
    I glad you guys liked it and could relate to it. It's not made up or anything, so I found it quite easy to write. I highly doubt I could write another poem as I'm not exactly sure what else to write. But once again thanks. But I've been reading alot of poems here and I do enjoy them, sometimes it makes my heart feel all so heavy and I start to think about things again.
  15. Rickster
    Hi, this is my first poem I've ever written. It's about my ex a year and a half ago and I've never really gotten over it till now. I hope you guys understand my feelings. I think this is the only poem I'll ever write as I don't normally pen down my feelings. Mods, I'm sorry if my poem has a swear word, but it's my feelings. Since you've been gone, Laughter doesn't seem to work anymore And for the depression, It's like a sore thumb I just can't ignore Since you've been gone, My heart beats a different pace And for the memories, The memories bring tears to my face Since you've been gone, I reflect upon life and the rejection I never understood why, My mind dwells on this damn unanswered question? Since you've been gone, Smiling has never been this easy to fake It forms new relationships, but I fear them, It reminds me way too much of this burning heartache Since you've been gone, You never once looked back I'm not sure how the heck you do it, It's like nothing happened and everything's intact Since you've been gone, I've always felt like this, I'm not sure why And although the void still remains, I'm happy to let you be
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