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nemo_lost

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  1. Hi everybody. My girlfriend and I have been going for about 1.5 yrs now, so everything is pretty strong and secure. There is one thing that has been bugging me for a while, and I want to see what people think about it. FYI, we have an open relationship, and talk about anything bugging us so it doesn't get bottled in. Everytime we want to do something, it seems that her ideas stem from her relatioship with her last boyfriend. For instance, when we want to go for dinner, we usually have thai food. But the thing is that she has mentioned before how happy she was her ex intorduced her to thai food and that its her favorite food now. Other examples: let's go on a trip? she picked a place that she had a 2 wk romantic vacation with him. ideas for a sunday? taking pictures around boston harbor, which she has done before for fun with this guy. go to museum? see exhibits where the displays were designed by him (not the artwork, just the presentation). watch a movie? she has tried to make me a huge fan of a couple movies that he introduced to her and he loves. SO ANNOYING! But I deal with it, and don't read into it too much. I don't always go through with the ideas, but it is starting to get frustrating. Any thoughts? Opinions? Thanks.
  2. hi everyone! when a guy tells a girl that he thinks he loves her more than she loves him... what is he really saying? ladies, what would you think if you heard your guy say something like that to you?
  3. hi everyone, here's my deal. i love having sex with my girlfriend but i'm wondering if i'm reading into some things too much. are there times when you just have a feeling you'll have fun but not cum no matter what your guy does? the other day we were having sex and i could tell she enjoyed the sensations but that it just wasn't going to happen, and she turned to focusing on me and what i'd like for me to get off. kind of freaked me out that she might not be happy. i've heard this happens though, so i'm wondering if the ladies out there can verify: are you disappointed with your partner when you don't get an orgasm? also, does it matter HOW a woman gets off? for example, i find i can easily get her to cum by fingering but she rarely gets off during intercourse. aside form my insecurity of not doing the job the way nature intended, is there a difference in sensation or are all types equally fulfilling? finally, i don't cum every time i have sex. and sometimes i lose my erection and can't get it back up. i sure this is disappointing, but is this common. like i said, this is only sometimes, not most of the time. fyi i'm 32 and don't have the raging teenage hormones. i guess i'm new to what ladies might expect, or understand is normal, in the bedroom. should i be going into the bedroom without expectations of everything being perfect?
  4. Hi Everyone. So Here Is My Dilemma. I've Been Seeing This Girl For A Few Months And Everything Is Going Great. I Was Over Her Place A Little While Ago When I Was Commenting On Some Of The Photos On Her Wall. Two Of The Pictures Struck Me As Really Nice. For One Of Them I Asked If She Took It And She Said "yes." The Other One She Said "no." So I Asked Where She Got It And She Said An Ex. She Asked Me If That Made Me Feel Unconfortable And I Said No, She Should Feel Comfortable To Express Herself In Her Home As She Pleases. Especially Since Im Not Living There Or Anything. She Still Said She Didnt Want For Me To Feel Awkward Anyway And Took It Down And Replaced It. Here's The Weird Part. Her Ex Was A Professional Photographer And He Has His Entire Portfolio Online For People To Purchase Pictures From. The One Picture Where She Said "yes" She Took It Is Among That Collection! Just To Make Sure I Compared The Two One More Time And They Are A Spot On Match. How Should I Read Into This, Or Should I Read Into It At All? I Would Rather She Didnt Take Either Down Or Left Both Up, But Not To Act Like She Did Something Nice While All The While One Of This Last Guy's Pics Is Still On The Wall!?!? What Do You Think?
  5. hi everyone, my girl and i have known each other for 4 months, and things are going incredably well. we make time to travel and see each other and we are totally in sync. one problem is that recently we have become a bit 'snippy' on the phone with each other. we talk a couple of hours every night beore we go to sleep, but recently we are reading into a pause before some word, for example. or saying "what's wrong?" becuase someone said something slightly differently than usual. each little inflection is weirding us out. my undertanding is that this is common, but i'm trying to understand why this happens and how to handle it. we both acknowledged it which i think is so important, but we are getting frustrated at the distance. any thought on why this is happening? any advice on how to deal with it? thanks for listening.
  6. Thanks everyone for your opinion! I thought that copying what she wrote me might shed some light on what I'm trying to interpret, so here it is. "Forgot to mention that last night I bumped into my friend [name], my former yoga instructor. He works at another class now and it's been soooo long since I've seen him. You might have seen some emails and messages from him to me. Anyway... sooo we caught up for a little bit and I told him about you and that I'm happy and in love. He seemed really happy for me! So anyway, there's really no reason that I am telling you this. I just don't want to hide anything from you. And if you see [name] writing me you know who he is."
  7. i guess my thought is if she felt guilty or something, or didn't want me to read into in more than she'd like, then she would do what she said. i have nad no reason to think she hasn't been honest with me in our relatioship. but if it's all innocent why would it be a big deal it all. does that make sense? am i getting paranoid, or is the idea of her talking to another guy taking over my common sense? so confused.
  8. hi everyone, my girlfriend was telling me today that she bumped into her yoga instructor (very handsome & sexy, straight, single, popular with the ladies) and that she hadn't seen in a couple of months becuase he works at a different place now. she said she wanted to tell me becuase she doesn't want to hide anything, and so i'd recognize his name in case he emails her or something. she said she told him about us and how much she really likes me, etc. overall i'm a little weirded out, though i totally played it cool with her. to be honest i'd rather not know. so ladies, my question if i should feel secure or not. would you metnion something like that out of the blue to your boyfriend? would you do something like that if you truly want to be totally honest with your guy? how should i interperet this? thanks!
  9. Hi Everyone. I'm Wondering How To Handle This Situation With My Gf's Ex. Right Now He's Out Of The Picture, They Broke Up A Few Months Ago And Haven't Been In Touch. But The Thing Is That She Was Deeply In Love With Him, That He Never Felt The Same Back, And That He Broke Up With Her. On Top Of That I've Been Made Aware That They Had Amazing Sex, And That She Still Has Gifts Of His At Her Place Out In The Open. He Still Lives Right Around The Corner Whereas I Have To Travel A Little To Be With Her. Botom Line Is I Can't Help But Feel Insecure That Somehow This Other Guy Is Irreplacable. First, I Need To Know If I Should Ever Show Concern Or Insecurity At All (is It A Turn Off)? Do I Just Suck It Up Or What? I'm So Confused And Heed Guidance. I Tell Her I Have A Lot Of Things To Do Sometimes Just So I Don't Talk To Her, Otherwise I Get Weird And Quiet Becuase I'm Preopccupied With These Thoughts. I'm Having Trouble Dealing With The Jealousy And Paranoia That They Might Bump Into Eachother And Sparks May Fly. I Know All These Scenarios Are In My Head But I Need Help! Thanks For Listening!
  10. Hi Everyone: My Girl And I Talk, A Lot! And We Never Get Sick Of It. She Tells Me All The Time How She Could Talk To Me Forever. I Used To Think That Was Great, But Now Im Wondering If There Might Be Other Things Lacking. Maybe Its All In My Head. Anyway, I Wanted To See What The Ladies Out There Had To Say About This. Is This A Good Thing That She Feels Like She Can Tell Me Anything? Is It Hard For A Woman To Reach That Point With A Guy, And Does It Signal To You That Its The Type Of Guy You Could Be With Long-term? My Other Question Is How Important Is Sex To Women? Do You Need It All The Time Or Does It Depend On The Woman? Would You Rather Be In Love With Ok-sex Or Have Little Emotional Attachment With Great Sex? Im Concerned Becuase It Think Our Sex Life Is Only So-so, But I Know She And Her Last Bloke Had Great Sex! It Makes Me Uneasy And I Don't Know What To Do To Improve It. I Feel Inferior. Any Advice? Thanks So Much!!!!!! - Nemo
  11. thanks everyone for the advice! i haven't overdone it with the gifts, but i do understand what everyone is talking about. a couple thoughtful small items, and last time i saw her i gave flowers (for the first time). but since we don't see each other all the time, it'd be ncie to give her something small. i think she'd like that i'm thinking of her like that while i'm not with her. usually we just spend time together and try to value our time together as much as possible. it's not about buying her stuff, just looking for ideas on small affectionate gifts. thanks!
  12. anyone have gift suggestions for someone you've just started a relationship with? i've gotten her a couple of thoughful spontaneous gifts and flowers before, but i'm just looking for some unique ideas that will make her heart melt. any ideas?!?!
  13. Thank you everyone for your replies! After reading through them I guess my questions are better defined as: (a) Does really enjoying sex go hand-in-hand with promiscuity? (b) Any advice on how to overcome my insecurity of not being able to satisfy her? Do DVDs and things like that work? If so, any suggestions? I'm a newbie at becoming better at sex, usually it was just basic stuff for a while now. I don't plan on telling her how I feel, confidence is at stake in her eyes. But she is important to me so I'd like to learn more and make sex a better experience for both of us.
  14. Hi everyone, I've been seeing this girl for a couple of months now and we're becoming more comfortable talking with each other now. The other night I asked if she considers herself a "sexual" person and without hesitation and very comfortably said yes. When we have sex she seems very "educated," and I find myself lost sometimes. She is a bit kinky. I'm wondering if I have any cause for concern? Do you consider yourself sexual/kinky, and does that mean that your eye wanders away from your guy from time to time, or is it the guy you're in a relationship with the one you want to have sex with (even if it's not fireworks every time)? I guess I'm feeling a bit insecure but I don't want to show her that. Any advice? Thx!
  15. Any thoughts or ideas on how to surprise someone you're in a long-distance relationship with? After relying on phone calls and emails, and the occasional sending of flowers, are there any other ways you can do things for a boyfriend/girlfriend from a distance?
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