topliner1607306444

Personally I agree with it as why should one suffer so much pain when they know they will be in pain till the day they die.. I dont think it will ever be legalised becuase of the insurance companies afterall the government dont really care about our health and well being. This is a money orientated society we live in and unfortunately thats the way it will be. I used to work in a hospital as an IT engineer and i was asked at the end of the year did i want a few computers and laptops for home. I asked "what do u mean?". I was told it was coming to the end of the financial year and they needed to spend all their budget so as to get the same money for the next year. I said can the surplus of the 32,000 not be put into patient care instead of lining our pockets. 32,000 was spent on IT personnel wining and dining, new computers for their homes. I was disgusted and left the job. Money is the root of all evil.

Hi, About 9 months ago i was really hurt by an ex girlfriend. We were supposed to get married, kids etc.. but she went off with someone else and it took me along time to get over but i finally got over it. Last week I met a girl whom i used to date in my teenage years. We never split up that time over any row or disagreement, it was just that i was moving location and i guess we were young as well. When i met her all the feelings of love came back to me for her and she accepted to go out on a date. The date went well, we kissed, and we agreed to do it again sometime. Yesterday i text her saying that i hope she wasnt to busy with work and that to come out with me again sometime and she responded with "i'll let you know". I dont know if that means she'll let me know whether she wants to or not, or, it means, she'll let me know when. Normally i wouldnt be paranoid like this, but since the break up of my previous relationship, i have lost a lot of self confidence and get paranoid very easily. I really want to ask this girl out for a steady relationship but am afraid I'll put her off. I really like her and would love to spend alot of time with her but am gettin the feelin thats not what she wants. How am i gettin this feeling - paranoia i guess. Please help, what shall i do?

No no, im not blaming myself!! I was just saying i wish i had have told him that before he committed suicide. Thats why im put the post up to help those that: 1) Who are feeling like that now; or 2) Have never experienced them feelings but may do in the future. Tony.

I have posted a fair few messages on here, mostly about myself being hurt by being dumped by my girlfriend just over 4 weeks now. Yeah, it still hurts a little but not as much and am feeling much much better than I did when we both split. Time does heal - people dont say this just to make you feel better but they say it cause its the TRUTH. My friend got dumped last week and got so down and depressed at what happened. He seen no future. He seen his life as over. It was late at night when he got dumped, he felt alone, he was afraid to contact anyone. He couldnt handle it. We buried him yesterday. He took his own life and has left behind friends that are hurting and a family that will never be the same again. If you have never been so depressed by a relationship breakup or you are going through it now, please remember TIME WILL HEAL and you will be completely free of the bad emotions. You wont see it at the time but its true. The pain, the hurt, the emptiness, the loneliness will go away, completely and forever! Dont bottle up your feelings. No matter what time of the day or night it is tell someone exactly how you are feeling and that you need help. We all need help now and again. Dont be afraid. Ask for it and you will get it. Sometimes I think us men seem to hide alot of emotions because we are living up to this stupid image of "Big boys dont cry" - We are all human and all can be as fragile as each other. But time does heal, things DO get brighter. I hope this post helps. I just wish i had explained this to my friend!! Tony.

Hi Sean, Looks like we have a few things in common. My ex dumped me exactly 3 weeks ago too. She now has another boyfriend and it still really annoying me and hurting me. In fact, i just learned earlier this week, that she had been seing him behind my back. This is the girl that i was getting engaged to this valentines. So you can imagine how i feel. But one thing i know, is that she is not good enough for me. I was brought up in a good family and have respect and decency. Attributes that she doesnt have. Im way too good for her and in time, my heart will heal and in a months time i'll look back and be glad to get this bad news out of my life. Sean, she is playing mind games with you and is using you! She wants her cake and eat it but she doesnt deserve one slice! You need to stay away from her, dont phone her and dont take calls from her, just dont be friends. She is f*cking your head up now! Put a stop to this, get away from her, well far away! Like you im a guitar player as well! I know its hard to concentrate on playing the guitar but you should keep at it as it will help keep your mind away from that tramp. Feel free to drop an email. We'll get through this. We'll share guitar tricks and tablature - keep our minds occupied with the better things in life. I have a home studio and record for alot of different local bands but my main influences are Steve vai, Joe Satriani and Gary Moore. I recently bought an Ibanez Jem, steve vai model. Email: email removed Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland.

Well from the day that we split ive generally been getting better a bit day by day until today. I found out today that she was seeing this other fella from the start of december right up until we finshed. She is now in a serious relationship with him. How the helll can anyone do this??? Its just sent me back to square one, i cant think, i cant eat, this is really tearing me apart and too be honest its scaring me. I was used, treated like crap, and badly hurt. I always treat a woman well. In fact I always kept to my own rule "Treat other women the way I would like a man to treat my sister". My mates were around today chatting with me just saying forget about that lying tramp, she's bad news, you are better off without her. I know that now, but it still hurts. I cant function at all. You know, i was just trying to get over it the first week, then i got the slap in the face a week later hearing that she has met someone else so soon, and then now another week later i find out she was cheating on me and using me. Every week theres always another slap in the face. I feel im rambling on her. Truth is my head is all over the place right now. Any advice/help will be greatly appreciated. Tony, 27,Ireland

You shouldnt be with someone thats married, full stop!!! Even if you dont like your cousin, what you are doing is totally wrong. In fact, your message has quite annoyed me knowing that there are people out there that are doing this. You must end it immediately. I usually offer a lot more advice but i cant be sympathetic with you, im too damn angry at the way you treat people.

I know how you feel. I was hurt by a similar situation. He has lied to you so much that you cant trust him. You have told him it hurts you and he still continues to lie to you and disrespect your wishes to better the relationship. It sounds like he wants his cake and eat it. Well, he doesnt deserve one slice, he's a liar and a cheat. You day he's cheater before with someone else. Nine times out of ten, he'll do it again. If you'se do stay together you are going to be paranoid all the time, wondering is he seeing her, writing to her, phoning her etc... Dont do this to yourself. Like you, i had big plans, but it didnt happen and never will but i will get over it. You are only 18 and very young. My advice to you, is to end the relationship. He has too much to you, its not worth it. You will meet someone else again and make plans too. It will hurt at the beginning but it gets easier, trust me. I feel you are too good for him. For your benefit, now and in the long run, end the relationship. Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland

Well im glad you are away from New York because by the sounds of it he was just gonna use you for sex! Some of things he was saying were sexually related. He has a girlfriend and he was prepared to cheat on her! Now, do you think you cant do better than that? Do you think all you can have is someone elses boyfriend? Of course not, you are way too good for that! He never done it in front of his girlfriend cause he doesnt want to split with her, but since you were over, he thought he'd have a little fun. And if he had have, the only person that would have been hurt was you! The age difference? Well everyone has different opinions on this but mine is that age doesnt matter within reason! Age is only a number, a statistic, it doesnt determine nor affect true love. Some people are ,alot more mature than others for their age, so sometimes it balances out. At 17 though, i do feel you should date people around your own age to you learn about relationships. He's 26 and much more experienced, thats why he was trying to take advantage of you. He's not a nice person and I feel so sorry for his girlfriend and so should you. You can do better than someone elses boyfriend. Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland

To start of, I am a 27 year old man, and am straight but Ive mates who are gay and lesbian so maybe i can give you some advice. First of all, dont be afraid of the feelings you are feeling. Its all natural. There is certainly nothing wrong with you. While it might be difficult to explain to your friends of the feelings you feel, it might be good for you to talk about it with your closet friend. A true friend who will listen and now bad mouth of. You are who you are, be who you are, if people dont like it, then feck them! If you dont like someone, do you try to be their friend? No. If you like someone well then yes you can be friends with them. Be yourself and be proud of it. You are not harming or hurting anyone. Different people find it hard to find out what they are or why they have the feelings they do. If you feel sexually attracted to women then chances are you are lesbian or bisexual (if you feel sexually attracted to both men and women). My advice to you is go with the flow, do what makes you feel happy. Dont be afraid to talk, it hurts more when you bottle it in, making you feel alone. Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland

It hurting you so much as now he hasnt called and you feel rejected in some way. As i said in my first response, he may just be using you. He's only just married and having a sexual relationship with someone else. I dont know him but i bet my life he is just using you. Im a man and i would never do such a thing but i have mates that have went down that path before and every single one of them ended in disaster and hurt. And if you keep seeing him, you will be the worst off. Why? Cause you will loose your husband, you will loose your bit on the side, and then will loose your mind. Your husband will hurt but he'll get over it quicker as he will see you as a liar and a cheat. The other man will be away happy with his wife and probably be having sex with some other married woman, he'll not care. While you will be left alone and depressed. Im only telling you this for your own good. You must forget about him! You must not contact him! You must not take calls from him! If you want your marriage to work then work on it and seek advice on that!! If you feel your marriage is over then talk to your husband. It is not fair and you know it. While i dont agree with affairs, i do sympathise with you and i know you are genuinely hurt but what im telling you is honest and i do genuinely feel its for the best. There are 4 people at stake here, you, your husband, your neighbour and your neighbours wife. You are now in control, do the right thing for all of them - STAY AWAY!!! Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland

Personally i think that she is half telling the truth. When a girl tells you to end it because you deserve better, well thats just a nice way of saying she totally happy within the relationship. If she really was happy then she wouldnt have said that, why would she hurt herself if she truly loved you? The reason why it has hurt you for a long time is because, in your head, you dont know where u stand and this has been niggling in your mind all the time. I wouldnt start going mad on buying big gifts or booking dinners for valentines day. I would simply ask her, would she be happier back in the relationship with you and then act on her response. The previous poster said "Her reason for leaving was for you to be happier without her but you are not. ". Well I would bet my life on this that this is not true. While it might give you some short term comfort, it will not help you in the long run. Im just being honest. Think about it, if you'se two were still together, would you turn around and say "I think we should break, you deserve better, you will be happier"? No, you wouldnt and nobody would. Its an easy way of saying SHE IS not as happy as she was. Yeah, she might still have some feelings deep down but is that enough for you and for your sanity. Don't go running to her telling her how you feel first! Ask her first and tell her to be honest. Then depending on her answer tell her how you feel. Everything will work out for you, whether you are with her or not. Although you might not see that now, you will in time. Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland.

Well, for a start, you are certainly not alone. Millions of guys are in the exact same boat. Your depression feelings are taking a little control of you and you need to fight this back. When suffering from a little depression, we always see things negatively. No matter what it is, we always think the worst. Thats just a symtom of depression that can easily be overcome. Well, theres 2 ways, medication to help lift things a little, but is not a cure. I recommend some cognitive therapy which you can do on your own. Basically its turning these automatic negative thoughts into more realistic ones. I used to do that too. I remember my ex going out clubbing and i wasnt there. I always assumed the worst was going to happen. She was gonna get drunk and go with someone else. But this is ridiculous! You'll end up ruinin your relationship and then ruining you. So what is Cognitive therapy? Cognitive distortions come in many shapes or forms. Some of these include all-or-nothing thinking ('I passed that exam, but I only got a B. I'm a total failure'), over-generalisation ('I'll never get a job'), disqualifying the positive (being told that you've been very helpful, but rejecting the comment because 'He's just trying to be nice to me'), mind-reading ('Everyone can tell what a miserable person I am'), negative prediction ('I won't go to the party because I'll make a fool of myself'), emotional reasoning ('I feel guilty, so I must be a bad person'), so-called 'should statements' ('I should do this' or 'I must do that'), and personalisation (basically a form of paranoia). Whether or not you agree that cognitive distortions are the cause of depression, or merely symptoms of it, there's no denying the evidence that counteracting negative automatic thoughts can have a hugely beneficial effect on the depressed person. In addition, depressed people who recover using cognitive therapy are less likely to suffer depression in the future than those who recover solely using anti-depressants, because the therapy gives the sufferer the tools with which to fight off depression in the first place. Here's how to give it a try. First, draw a table on a piece of paper with the following columns; date, emotion, strength of emotion, situation, automatic thought, rational response, outcome. Now, as you go through the day, record each negative emotion as it occurs, along with the strength of that emotion and the situation you were in at the time. Then, try to identify the negative automatic thought that led to that emotion. This will take some practice, as humans are not used to analysing their thoughts. It may take you quite a while to get used to the idea of looking for the thoughts behind your feelings, but once you can do it, you'll have made a big step in the right direction. Beck compares this to standing by the side of the road counting cars, instead of standing in the middle of the road and letting them hit you. For each automatic thought, write down a rational response. For example, the thought 'I'm a useless mother' can be rationally answered with 'I'm not a useless mother - I may have made a mistake under difficult circumstances, but that doesn't make me a bad parent'. In the last column, record the outcome. Did you believe the rational response? How do you feel now? You'll probably find that you don't believe any of the rational responses at all initially, and that's perfectly normal. It can take a lot of practice before depressed people can identify their negative automatic thoughts, counteract them and believe the responses. But the more times you have the same thought, and write down the same rational response, the more likely you are to start believing that perhaps the rational response is correct after all. Negative automatic thoughts and rational responses If you're attempting to counteract your own depression using cognitive therapy - and we recommend that you do - you may find the following useful. It's a selection of negative automatic thoughts and their associated rational responses from the diaries of depressed people. Adding the '(remember: this is a negative automatic thought)' phrase at the start, and 'These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain.' at the end of each of your own rational responses may help you believe them. Obviously your thoughts and answers are likely to be different to these, but at least this might give you a guide as to how to fight each thought when it occurs. Note that cognitive therapy can be much easier when carried out with the help of a good psychologist. Ask your doctor for more details. This depression will last forever. I will never ever get better. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's not true. It will end because depression always ends. Nearly everybody experiences depression at some time or other. Some get so low that they think about suicide, but nearly all recover. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm really scared. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's pretty natural. The chemicals in my brain are out of balance, so my perception is distorted. Fear is a logical result of that. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Even if I recover, I will never truly enjoy life again. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Not true. I'll look back at this in months or years to come and think "That was a bad time", but I won't remember the details. I will be able to enjoy life 100 percent. Looking back on past pleasures may taint them with the depression of my current mood, but that doesn't mean that they weren't enjoyable at the time, and will be again in the future. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I can't be bothered to do anything today. I'll just stay in bed. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That won't help me get better. First, get up, get dressed and either go for a bike ride or, if it's raining, do some exercises in the house, until I'm sweating and out of breath. Then look at what I can do that will be constructive or fun. Mow the lawn, clear out the shed, put up some shelves, buy a magazine and read it, go to the cinema, etc. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Nothing seems real. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) The thought that things are not real is just a lie created by the depression. Once I am over this, things will again feel completely real. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. This cognitive therapy is just too hard. I'll take a rest from it today. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) No I won't. This is not some sort of game, this is my life. It may be hard, and it may give me headaches and other pains, but I must concentrate hard on combatting all the negative automatic thoughts that come into my head. Once I can successfully combat them, I can realise that they are just lies generated by the temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Only then will I start to recover from this depression. If I need to rest, wait until late evening when things feel better. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I don't believe any of this. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) So what do I believe? Do I believe that being depressed is the normal state of affairs? Do I believe that I've been depressed all my life, and that anyone who has ever been depressed has stayed depressed? No. I am depressed, it's a temporary chemical imbalance in the brain that is affecting my thought processes by tainting them with negative automatic thoughts. I can get over the depression by being positive and believing what I have written here. I may not believe these words right now, because I'm having a bad time, but they are true and no amount of depression-induced disbelief will change that. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I can't go on, the pain is too much. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Yes I can go on, because eventually I will be well again. If I can't look that far forwards, consider this; do whatever is necessary to occupy myself until the evening, when things get better. That's all it takes; one day at a time and things will improve. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I can't cope; I must take anti-depressants. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Fair enough. If I've really tried my best to cope using cognitive therapy and still things are getting markedly worse (compared with, say, a month ago), then the anti-depressant pills will help. Bear in mind, though, that once I take one I have to continue the course for several months and come off them slowly, and I must also continue with the cognitive therapy and change my lifestyle to a more sensible, enjoyable one. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Depression is the only reality. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) No it isn't. Before this happened, I didn't even really know what depression was. This will pass and I'll be free of it again. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Life isn't fair (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's right. Life isn't fair, it just is. Sometimes good things happen, sometimes bad things happen. This depression is one of the bad things, but it will pass, and life will be enjoyable again. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. This cognitive therapy doesn't work. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Don't jump to conclusions. Considering the length of time I've been depressed, I can't really expect everything to get better in just a week or a month. If it's taken nearly three months for me to get this low, it may well take me just as long to get back up again. Be patient, continue the therapy and I will get better. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Therapy only works on simple people. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's unlikely. Depression affects a lot of people, including intelligent and creative people. Therapy merely teaches me to see the depression for what it is, and counteract it. Saying that it won't work on me is just a negative automatic thought. I am strong enough to get through this. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm getting a headache with all this thinking. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's OK, I'm working hard at helping myself. Initially this therapy will be difficult, of course, but it will get easier as time goes by, until eventually it will become an automatic part of my life, like breathing or eating. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. This weather is really gloomy. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's true, but clouds and darkness on the outside can't hurt me. So it's a gloomy day, so what? That doesn't stop me doing anything, does it? I may not feel too cheerful, but it's only weather, it can't hurt. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm not used to concentrating on my negative thoughts. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) It is a bit strange, but it's actually very good for me. All of these bad thoughts are negative automatic ones generated by the temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. They can all be countered with the truth, at which point they are harmless. This thought technique will give me a more positive outlook on life once the depression is passed. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. This thought is really frightening; I don't want to deal with it. I'll just forget about it. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) No I won't. It doesn't matter how hard it is to deal with, I will face it and examine it rationally and logically. I must remember that these thoughts are not real; they are just symptoms of depression - negative automatic thoughts. Each time one appears I can face it, examine it and see it for the lie that it is. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. But there are just so many of these thoughts. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) My brain is a complex thing, and the depressed part of it is trying as hard as it can to make me feel down, by coming up with new and ever more unrealistic black thoughts. They're nothing, not real. I can defeat all of them. I should remember that 50 or even 100 thoughts may need to be written down before the depression starts to lift. Who knows, I may need to record even more than that, but it doesn't matter; I will get over it. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. These bad thoughts are so strong. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) They may be strong, but they're not real and they don't apply to me. They just come from the part of my brain that's suffering from a temporary chemical imbalance. Instead of worrying about them, just recognise that they are negative automatic thoughts. Count them, shoot them down, dodge them, do whatever I want to do mentally, but don't take any notice of them. They aren't real, they won't affect my sanity and they can't hurt the real me. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I feel detached, as though I'm watching my life take place but I'm not taking part. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) This is a tough one to bear, isn't it? It's called depersonalisation, and is a classic symptom of depression. There's not much to say except that it will pass, as will all the other symptoms. Remember that I am a single entity - body, brain and mind are all one, and what affects one will affect the other. The detachment will pass, but for the moment, just concentrate on this cognitive therapy and be thankful for what I have in life. I may feel that I can't touch what I love at the moment, but that will pass soon enough. Remember that classic description of depression; the bell-jar. That means that I can see the rest of reality but not quite touch it. Like everything else it will pass with time and concentration. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm really worried about the future. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) There's no need to be. I can concentrate on the present. I should relax, enjoy myself and generally have fun. The future will take care of itself. I can neither predict it nor control it, which makes it all the more exciting. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I feel hot, flushed, sweating and/or nervous. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's OK. These are normal symptoms of depression/anxiety, so don't worry too much about such things. Go for a walk in the cold air and things will get better. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. The raging in my head is just too fierce. I want to curl up and cry. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Fighting depression is not easy, but I should also be aware of the causes for my current state, namely over-work, possibly with a sprinkling of SAD. Taking a holiday somewhere sunny would probably be a really good idea, as would doing considerably less work, exercising a lot and going out in the evening with friends. Keep in touch with family, take up new pursuits, and enjoy the good things in life. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I feel good at the moment, but I know I'll feel bad again later, or tomorrow morning. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) This negative automatic thought is the wrong way round; the truth is that I feel good now and the chances are I will feel good again, even if there's a temporary lapse - which there may not be. If there is a lapse, I'll recover again. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm on my own. I'm scared of my own company. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) I've been perfectly happy with my own company in the past. What I'm scared of is not my own company but the thought that the depression will get to me if I stop to think. There's no need to be scared. I have the mental weapons with which to combat the depression. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm feeling better already, but it must be false; this cognitive therapy is just providing the illusion of wellness. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Without getting too metaphysical here, how can I feel good if I'm not feeling good? That's like saying 'My leg is broken, but really it's not broken'. If I'm feeling better, then I'm feeling better. If I have the nagging feeling at the back of my mind that things aren't quite right, that's just negative automatic thoughts, probably of the 'This will never end' and 'I'm really concerned about the future' variety. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. But I don't feel particularly happy today. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) What do I expect, permanent joy? Nobody in the world is permanently happy. Some days are good, some days are average, some days are crap. That's life. Just because I'm not happy doesn't mean that I'm depressed. There's a big difference, and although it may take me some time to realise it, that is a perfectly normal - and necessary - aspect of life. So don't worry. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm still having bad dreams, so I must still be depressed. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) There are two things to consider here. First, I can't do cognitive therapy in my sleep, so if there is still a chemical imbalance in my brain, it may appear in the shape of bad dreams. But secondly, I've had bad dreams in the past, so it's really nothing to worry about. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm living life automatically. I'm not thinking about what I do. I'm so shallow. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) I am not shallow, and I am thinking about what I do. But because I am nearly over this depression, I'm not thinking about everything I do from the perspective of how it will affect my future life in years to come. In other words, I'm living life as it comes and enjoying the moment, which is exactly what I should be doing. I don't need the deep insights of depression. I know that I have to change my life - work less, play more - so the depression would now just get in the way of me changing my life appropriately. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm a horrible person. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Am I? Some days I may be a bit grumpy, but that's the same for everyone. Most of the time, though, I'm pleasant to people, not rude or insulting. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I feel a bit light-headed, disconnected. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) This seems to happen mostly in the mornings. I think it's partly due to the remnants of last night's dreams, whether I remember them or not, but it's also a form of depersonalisation. Don't worry about it, just go through it and remember the last time of clarity. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Why do I need to do this therapy? Why can't I sort myself out on my own? (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) I am sorting myself out on my own. That's exactly what I am doing with this therapy. When I get a bad thought, I'm analysing it and seeing whether it's true or not. So far they've all been false, so there's no need for me to be depressed. Once I have answered all the negative automatic thoughts, I will start to get better. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. This is a truly awful thing to have happened to me. I'm just so upset by it. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) Try not to be too melodramatic. I've experienced some bad times recently, but they were due to an illness, nothing else. I can get on with enjoying life, changing some aspects of my lifestyle to make sure that nothing like this ever happens again. That's really all there is to it. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. These feelings are weird. This can't be depression, it's something else. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) No it's not, it's most definitely depression. Depression includes feelings of anxiety, stress, choking, panic, depersonalisation, fear of the future, loss of self-esteem, paranoia, etc., etc. There are so many symptoms, and all the symptoms I have felt and am feeling are due to depression, nothing more. Time, rest and most importantly this cognitive therapy will allow me to recover from this completely. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm scared to relax and be myself in case I relapse or do something silly. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) There's no need to be scared. Since I've been depressed I haven't done anything irrational, and everything I've written has been sensible and reasoned. I can relax and enjoy my life without planning how a particular event will go. There's no reason at all to be scared. I am a sensible person and depression doesn't change that. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. I'm thinking too much. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) That's OK. This is partly due to the depersonalisation, which will pass given time, and partly due to the fact that I'm busy watching my negative automatic thoughts. Just as long as I know when to relax and enjoy myself (which I will), all will be well. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Once this is over, I'll go back to my old routine and mess it up again. (remember: this is a negative automatic thought) No chance. I've been through Hell, and I'm not repeating that again. It's been horrible, and I know that my lifestyle must change. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. When I think of my past I get nostalgic and a bit low. (remember; this is a negative automatic thought). Why? With the exception of one or two incidents, my past was interesting, exciting and enjoyable. I made the most of it all at the time and enjoyed myself with good friends, so there's no need for any regrets or other nonsense. Don't worry about such things. My past is what has made me what I am, so remember it with good feelings. I don't want to go back because I've been there. I can move on to new adventures. These bad emotions are not real. They are due to a temporary chemical imbalance in my brain. Hope this helps, Tony, 27, Ireland

No, she doesnt give women a bad name. She just has given herself a bad name, no-one else. Everyone is an individual and think and feel differently. Don't let her actions blur your view of other women. Tony,27,Ireland.

I know how you feel, my gf done exactly the same and boy does it hurt and piss me off so much. Dont get bitter though, it will hurt you more and will take you longer to heal. Try to accept its over and that you deserve much better than a lyin, cheating, wee tramp. Yeah, at the moment thats what she is. she is BAD NEWS and you're on the winning streak as you have got that BAD NEWS out of your life. Not all girls are like her, in fact the majority of girls are nice, respectful and honest. Dont let this experience ruin your future relationships. I wouldnt let her around to your house. Dont even phone her, Ignore her and keep her out of your life cause all she is doing to it, is ruining it. You are much better than that. Good luck, Tony, 27, Ireland.