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Coily

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Coily last won the day on March 14

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  1. What kind of changes are we talking? How much did the relationship dynamics change? I'm trying to wrap my head around what happened between you two that caused him to wander off like a horny goat. I think there is a lot more to this than we strangers on the internet can glean with our biases. Have you gotten help for your post partum depression?
  2. I wouldn't put this on an open social media post. It reeks of desperation. I edited what you said to a "brevity is the soul of wit" simplicity. Otherwise it's just about your obsession with her. Let the women in her social media do the whole girl power "you're beautiful" routine. You can't be focused on that shallow vapid stuff, if you want to catch her attention just notice her. Not the looks, not all the other worthless fluff you stated. Give her space to mourn the end of the relationship. Listen when needed, but don't become an orbiter. You'll get, I'm sure, the madding crowd discouraging you in this; but it's your decision. I just don't want you tripping over yourself and then lamenting how you got friend zoned. Be circumspect in your interactions right now.
  3. This post goes a long way to dispelling the persistent myth that online is more smutty than meeting in person. Despite some steering that way. In the last 2 years or so a lot of the women I have met in person, not bar fly situations, more mutual interest groups have initiated sexting. That's maybe 4 out of 5? One was extremely aggressive about it, and I was rather taken aback. In some ways I chalk it up to them just being horny and desperate for sexual validation (just like these men you're encountering). In others it was they thought that's what men wanted as part of the routine in communications. This is across a lot of age demographics too. Meanwhile I'm sometimes flattered, but often confused as I haven't invested enough time or energy into those fledgling relationships.
  4. This reminds me of a woman back in college, she bought me a drink, then started fondling me. Said something about "well you have to pay me back somehow." I just about jumped over the bar it was that uncomfortable.
  5. The relationship ended. He made it very very clear that the relationship was done. Expecting him to read some.tea leaves to read your mind is a bit of an ask. Unfortunately you didn't feel the way he did about ending the relationship. I am very sorry that you are having to deal with this, but it's all on you feeling this way. Do you have some friends or family who can be called upon to support you?
  6. Yikes, that doesn't paint him in a favorable light. Out side of his lies, how is he towards you? Clearly you are deeply bothered by this, but he may have redeeming qualities too. Do those balance out these problems? Or is the spreadsheet at zero? Enough people will soapbox, but this is up to you.
  7. That makes a lot of sense why he habitually lies. Does he live with his mother currently?
  8. It's not a good look on him. As to the address, I could see that being fine. There are creepy stalkers out there. 5% on the salary, not worth paying attention to. By itself. Bad pictures, in isolation can be looked over. But still worth noting. The sale, with the discrepancy between the stories and his mother's history... Why starting to get questions more and more. Not sure what to make of the ex circus. Again in isolation none of these should really be an issue. However there are two factors here, his habitual lies and his pestering mother, and this doesn't add up well. I think you need to look at why he lies about what he does. Is it to save face? Avoid conflict? To impress others? Has he made any good faith effort to improve himself for himself? Or just go through the motions to get others off his back? How has he been aside from these known lies? I don't personally like what he's doing, but it's what you're comfortable with handling. It's all or nothing.
  9. As a man, I have experienced something very similar with the women I've been interested in. I have had about 50-60% of these women initiate sexting or try to steer things in a sexual direction. One woman started sending me nudes right after a coffee date. Another asked for pics of me after a second date. So it's not just you seeing the trend. I do have a working theory, and matches up with my experiences. Sexting has become more normal due to the pandemic. People had urges but since a lot of the gathering places were closed, sexting became more of an outlet for primal urges. After two years it became "normal" for some people as a way to vet a partner or fling.
  10. I think sometimes it can be a false humility, a "I didn't mean to suck the conversation out of the room." But overall it's a genuine, oh scrap I didn't mean to occupy the whole conversation.
  11. This, right there. This is how you need to approach it with your BF. As long as he knows this is about your insecurity, not you trying to control him, not you being possessive. You deserve a lot of credit, far too often people think their partner knows what to do by telepathy. I think you are on the right path with some of your thinking, and just need a nudge here and there on making sure that you have open calm communications. Often it's hard when we are feeling a certain way to understand how that will impose our will upon others. It might be wise for you to vocalize what you have said above, that one you meet these platonic friends your jealousy lessens. And kudos to you BF asking you about giving the ride, take that as a green flag in his respect towards you.
  12. "You have to admit that him rubbing bear grease all over his naked torso, and only wear a stetson and chaps was a little forward of him. Sure he had that 'I'm a wingman' placard, but still that gyrating like Elvis was scandalous."
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