PurpleButterfly

George... I don't know what you feel towards me. Sadness, hatred, or just a mass of emotion. I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I don't make friends easily and you were/are my best friend. You and Andrew (out mutual gay best friend) are the bestest friends I have EVER had, you two are the best things to come out of my university experience. So when we became a couple George I was so thankful to have you in my life. I just didn't want to ever get married and I never wanted children, not even with my previous ex. I know I should have told you I met someone else, but how exactly was I suppose to say that I love you but I'm not "in love" with you? How do you tell someone you don't love them anymore, especially when you look back and maybe never did. I love you to death as my friend but I know you are hurting. When I met Joseph, as unexpected as it was, we really connected on a level I've never had before. I thought breaking up with you would give you your freedom to meet someone else, I didn't want to keep you in a relationship I wasn't fully committed too. I feel such a hypocrite because I'm now engaged to Jo. I know you don't know this yet. I know when you find out you're going to ask why him and and not you. The truth is I was so surprised at myself for accepting his proposal. But when he asked, I didn't feel that pang of 'no way, not ever' like I did with you and my previous ex. I hate that I lost you. You are my bestest friend. I'm sorry I couldn't return those feelings. I just want you to know I hate myself, I hate myself every single day and I feel guilty in my new relationship because I'm happy. I just never wanted to lose you, not ever. I'm crushed. I feel like apart of me has died. Goodbye George. Thank you for everything. I will always be thankful to have had you as my friend.