shademan

more like you keep thinking about ur own world and within urself, people look at you and it seems u cant see them. it's like ur looking through glass

Things are not as they seem anymore, i am sick of burping out my feelings for no apparent reason, I also don't think me whining is gonna fix anything, and i don't believe my problems are ever gonna go away. My constant bitter feelings are growing that's a fact, but what next, will i act everyday, and consider everything to be normal, will i believe in fate and destiny and not do something about it, i don't believe i ever will unless i have the power to overcome my fear. Fear of society, fear of self regret, fear of rejection, any kind of fear that takes away your will to act. I no longer feel the reason to exist neither do i feel the reason to continue this cycle of a so called organized social enslavement whome people call life. What is wrong with me and why do i continue to go to work and act as if everythigng is alright, but what can i do, i can't end my life, i can't control people, i can't fix the world, i can't do what i want, and most of all there is nothing in this life that i love. But that can't be true, i got family, i got a girl, i got this job, when is it that i can walk out, and gain my individuality and face corruption and the lies of this country, when can i get a chance to fight and redeem myself for accepting to live in denial and pain for 20 years, and what next, even if this world is a better place when does this story end. I guess the clock is ticking and it's a matter of time before it all backfires and i discover what the heck is going on.

I think when you are too self absorbed you start getting dislocated from reality and that's why we start to wonder which things are real and then it evloves in questioning Is life really a reality or is it a screan infront of my eyes.

I am seeking anyone's help or advise and i'll surely be gratefull if anyone would analyze my situation. I started dating this amazing girl 5 months ago, we are on very good grounds and we share alot of common interests except when it comes to communication, we clash alot when either on of us is in a bad mood, i however know how to deal with her, but she doesn't know how to deal with me, i tried several times to act as if i'm alright but i bottle up and one day i just burst. one of the main things bothering me is that she likes to be busy 247, it's a hectic life style for me, as i on the other hand like to relax, chill home or with her. we fight now daily, and i admit i am mistaken most of the time because i want her to act in a different way, i love her with the deepest intentions of love and caring but i got issues that she never understands, i am diagnosed with bipolar depression and i'm paranoid. I don't want to make her feel posessed or controlled at the same time i want her to at least understand the constant pain and agony i'm experiencing, sometimes i don't trust her , sometimes i do , i don't have a fixed mind on one thing. I feel something is going wrong in our relationship, the excitment is gone, i feel she's so detached it's making me feel lonely, i explained all these feelings to her, but she keeps assuring me that it's just temporary because of work and family problems which i know do exist, but still i lost all tastes for everything. I even started a new very promising job and i already feel i want to quit, i wish i could do one thing to make me feel a bit happy and let go a bit of that leash i put around her neck. I feel that she is slipping away from me, i don't want no ordinary relationship, i want something special, i miss our first few months, now im so depressed and lonely and she doesnt know how to deal with me and i feel like im just strangling her .

I need a way to trust my gf , i just can't help but think she's lying to me or making up stories , i am so insecure and i need a way to just stop thinking that way or let go .

if getting burnt is a feeling , drunk is a feeling , horny is a feeling , i guess love is a feeling too ? if you don't feel , then why bother with a relationship get a blow up doll.

i once read something very usefull from a bartender .... it ain't over until it's over . so stop whining and freaking out , if it's working it's working , if it's not let it go and look for another , it ain't the end of the world , i would suggest you sit and talk about it , if he cares he will try to comfort you and not make you freak out , if not then he'll probably blow off a couple of defensive words and get aggravated .

umm simple if you are mature enough you will care for her and hold your horses for a while cuz you choose to be with her for the sake of her not her tunnel.

No one can define love , but i would like to think true love is two human's energetic spheres coming into contact and balancing the equation to perfect harmony.

i always loved this topic , anyways im no expert nor im gonna give you advice but there is a saying that says ,"why do we fall ?, to pick ourselves up again .." anyways , i dont think falling out of love is the answer to your problems , but i think is to fall in love all over again with someone that respects you , cherishes you and appreciates your feelings and who you are , such person will make you over come any sadness or grief in your life , because in the end of the day we all need someone by our side to listen to us and share our lives with .

I think you guys need to become friends first.

ok , i'm impressed , but i never actually watched yoda or starwars , but if it was there then i gotta see that movie ... and you are the first one to actually understand me ! but understanding is different than living .

i went through it all before , then i would get angry sometimes , and i wouldn't know why , i took a decision to embrace that feeling of anger , i felt strong, i'm talking constant anger , and staying quiet , just talking to myself , about what a *CENSORED* *CENSORED* *CENSORED* *CENSORED* *CENSORED* i am to feel love and to be weak , the problem with that is it turned to hate, and hate isn't nice , cuz it spreads like cancer , i changed towards everyone , which made me lose alot of people and i still do , only i don't feel any remorse , but i learned that i have to use anger wisely next time .

anger, taught me hate , hate , taught me wisdom.

man i used to think like you , but when i observed closely , i'm terrified of not being single forever.