yasmina
-
Posts
29 -
Joined
yasmina's Achievements
-
I also totally agree with that...right now he is doing EVERYTHING humanly possible in his power to get me back..and im sure he would sustain that for a few months...but once the routine sets back in...he will still inevitably be the same lying cheating man...if he can lie to my face once he can do it again, its just this time i know the warning signs...and i am not willing to stick around and find out again... I hit rock bottom, and i have slowly climbed out of the hole....im reclaiming my power and my spirit that I let him chew away at. There are still ups and downs and its a hell of a bumpy road...its all but a lesson in life.. remember...what has been given can be taken away. he no longer has my permission to make me feel sad.
-
Well he is back...he saw his things packed..i thought he would fall on the floor...he refused to take any of it...his excuse was if he cant have me he doesnt want anything in his life...and he told me to throw it out...so thats fine im going to give it to people who need it..i will just donate it all... i do cry my own tears privately...i feel the pain of seperation and betrayal...i would nvever give him the pleasure of seeing this though...ive also learnt that i cant hate him..because hate means i am still wasting a hell of alot of time thinking about him...he WAS this is my life NOW...concentrate on that... You are so right BeStrongBeHappy, when I think back to all the times he got out of a situation when i just knew he was doing something I just cringe. There is no point in beating yourself up over it because you do what you can at the time, as long as you see the light thats all that matters. He is still going on about how I am the one and he now realised that, the words of a desperate man. I truly believe he did see there was not much out there for him and what he had at home was perfect. Too little too late. I must say it is hard resisting the barrage of compliments, love, etc. But I will - its all a matter of time before he gets sick of it and his true self emerges.
-
Thankyou guys. Thankyou so much all your words bring me up every moment i begin to doubt myself. Today was D-day and I saw him. He came bawling his eyes out saying that he didnt know what was out there and now he knows i am perfect for him etc etc...he cried and cried and confessed and cried. I must admit it was hard for me to hear this and not run back into his arms. I suprisingly found myself not unable to cry, but not wanting/needing too...for these last 2 weeks I spent purely alone I found myself and being confronted with him I found that for me, its over. It will be truly hard due to years of attachment and so on, but I have done the hard yards... There will be many times when I am tempted to go back to him. But I just dont feel it like I used too...its a shame he does now... Well guys wish me luck because getting through this next part is going to be a long trek, but I will get to the top of Everest, everyone on their journey will make it to the top while those that betrayed us and still at the bottom.
-
well...the drama unfolds... he rang me an hour later...bawling his eyes out...saying how much he loved me bla bla...every sweet thing any girl would die to hear...he said to me she is nothing he hasnt spoken to her since he has been away. BUSTED - he has been emailing her telling her he misses her. Lie number one. Then oh this is the best..he says to me...I thought I didnt love you anymore so I had to be with another girl to realise you were the one for me. When I heard this I honestly felt like laughing...the phone then cut out..he has cut his trip short and is at the airport on standby..I am standing my ground and will not be at home I am staying at my mums. The emotions and pain I have been through in the last while have honestly had me thinking I was dying. I will not turn back all of my hard work and even give him another chance. I have been faced with this obstacle for a reason - this union was cut short before I married him and I am thankful. I will hold strong for everything that is still to come my way. There is a wonderful life out there you just have to get through the rain to get to the rainbow. I couldnt have done this without all your loving caring words.
-
Thankyou for your helpful post...and I know you are right...I have been meditating, doing everything I can to better myself... An update... He rang me (still hadn't checked his email) so apparently excited to talk to me. Could tell by my voice something was wrong and asked worriedly if I was ok. I simply said...I know everything...she called me..check your email..he just said ok and hung up...whats the deal with that?
-
You just shone a bright torch for me Juliana thankyou! You are right! I can end it with him in any way I like, ofcourse with my morals and dignity still in tact. I am just pro-longing the pain by waiting till he returns, and why am I still so worried if I ruin his holiday or not- he and his emotions are no longer my problem! I will send the email and let the universe take care of the rest. It is time to start my healing. (keep you all posted on his reply - if at all)
-
Just a little development..he has extended his stay by a week...so that means he wont be back till wednesday week...I just dont think I cant hold it in any longer...all the while they are sending lovey dovey emails to eachother...I dont want him to come back and say he is leaving me... Would an email do the job? SImply... She rang me. I know everything. I know how you got the mark on your neck. I know that when she gets back from overseas she is divorcing her husband for you. Your belongings are packed and will need to be picked up upon your arrival.
-
Yes I really wanted to notify her husband but I have no way of getting his contacts...I know who she is but I dont know anyone else in her family... I cant even begin to tell you how hard it is trying to keep it together and not being able to tell him while he is away..from what I can gather she will be leaving her husband for him...I know they deserve eachother but its so hard knowing he will go onto somebody new and he wont deal with the pain of seperation... I am holding as strong as I can, what goes around comes are right?
-
I am certainly letting my anger out, my tears and every other emotion I never knew I could even feel. THe best medecine is talking talking and more talking. Thank God I have a wonderful support network. He may infact end up with this girl, and in the beginning this bothered me to no end, but now I am coming to terms with the fact that they deserve eachother. A very helpful quote for me - If they will do it with you, they will do it to you.
-
Thankyou so much for your support guys...i cant begin to mention how helpful it is at the moment. I still have a little while to wait till he gets back, but that will give me time to collect my thoughts and put the emotions aside. I have packed his belongings for him, im not going to be petty and wait for him to do it, he will only prolong it and the pain. Even though i am extremely upset I know that reacting in a rash manner (confronting her, telling her husband) and the rest, will only give him and excuse for cheating. So acting calmly and ice cold will give the cheater absolutely no reason to justify the affair, only more reason y u are a good person. I believe one day he will realise how special I was, but when that day comes I just wont care anymore. I will keep you all posted and let you know how the big day goes down..no doubt I will need the support..
-
I have some words of wisdom to shed...even though many a person has said this..it certainly will not hurt to say it again....ALWAYS trust your instincts...most times, if you suspect he is cheating, there probably is something going on...heres my bit... I have been suspcious for a long time...but every time he would say how much he loves me and nothing is going on...we even go engaged...today..i intercepted emails that they have sent to eachother ( she is a married woman). I am devastated but relieved at the same time...he does not know yet as he is overseas and gets back on wednesday...(still professing his undying love to me) Some people would burn his clothes or confront the girl ( i kno her), but instead I will act like a lady with dignity and not even give him the satisfaction of how i know. I will merely say, I know what you have been doing, you were once a man i admired and had respect for, now you are nothing in my eyes. Please leave and if you have any dignity left, do not contact me again... Right now i feel like i will never recover...but there is a light...
-
Well I am in this exact situation at the moment, I am tossing up whether to hire a PI or not. I have snooped through his phone/email and found that he has been talking to a family friend that is married. He says they are just friends yet he hid it from me and she hides it from her husband. He swears till he is blue in the face that they just talk. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place at the moment. We have been together for 5 years so I feel i need solid proof. is there a way of confronting him so that he will feel comfortable to tell me? Any suggestions? I am at my wits end. Thanks
-
it came out of the blue which is what really shook me. I dont understand it - but people come into your life to teach you a lesson and when the lesson is learnt they leave. I am trying to be philosophical, trying to survive. im trying to let him go, its so hard. I know just like everyone else, I will get there in the end. THanx guys
-
Well it finally happened. After 4.5 long years my bf broke up with me. We had many problems - religion conflicts being one of the main issues. Literally one day we were perfect - the next my bf turns around and says i am holding him back from living his life and he doesnt love me like he used to anymore. I was just shocked beyond words. I have tried talking to him about but he is cold, either doesnt answer my calls or if he does he answers with a "yeh what". After being so in love to nothing I am just dumb founded. I cant breathe I cant sleep. When sleep does come its a release but when I wake I am worse than before. i feel like im falling apart. And i know 99.9% of people go through these emotions when they break up, but I just dont know what to do. I read books i go to the gym i speak to friends. None of which seems to work. Each day seems to be worse and worse...I suppose the first step is NC. I just dont know...
-
well im very much in the same boat as u...my bf and i are different religions...he is muslim i am catholic....we have been together for 3 years...his parents hate me...and we have broken up many times because of this reason...tonight his parents really put the hard word on him to leave me and go overseas and get married....i think its the most ridiculous thing in the world for a love to be torn apart because its not 'acceptable' for u to be together. He doesnt want to break up and nor do i...but i also dont want to be the reason for his parents never talking to him again...and u might think oh they love him they will get over it...they wont...they are extreme..its their way or nothing...am i doomed to be depressed and alone for the rest of my life?...i dont think so...and either are u....it does get better...even though u feel like shrivelling into oblivion now...u will be better...and u will love again and claim that u never loved like that before....itts the first few months that either make u or break u...remember...pain is weakness leaving the body