hurtabandoned

I have never heard of that and I have worked in a drug store. I think that refusing to sell condoms to anyone is irresponsible. I think that the person that you asked probably had a moral objection to selling condoms to a minor.

I have talked to him at length about the potential consequences that could have happened if he had got caught. I don't know if he's gotten it or not. He admits to having a problem but he has yet to seek any help.

Yes, the computer is mine and I'm the one who pays the bill. I don't want the images on my computer nor do I want one of the many viruses that tend to float around on these sights. I usually have Cybersitter on to prevent this but I recently used my restore disc and didn't reinstall it. That's why I checked the history. There are also other reasons why his behavior bothers me. While I'm at work he's watching our young daughter - who is not getting much attention - while he sits at the computer she's in her room by herself. There are also other issues at hand as well. He got caught by myself - bringing prescription drugs [that weren't his] into the house. I took them and flushed them down the toilet. He says he not doing that anymore. How can I be sure of that - he's lying about something else now. I think that if he cared enough about me then he wouldn't deliberately do things that hurt me. It makes me feel like he doesn't give a darn about the way that I feel. I feel like I'm the only one that is trying to hold the family together and all he's doing is trying to do his best to destroy it. Thanks for the back up schatzieK - I just read your reply.

I got home from work this evening and sat down at my computer. I began looking through the history. At first I found nothing. After looking further, I discovered that he had been surfing the web for porn. For several reasons this bothered me. For one, I find it insulting and offensive. He knows that I don't want that kind of material viewed on my computer. It also brings up bad memories of his infidelity that occurred a year ago. When I got upset about it he got all defensive and claimed he did nothing wrong. He kept saying, "I'm a 33 year old man." I guess he thinks that's a good reason to stomp all over my feelings. Then he started on me about showing him respect - EXCUSE ME. He knows how I felt about this and he had agreed not to look at that stuff on my computer. So who was disrespecting who?

I've been with my husband for 7 years, married six. We've been through alot during that time. He has some emotional/mental problems that I just can't handle anymore. Most of the time he is okay, but sometimes he gets into these moods and flys off into rages where he calls names and threatens me. He also does things on a whim that he regrets later. (Too many of these to list) He is holding my daughter over my head. Today he slapped me hard enough to bend my glasses. As I picked up my daughter to leave he said if I left he would have me arrested for kidnapping because I was going out the door with my daughter. (He has had me falsely arrested before.) I can't leave her there with him being so unstable. I have a question, I have some of his threats caught on audio tape. How useful is that to me in proving that I'm not the one with the problem. Would this be admissible in court.

I swear that's my same story. My husband cheated on me a few months ago. He would hover over his cell phone too. He was turning his ringer off when he was home so his calls would go to voice mail. He worked third shift and when he came home he would take the phone to the bedroom. It was suspicious so I nabbed it while he slept and found another womans name in the phone book. I called the number and talked to a relative of the girl. She thought he was divorced. I thought that had ended it but it continued. I was suspicious and asked him about it. He got defensive and was oh-so offended that I didn't believe him. He too, would flip it around and the argument always shifted to something else that I was at fault for - anything at all that diverted attention away from himself. And the lies just kept coming. It only ended when I found out where the girl worked and I told her to leave my family alone. Go with your gut. I had that same sick, nagging feeling that something wasn't right. Don't feel bad about snooping. She's giving you reasons to. If there's something going on you need to know. Not only do you need to know this so you can figure out what you want to do about this relationship but the cheating can also put your health at risk. Don't believe the lies. My husband poured them on pretty thick. I know that you want to believe in her and that's what she's counting on. Beware of someone who is defensive and shifts the blame. What she's really frustrated about is getting caught and being put on the spot.

I don't think that being that graphic with a child is needed. I do believe that the behavior can't be allowed to continue. Keep talking to them but also you should try a preventative method. Strict supervision - they don't need to play together without an adult present in the immediate area. If they are being watched better then it can't happen.

If you are still looking at this just know that you don't have to continue down this type of path. You can choose to choose better for yourself. I lost my viginity when I was 13. I learned my lesson and waited until I was 18 when I got engaged. People here are only being hard on you because many of us have been there and done that and it's hard to sit back and watch someone make some of the same choices that they may have made. Especially when many of us have felt first hand the consequences to those kind of choices. Good Luck to you. Treat yourself better.

What your husband did was because he is in pain. He probably thinks that you are getting what you deserve. He has been feeling as empty as your home is right now. I can't stress to you the damage that cheating does to a spouse. If my husband cheated on me again he wouldn't be lucky enough to get a mattress. We are still together and we are doing fine but things can never go back to the way it was. Even though we don't talk about it anymore, I sometimes still think about it. It's only been a few months ago but I can tell you now that it will still hurt 10 years from now. Handle this how YOU feel is right. Your attorney has your financial security in mind but he doesn't have to live your life. Be prepared that your husband may have come to a decision that he can't handle what has happened. It takes alot of time and energy out of a person when they are constantly thinking about the past and wondering if it will happen again. If he's at that point there may not be much you can do. In that case you may have to let it go. If it goes that way I urge you to handle it gracefully. There's no point in having a nasty divorce if that can be avoided.

Unfortunately, when you cheat (in any form) and get caught by your spouse even if things seem to you to be getting better - it's rarely so for the spouse. You may not have realized it but he never stopped thinking about it. I've been in your husband's shoes. It's hard to cope with something like that and even though it can be forgiven it will never be forgotten. I hate to say this but turning his phone off along with the other things was a bad idea. He has a right to be upset - even if he isn't handling it very well himself. Cut him some slack and reinstate his things. After all, you were the one that messed up - why punish him. He's obviously been agonizing over this for some time. Acting like that isn't in your best interest.

My husband was cheating on me a few months back. I found her number on his phone and I called it. He was telling her that he was divorced. I had thought that had ended it but this girl didn't have much in the way of morals so she didn't care. A month later I found out it was still going on. I found out where she worked and met with her in person. I told her that it was over. She hasn't had the nerve to call my husband again. I would tell her. Even if you confront your boyfriend and he agrees to end it you would have to trust in his word. Since he's been doing this then you can't really count on that. Letting it be known that you are and have been involved with him will put a "monkey wrench" into things and hopefully it would end there. Micheal2 is right. He may try to put a spin on it and make it out to be your fault. He may make a huge deal out of you looking at things on his computer to try to divert attention away from what he has done. He might try to minimize whats going on by saying that it wasn't a big deal.

Little background info: I've been married for 6 years. My husband and I went through some hard times a few months back when I had discovered that he had an affair. We are still together and are getting along fine now. Anyway, about a week ago I had a heated dream about my husband's best friend. He's a friend of mine as well. It's confusing to me because of #1. I'm not the cheating type and #2. I never thought of this man in that way. I woke up wondering where that came from. Could there be some meaning behind this or am I just over thinking it?

The abuse doesn't have to come in the form of out-right insults. The commenting on the other women in your prescence is just as big of a slap in the face. It is NOT a "guy thing" to make comments about other women in front of you or to be telling you how gorgeous his previous girlfriends were. Any husband that has any brains what-so-ever would know better than to do something like that. When you talked to him about the comments he should have apologized but instead he made excuses and he's still doing it. He's fully aware that it's bothering you, yet he does it anyway. Is that how love is nowadays? If looks weren't that important to him then why did he bring it up? He had to know that it would hurt you - so why say that if it wasn't a big deal to him. Even if you asked, why did he feel the need to point out all of your supposed flaws - he shouldn't have said something so cold. And he made enough comments to make a long list. I'm sorry, but if my husband said something that hateful to me I'd be giving him a list of stuff he could pack. If you love someone, what they look like shouldn't matter. After all, we are all going to change in the course of our relationships. People get wrinkles, gray hair or go bald, and gravity happens. That's a part of life whether we like it or not. If you really love someone you don't say things or do things to tear your partner down. Partner is the key word there. A husband or wife should want to protect their loved one from harm not inflict it.

Someone that truly loves you would never say things like that to you - and to do this to you in front of friends. It's not like those things can be taken any other way that hateful. And he knows it. My ex husband was verbally abusive. He always called me fat (I was heavy before we married) and other things I'm not going to say here. I didn't realize it at the time but he wasn't bothered by my size at all. He had his own self esteem issues and it made him feel better. The smaller I felt - the bigger he felt. Sick and twisted isn't it. It worked for him for 5 years. In that time I totally lost the person that I once was. I felt worthless. I hated myself and I think deep down I had begun to believe what my husband was saying. One day I finally had enough. I gathered up what little strength I had left and told him to get out. It was the best thing that I've ever done. The point is, he may not be saying and doing these things because he really believes you to be unattractive. Also as long as he can get away with it, it will continue. Don't change yourself just to please him. If you do that you are allowing him to manipulate you. Why would he stop this behavior if it got him results? Don't allow yourself to be treated that way.

I miscarried about 2 years prior to the birth of my present child. She's just a toddler now and wouldn't know what that really meant. When she gets older I plan on telling her. I would tell her that she had a brother or sister but that the baby just wasn't strong enough to make it into the world. I would also tell her that because of the loss we know how much of a blessing it is that she made it here and is with us today. I would speak of it in a more positive way and avoid getting into the details of the event. My parents did tell me about a previous lost sibling that happened before me. I think I was about 8 when I was told. The right age will vary among children.