Orange123

OK, well, I have been with my boyfriend for over 8 years and we have great sex. He has an orgasm just about every time. I have thought in the past that I have had one, but I'm not sure. I really don't think I have. I think I've come close to having one, but ....... It sucks being a girl sometimes. Anyway, Every once in a great while, and I do mean very rarely, I have, what I think is an orgasm in my sleep. I guess it would be the same thing as a guys "wet dream." When this does happen, I am usually having a sex dream and I wake myself up and... well, my clitoris is, well, kinda pulsing, and it feels really nice. So I guess this is an orgasm, right? The only thing is, how can I get this to happen during sex? When it happens during my dream, it so rarely happens that it isn't gratifying, and it can never be as gratifying as having one with the one you love. It must totally be a mental thing, otherwise, how else could I achieve one while I am asleep, with no stimulation? I hate not being able to. I often think I am broke, and just one of the unlucky girls that will never have one, or a real one anyway, during sex. . I have even found myself feeling jealous of my boyfriend because he KNOWS when he has one, and he has one all of the time. He can even give himself one. I have tried that as well, because he always tells me that he can't really know how to give me one if I don't. We have tried many times until we are both sore, and we have tried different things, even vibrators, which arn't as appealing as they sound. And it just ends up the same way. Can anyone help me? should I think about getting hypnotized to let my mind relax so that I can have one(half joking ). Or am I doomed to NEVER have one and just be sexually frustrated forever? So anyway, any help would be GREATLY appreciated. thanks

Thank you guys for all of your advice. The truth is, I knew already it was a part of his upbringing. the same as Kipster. His mom always did all of the chores, and she never even asked him to do any of them, and his father never does them either. He did move out with his friends for about 5 months before we moved in together. I stayed over almost every night, but I didn't do any of the chores because none of them were my responsibility, except the dishes occasionally. when he lived with his friends, after I taught him to do the laundry, he did it himself. Yes, he would generally let it pile up like a typical guy, but he did it. I told him I was proud of him that he was doing all of this for himself. Then when we moved back in with his mom together, he helped out the same way at first. but then..... alass.... the old habbits came back. I don't want to make him sound like a total slob. He does clean up after himself for the most part, except for the soda cans next to the bed, and laundry. He is typically a neat guy. I would never think of leaving him for something as trivial as this, he would have to do something really, really, really bad!!! I love him with all my heart, and like I said before, I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I also have thought about what you all had said about other guys being the same way, I know that is true for the most part, and I don't want another guy anyway, mine is just great, except for this. He does try though. I do admit it, but ...... I just hate the part where, he doesn't really EXPECT me to do it ..... you are definatly right when you say that he just doesnt THINK about it. I just wish he would, like I do. Sometimes he does it all by himself, but that is very rare, and when he does I let him know how happy it makes me. When I lived with my father, I had to do all of my laundry and the dishes since I was eight years old, and I dont want to be the only one to do the chores for the rest of my life. I have asked him about when we have our own place though. I said..." you will help out around the house right? If I do all the laundry and 'typical girl stuff' you will do the fixing and mowing the lawn and 'typical guy stuff', right" he said yes, but I just worry about that not happening and me doing it all by myself. And I rarely "nag" about the chores, only when it really gets to me, which is usually around that time of the month anyway. I have talked to him about it, or rather tried to, but just like you guys said before, he just gets irritated at the topic. I will have to try the list thing where I give him a choice though, that sounds like a good idea. I dont want to irritate him, I just want fairness. is that too much to ask?

hello, My problem is this: I have been in a great relationship for over 8 years. I met my boyfriend in highschool and we have been together ever snce. In the past two years we have moved in together, in his parents home. So we don't have all the regular responsibility of owning our own personal home, we both still have responsibilities, general responsibilities like chores and such. well, our relationship is great for the most part. we can talk to eachother about anything, and he is generally understanding. But the problem is, he is just plain lazy most of the time. He won't do anything unless he absolutely has too, or if i nag him about it. The laundry doesn't get done unless I do it, or if I ask him about 5 times to do it. occasionally he surprises me and makes the bed. He also makes dinner sometimes, but then again he likes to make dinner. our room gets messy, and the only one who cleans it is me, unless I ask him, but then he gets in a mood because he has to clean his own mess. he always leaves his clothes on the floor. I told him a couple of times that i wouldnt wash any clothes that were not in the hamper. but then i feel bad and wash them anyway. he doesnt take responsibility for his pet. when it gets sick, i have to take it to the vet, AND give it it's medicine, which is a real chore. I told him he needed to take responsibility for his animal, but then he gets mad about that. The thing is, I would just like him to take it upon himself to do some things. its not like he does typical "man" work around the house like mowing the lawn or fixing things either. I love him with all my heart, and I want to be with him forever, but this really bugs me. I have talked to him about it in the past, and things change for about 2 or 3 days, then we are right back to normal. When I have off of school,(which i go full time) and my part-time job, i have to do all the chores that need to be done, as well as homework. when he has off of work, he generally does nothing, lays around, or sits on the computer. this is probably the actions of a typical guy, i know, but I feel he is better than that. I need advice on what to do. is there some way to secretly train him to do these things without him knowing? please help!! thanks